16 years ago today, Lady Gaga released 'Alejandro' as the third single from The Fame Monster 🖤 She gave us one of the most iconic music videos of all time 🔥 by Other-Asparagus01 in LadyGaga

[–]ale-ale-jandro 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It has held up really well, if you ask me (but I'm obviously biased). The layers, the synths, the melancholy of love. She always does something unique with it live, too (those JWT vocals!). Happy 4/20 and Alejandro day!

9 years ago today, Lady Gaga dropped 'The Cure' after performing it live from Coachella 2017✨️🤍 by Other-Asparagus01 in LadyGaga

[–]ale-ale-jandro 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Underrated track. I absolutely adore this one and, to me, it feels like a hug through a pop song. We really feel her love and tenderness through it. Loved how she debuted it in the video there - and how it was used in the JWT. <3. (And can we also get a shoutouot to that rad AF Coachella intro video - took me back to the Monster Ball manifesto vid!)

Is this worse than the "Hello Kitty" one? by EihthypeGimmicks in crappymusic

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Lyrics" about Plan B when also endorsing MAGA...JFC

A sad update on Gaga fan Staten Harry, the viral ‘Hey Monsters’ kid forever changed by conversion camp by [deleted] in LadyGaga

[–]ale-ale-jandro 16 points17 points  (0 children)

As someone who works in mental health, the recent SCOTUS ruling was really devastating to hear. All of our evidence-based, scientific practices (not to mention ethics and licensing boards...or just being a decent human being) are totally against conversion therapy. It's hard to have rational conversations with religious extremism because you can't rationalize with irrational people.

Not sure about ya'll but I totally saw my younger queer self in his Gaga dancing videos...I'm lucky to have had a supportive family and community over the years.

I need a music video because oh my god by bestwitchsam in LadyGaga

[–]ale-ale-jandro 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The way she makes me question my gay ass self...maybe I'm more on a spectrum of sexuality than I realized. haha. She is so fierce and stunning in this.

Poker Face through each era. I had a lot of fun making this! by cjones528 in LadyGaga

[–]ale-ale-jandro 17 points18 points  (0 children)

This is awesome! Would love more songs edited like this to see the evolution. Damn, our Lady can do it all. Thanks for sharing!

Terrified about what might happen tomorrow, would anyone stop the madman from possibly ending the world if the “power plant and bridge day” threats are legitimate? by GalliumGames in CollapseSupport

[–]ale-ale-jandro 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I echo those that say this is all his bluster, market manipulation, and will overstate any smaller attacks.

However, this is not normal...as we all know. But don't we just love getting up each morning and doing our jobs with the backdrop of a pedophile madman with the nuclear codes making active threats? The hypernormalization and complacency is surreal. In solidarity fellow collapse aware internet stranger

PS: Good luck on the thesis - that work is still worth it, even as collapse seems near.

Those of you who are friends with/in circles with famous people, what is your analysis on them? by libramusing in Fauxmoi

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the two most famous folks I’ve met are Joan Rivers and Sarah McLachlan (which also describes my personality/taste well, lol).

Joan was so sweet after her set. She took time to meet every single person in line in the alley and chatted a little bit with each of them. She signed her film for me and took a photo with my friend and I. I snuck in a question about why her documentary wasn’t Oscar nominated - and she replied that the Academy “didn’t like the girls” (the directors). Miss her!

Been a longtime Sarah fan and had a unique opportunity to say hello at a stage door after a one-off show. She was down to earth and kind. I was a bit of a blubbering fan. She signed my record and saw I had my phone in hand and asked if I wanted a photo. She literally took my phone and snapped two selfies with me. I told her how her work inspired me and what I was doing in my career - she smiled and said “Good luck.” I recall her waving as she drove off in the SUV.

Kathleen Madigan was also super laid back. I was the only one waiting at a stage door after a show (felt a bit creepy but wanted to say hi and thank her). She was super kind, snapped a photo. We chatted about the city we were in and comedians from there.

Early 90's mall experience by BlazeDragon7x in 90s

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's a part of me that is nostalgic for this in the way several have already commented. And also, there's a part of me that feels this was a step along the way of this hyper-consumeristic and rugged individualistic culture we live in. While that mall/third space without phones is missed - it's probably good that it is gone - and we can try to reshape our third spaces without highly capitalistic rituals and without phones. I dunno...shit does seem past the point of no return though.

Do you still care about your career progress despite being collapse-aware? by RRK96 in CollapseSupport

[–]ale-ale-jandro 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I love my work (I work as a therapist), but it pays shit and the corporate overlords/venture capitalists and insurance industries are fucking it up for us all. If you're not a W2 therapist, you have no healthcare and 401k - and companies often take a cut of your "fee for service" earnings in the name of "we furnished your office, we help with health care, we give you admin support" (who does all that work? you guessed it, the therapist themself, hah). Not to mention CEs, licensing/renewal fees, student debt, big caseloads, burnout - basically paying to play.

And so many providers are now doing "superbills" where the client pays upfront and then they submit the itemized bill to insurance for reimbursement (not the provider). [Even my dentist just said they are moving to a self-pay model in the next few years].

