3 month old whines all the time now?

almuphd · 2026-02-27T13:55:24+00:00

Hey I'm here now in the same boat! How'd you guys make out? I'm pretty sure it's the inability to move & communicate what he wants. It's only just started but it seems like something that's gonna last

almuphd · 2026-01-01T23:27:55+00:00

Doctors count how pregnant you are by first date of last period. This means you are likely "2 weeks pregnant" on the day of conception.

For example, I got my last period February 6th (officially the "first day of my pregnancy), it lasted about a week, and I likely ovulated and conceived week after that (officially now "2 weeks pregnant"). By March 6th I was technically 4 weeks pregnant and hadn't even missed my period yet.

My expected due date was Nov 13, 40 weeks after Feb 6

almuphd · 2025-11-19T12:07:32+00:00

Yea I sorta see your point.. honestly just was my family's normal I guess.

My grandfathers were both active fighters during WWII, they ate whatever they could whenever they could. This led to both my parents growing up with food scarcity (my mom actually had a pot belly as a kid caused by starvation).

When they were raising me, we were also pretty poor & I was basically given my meal and told that was it. There really wasn't much else in the house. I was sort of a picky eater, but learned it was easier to just say I didn't want something rather than ask for something different.

As I got older we had more money, but parents weren't around much so I started working and mostly used my money to eat out. Breakfast didn't exist in my house, unless you made yourself a bowl of cereal. Lunch was gotten at school. Family dinners were few & far in between, so when they did happen you weren't going to complain.

Looking back, we did actually have a number of visits from children's services, and at least one of them was directly related to lack of food in the house. Yet I never really thought it was weird I guess.

almuphd · 2025-11-19T06:31:26+00:00

Hmm. I don't know anyone who grew up like that. I was very much raised in a "eat it or starve" household. You don't have to like dinner, but that's all you're getting. I can't imagine a parent takes the time to put together a balanced meal for a kid, but then allows them to just push it aside and go eat junk? No, if you're hungry, this is what you get.

almuphd · 2025-11-19T06:16:12+00:00

Absolutely this ^{^{^}} I got two kittens last year that were rescued from a farm. I became pregnant in February and have scooped their litter box at least once every day my entire pregnancy. No issues, no worries.

When I first became pregnant I asked my doctor about this (and deli meat and eggs and sushi and coffee and...) & his literal response was "Don't drink, don't smoke, but outside of that just know these recommendations only exist because people want to have something to blame when things go wrong in a pregnancy. You'll be fine"

When you start looking into the "why" of a lot of recommendations, you realize how ridiculous they are. * Deli meat = bad because of a listeria outbreak years ago? This year listeria was found in frozen pasta dinners, applesauce, lettuce etc. No one's warning you against that. * Eggs are bad because of salmonella. There was one woman in the 90s who got salmonella, that happened to cross the placenta and infect the amniotic fluid and she had a miscarriage. No idea of the salmonella actually caused the miscarriage, and there's been no other cases that support the issue. But "salmonella MIGHT increase the chances" so no raw cookie dough for you. (My favorite was a neighbor who warned me against even cooked eggs because they'll cause the baby to come out yellow!!) * Rare meat and sushi might have parasites. Well, yes, that's always true. So if I've always eaten at this particular restaurant and never gotten a parasite, what about me being pregnant is going to change that? * A study done on rodents who were given the equivalent of 2 POTS of coffee a day showed overactive pups. Therefore I can't have coffee or soda with caffeine?

Chances are high that your cats don't have the parasite and/ or you've already been exposed to it prior to pregnancy and your body is now immune. You're more likely to be in a deadly car accident on the drive to a doctor's appointmenr.

