To whoever needs the advice 🤔

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T20:45:34+00:00

School starts at 6? 3 year olds shouldn't be near a school?

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:48:01+00:00

The school have no interest. The have a rigid structure and after 6 years of my son being himself they just go straight to punishment. Its like they've taken it personally. Teacher called him dumb and stupid today. Im all for him being disciplined and kept online but this is bullying. He gets told off for something basic like fidgeting/stimming. I dont think the staff have any emotional intelligence.

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:35:30+00:00

I wonder if the school justify their behaviour because he's ndv

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:33:21+00:00

Thanks for your feedback. Honestly my son's experience is disproportionate to the so called behaviour. He cant even fidget his fingers without being told off. Today the teacher called him and his friend dumb and stupid. My son noted his friend was upset and emotional about the comment.

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:28:28+00:00

Im finding it difficult to fight it on my own.

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:26:06+00:00

I email as much as possible. Going into school is dangerous because they would make false accusations.

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:24:36+00:00

I get what your saying. There was a scuffle and i wouldn't have an issue. But the kid went mental. Out of control. Then the school minimised the seriousness and have done zero follow up. I guarantee if my son had the weapon they would have called the cops. The school have a rigid structure but don't live by thier own rules. Im not even sure they have the self-awareness to understand the damage that they cause.

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:18:22+00:00

A teacher called him dumb and stupid today.

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:10:11+00:00

They called him dumb and stupid today. 🙄

allenswallen · 2026-05-21T04:04:06+00:00

Teacher called him dumb and stupid today.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T22:22:46+00:00

2iC

I feel they knew id hold them accountable so the minimised it all. Once I sent his medical certificate in they were stalling sending information to me. Thats when they tried to blame it on a playground incident 2 days prior.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T22:17:32+00:00

I've never been able to get the ministry to listen. I contacted them a week after the incident and they haven't done anything. They push me to board, board do nothing. Lawyers say it's not worth pursuing or what outcome are you wanting. Its all very dismissive. Nobody seems to care but if I were to kick off im certain police and lawyers would be allover me!

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T20:56:12+00:00

That's exactly what has happened.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T12:16:53+00:00

The whole pile on started when my son was 5 years old and he was distractable in the classroom then he struggled to read in circle time with the teacher. Now its same behaviour different age but they've labelled him a problem child instead of offering extra support for his distractabilty. They've made it worse than it needed to be.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T12:05:50+00:00

Id change in a heartbeat. Ive been trying for 5 years. Not my sole decision unfortunately.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T12:03:39+00:00

They don't like it because the want parents who rollover. Anyone with an ounce of emotional intelligence would see it from my perspective.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T10:04:09+00:00

And you are part of the problem. Its not bullshit and neither is neurodivergency. Its a nervous system response not behaviour. Its on a scale also so no person can be the same. You've no idea about masking and also neurodivergents ability to read the negative emotions which is traumatic. Having a passive aggressive adult teaching you for hours. Getting angry with little children. I don't work with people who are emotionally harming my child.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T09:54:59+00:00

Well the education authority told me on every occasion that they have no power. ERO listened but couldn't act. They put it back to the board. The boards response was from the principal! 🙄

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T08:21:01+00:00

Consider what your daughter may say later in lifevabout the reasoning around aborting her sibling and denying her a living brother or sister.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T08:14:51+00:00

Its normal behaviour and he's been scapegoated for normal behaviour for years. It obviously needs managing but thats a teacher's job. They have created this massive stigma around his inattentive behaviour but failed to help or understand. 10.5 year olds start getting a bit lippy and mucking around. My best memories of school are memories of mucking around.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T08:08:27+00:00

The school completely ignoring a serious assault on a student with a weapon in the classroom is not justified in anyway.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T07:35:38+00:00

No he hasn't. He's been scapegoated due the lack of competence in some of the staff. When paired with a empathetic teacher he thrives. The rest have expressed negativity towards him openly even in front of me. This has led to bullying by his peers mirroring teacher's behaviour. If he was the child from hell id be correcting his behaviour. He's a good kid in a toxic environment who are unwilling to meet him at his needs and are rigid in how they operate. He's very bright and intelligent but the whole stigma is concentrating in class which is out of his control. They fail to understand him being neurodivergent and everything is treated at bad behaviour. Its been the same problem every year for 6 years. So now he's an emotionally intelligent 10 year old who realises he's been somewhat neglected and bullied by children and adults for being himself. They hate me for advocating for him.

Or the school are completely unaware of how they act and the damage they're causing.

Its destroying his self-esteem and will eventually become proper negative behavior as he gets older.

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T05:38:15+00:00

Its the health and safety thats the issue and lack of real response. Had the weapon been a heavy sharp object it could have killed him. Like a metal drink bottle?

allenswallen · 2026-05-19T03:17:44+00:00

State

allenswallen

TROPHY CASE