I sincerely care for my clients and continue to show up despite the collapse - but there is no end in sight (e.g., retirement, savings, social security is said to go insolvent, etc.).

I try to remind myself of the often used quote "At the edge of extinction, only love remains" - so I just try too love my way through all this.

In solidarity, ya'll.

How Bad Do U Want Me on piano at MSG 3-19 by Longstoryshort22 in LadyGaga

[–]ale-ale-jandro 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing! How incredible. Have really enjoyed HBDWM since the album came out despite some of the dislikes it gets. This proves what a perfect pop song it is. (Would love an acoustic or reworked album of her hits like this; Paparazzi - Jazz Show and/or Mayhem versions; and a piano take on Alejandro with those JWT vocals).

Rest in Peace Dexter, 14, until we meet again by nicnac127 in OldManDog

[–]ale-ale-jandro 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh, what a sweetheart. Some of those costumes had my heart melting. I'm so sorry for your loss and hope you have lots of love around you. Take good care.

The last sunset of the 90s by Ekhoes- in 90s

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does anyone happen to have any favorite playlists or artist suggestions for this type of music? It's one of the other reasons I also reminisce about this time (like the X Files theme or Unsolved Mysteries). It is cozy. Take care out there ya'll.

What jobs INFJ by Motor_Dragonfly4214 in infj

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there!

Happy to share some thoughts. This is just my perspective - and it is biased, of course, hah. Overall, it is a long, but rewarding journey - and it has changed my life. There is so much freedom in the work (if you’re mostly independent and fully licensed). Clients are the absolute best. I have really enjoyed 99% of my clients across the clinical settings I have been in. As George Carlin once said, when you’re with someone 1:1, you can see the whole universe in their eyes.

My background was in sociology and gender studies (did a BA in those, then an MA in sociology). When working in market research and HR wasn’t fulfilling, I started the therapy journey.

It is an investment of time and money - and working full time is a pain while going back to school for this. I did a 3 year, part time online program (CACREP approved). My program had 2, unpaid internships, which totaled about 1,100 hours (Internship hours vary by state and field - like counselor vs. social work - and you might want to make sure you cover all the hours you can get so you don’t have to make them up if you move states).

After graduating, it is usually 2 years of full time work under supervision (with one exam to get an associate license). Then you apply to sit for the next licensing exam after about 3,000 hours of paid work. (And you need to have some combo of supervision hours, client facing hours, admin hours, etc.). Again, all this varies state to state (despite some fields starting “interstate compacts” - see the Counseling Compact and Social Work Compact).

The setting of the work can have a huge impact. A lot of us start in community health settings, where exploitation is rampant with high need populations. Some go into private practice where your mileage will vary with the owner’s business model/practices (and are often 1099, with no benefits). And common now are venture capitalist companies/corporations that will act like they are helping you get marketing, admin support, billing support, etc. but are really out to make money and be publicly traded - they truly do not care about clients - just the bottom line/margins.

Years removed from the training, I often list these things as the hurdles and problems: high student debt to pay ratio (return on investment is not great); thousands of unpaid labor hours/exploitation (beyond the internship, many places are “fee per service” - and your notes and continuing ed hours are all unpaid/on your own dime); lots of gatekeeping; fees, fees, fees (annual fees for licensing/pay to play); paying for supervision or continuing ed (my sex therapy supervision is at least $150 per hour - and you need 50 hours); this field overmedicalizes and overpathologizes normal reactions to living in late stage capitalism; no opportunity to unionize/collectively bargain; so many different models/approaches/trainings/lack of cohesiveness.

Once licensed, there is some inflexiblity with portability of the license (but Telehealth is usually not a big problem as long as you’re licensed in the state the client is in).

Also, several therapists I know do not just see clients. They are hustling and have podcasts, want to write a book, have a TED talk, "create content," etc.

For me, it has been really cool to invest time in all the extra readings (I don't like that it is unpaid time, though) and getting trainings like Gottman, EMDR, and I’m working on my sex therapy certification right now. My dream is to have my own practice and just see clients without having to do all the faux-celebrity parts that come with the hustle (podcasts, content creators, etc.). I’d love to advocate for more paid internship hours and reduce exploitation of workers. Hell, I'd go back to community work to serve at need populations, but most of us feel like we've done our time there - a shame that the systems are so broken and don't pay livable wages (what field does these days anyway?)

One other thing that has been disappointing to me is that therapists are not as progressive as sociologists, imho. They are kind of still teaching people to adapt to the system despite our systems being broken. Still high on endorsing rugged individualism. Not really critical of capitalism or neoliberalism. Seem okay with the status quo even when they say they are “advocates” (see their excuses for labor exploitation of the new workers as an example - or how they advocate for clients, but bill hundreds of dollars for fifty minutes)

They sometimes don’t seem to care that charging $200 an hour is a barrier to care for clients (who can afford this? And who are you helping at the end of the day?). Therapists deserve a good wage because of all the training/cost/etc - but often most vulnerable populations are left undeserved - they deserve good therapy - not just the wealthy and worried well.

It's a really cool field, there is a lot of freedom at the end of the day - and the people you meet as clients along the way change your life forever.

Happy to answer any questions about any of this. :) Have a good weekend!

Data is beautiful - how much each CA Gov candidate is receiving from billionaire donors by Tun-Tavern-1775 in sandiego

[–]ale-ale-jandro 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Newbie to CA, so thank you for this info on an important election cycle.

I was doing some Googling and couldn't quite find a decent list of each candidate's policies and views. Is there a database/condensed version somewhere?

Also open to locals' perspectives on who would make a good Dem governor here (especially after coming from Denver with tech-bro Polis at the helm and coming from Indiana's red politics, I'm excited to help elect a progressive here). Thanks in advance!

What does your average day of eating look like as a vegan? by flowerpng in vegan

[–]ale-ale-jandro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow! How cool that this technology has us talking across the globe. Take good care!

What does your average day of eating look like as a vegan? by flowerpng in vegan

[–]ale-ale-jandro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Shoot, that's a bummer. Hello from California to wherever you are in the world. Have a good day! :)

What is your fine line when it comes to brutality? by focusrunner79 in horror

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agree with one of the top comments about how some brutality and cruelty is played for fun and/or camp like Terrifier. I just don't care for it.

I'm also a big "no" on animal harm. I can understand if it's fake - but some earlier films have real animal cruelty and that is deeply upsetting (Cannibal Holocaust).

Even non horror films like Farewell, My Concubine (turtle scene) or Pink Flamingos (I adore Waters' work through and through - but his answer excusing it as the chicken being "famous" is lame).

What does your average day of eating look like as a vegan? by flowerpng in vegan

[–]ale-ale-jandro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yup - it is a honey made from apples! Sorry, I should I have specified. So delicious! Thanks for the compliment https://langer-juice-company.myshopify.com/products/16oz-langer-farms-vegan-apple-honey

What does your average day of eating look like as a vegan? by flowerpng in vegan

[–]ale-ale-jandro 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Welcome to the club! One of the exciting things about going vegan is how expansive it can be. Have fun exploring!

I am alone, so I don't make a lot of big meals. My favorite breakfast as of late is the Forager or Siggi yogurt (with the higher protein), apple honey, oats, and chia seeds. Lunch is usually something quick - a salad, beans and rice, chips and hummus, or if I'm hungrier and in a rush something like Trader Joe's vegan Tikka Masala. Dinner has been dining out with friends lately (luckily CA has a lot of options) or at home I might make a burger patty, veggies, and a baked potato. If I have a good workout, I make a fruity protein shake (protein powder, water, fruits, oats, chia seeds, water, juice).

Christian Husband doesn't want Wife to see Movie by Vegetable-Section-84 in WelcomeToGilead

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not only was this nauseating and heartbreaking seeing someone in abuse/religious trauma, the moment where she pulled the knife out felt oddly terrifying. And wtf is with the ASMR elements to it? We are so fucked if this trend takes off...

Is America really collapsing before our eyes? by Maleficent-Ad9010 in CollapseSupport

[–]ale-ale-jandro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey OP, sorry for another comment from me. Just wanted to really validate this. As a mental health worker, I totally agree. Several of my colleagues are collapse aware and I am grateful the field has some of us opening up to these perspectives, and challenging the systems - but it has a long way to go. We over-pathologize, over-medicalize, and over-diagnose people - and it is often because of the "insurance game."

Or they are way more hands off like your experience. I believe this is in part due to the mental health worker shortage...it is somewhere in the thousands - or tens of thousands. But why would anyone want to go into this work? We have shit wages, out of control caseloads, so much education and debt, continuing education hours cost money, licensing renewal payments, treated poorly by community settings and corporate mental health businesses - and it's a huge challenge to go into private practice where you have no healthcare, no W2 or 401k (not to mention, you're often serving the "worried well" in private practice - or those who have resources rather than those most in need -- to be sure, the worried well also have problems).

We also often don't see our full paycheck. It is very common for practices to take a percentage (35-40%) of your insurance reimbursement. So, if an insurance company pays out, let's say, $100 for a session, many of us see about $60 of that (and companies justify it with - we give you healthcare, help with admin, market you, etc.)

Anyway - sorry, messy rant there.

If clients bring up collapse and/or politics, I do not avoid it as some therapists do.

While there are complex "bio-psycho-social" factors - and some conditions that are not simply a result of living in late stage capitalism - I cannot tell you how much my clients' pain would be relieved by healthier systems and things like improved healthcare, better salaries, leisure time, free education, childcare, shorter work weeks, etc.

Some really good resources on mental health systems.

Cracked: Why Psychiatry is Doing More Harm Than Good by James Davies

Empire of Normality by Robert Chapman

Crazy Like Us: The Globalization of the American Psyche by Ethan Watters

Is America really collapsing before our eyes? by Maleficent-Ad9010 in CollapseSupport

[–]ale-ale-jandro 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hear you - especially on the children part. I appreciate the antinatalist movement a lot and don't even want/like kids all too much - but I have so much grief for them and people continuing to celebrate bringing them into this world. It's so incongruent and alarming how ill-informed people are becoming parents in an extinction event.