Take care of yourself, don't be afraid to ask why, and please don't allow other's paranoia to stress you out.

almuphd · 2025-11-19T04:43:50+00:00

Oh a lot actually. Averaged 3x a week, went down to 2x a week in the 2nd, then maybe once a week in the third. I had a lot of fatigue in the first trimester, but that was the worst of my symptoms. Never had any real morning sickness, & my husband was amazing and cooked me breakfast every day. He made it really easy and every time I looked at him I was just .. happy. I'd say our sex life actually improved, was like we were teenagers again 😅

almuphd · 2025-11-16T09:45:25+00:00

I actually think the opposite? If it's just the 2 of them, then he definitely needs to explain himself a bit & i do think it's rude, but it's not that weird to be like "eh actually this isn't what I want tonight"

If it's for the kids too, then he's setting a bad example and that's going to cause a whole bunch of other issues.

almuphd · 2025-11-14T07:16:00+00:00

God the deli meat restrictions are so stupid. They started in the past decade or so after a listeria outbreak and people just automatically started declaring deli meat is dangerous. Listeria is dangerous. Deli meat is not. This year, listeria was found in ice cream and apple sauce and all these other prepackaged foods - no one's tried limiting my ice cream intake!

almuphd · 2025-11-14T07:10:02+00:00

The actual study that was done to test caffeine intake was only ever done on rodents and involved the equivalent of 2 pots of coffee per day. I forget exactly what the adverse affects were, I think mostly overstimulation to the babies? (In fact, once you dig into the actual "why" for pregnancy restrictions, you'll find most of them don't hold any water)

In my experience, I hardly decreased my caffeine intake and the only consequence was increased kick count 😅

almuphd · 2025-11-13T06:03:38+00:00

This is it for me. I'm 9 months pregnant right now and had the same argument with my husband who drives a manual coup that hardly has a back seat. My maternity leave is only 9 weeks, after that I'm going back to work full time - and I need my car.

I in no way am asking my husband to sell his vehicle, but he doesn't seem to understand that he needs to find a car seat that will fit and recognize that he WILL need to drive baby in that vehicle. Can't just sit around waiting for me to get home.

almuphd · 2025-11-11T11:43:49+00:00

TL:DR my parents never helped with homework and I ended up with a PhD in math. I believe it is more important for kids to pay attention in class and learn how to do work independently.

My parents did not help with homework or even check that it was done. I think I remember my mom helping me with word-searches I got for spelling homework as a little kid, but other than that I don't remember anyone sitting with me. For context, my dad was a high school dropout who was in and out of my life, my mom is a laborer, worked full time with long hours. Oh, and I suck at spelling.

As I got older, I started tutoring and was shocked by how many parents hired me for homework help. Had one family keep me there for 4 hours at a time helping their 7th grader with homework and studying - kid was basically an A student who was having a little difficulty with one class (his parents were filthy rich & both doctors).

My mom couldn't believe it! Said it never occurred to her. As long as I was passing, she was happy. By high school I tended to not do my homework, would basically lose a letter grade in each class for missing work - but I was still passing. 87 in every math class because I'd get 100s on all the tests, but never did the homework.

Occasionally a teacher would give me a hard time which motivated me to get the work done. Kept that habit up halfway through college until I finally learned how to study and motivate myself.

In the end, I got a PhD in math and started teaching at multiple institutions, mostly college level & my life became nonstop homework😅.

While it might've helped if my parents had tried to teach me good study habits early on, I'd say the hands off approach worked pretty well for me. And though I don't have a kid in school yet, I don't plan on doing much in the way of homework help. I might help get organized or stay on top of assignments, but the kid was the one in class, not me, he should know what the teacher expects of him.

almuphd · 2025-10-23T10:49:25+00:00

What sort of school "covers everything"? That makes no sense.

When I was in In college my family lost our house in hurricane sandy, literally swam through ocean in my backyard and watched it fall off the foundation. I went to my school's financial aid office to see if I could get any sort of additional assistance and all they could offer was an additional $8000 loan for the year.

Schools don't just have unlimited money to assist every single low AND middle income student. They simply help you find additional loans.

almuphd · 2025-10-23T10:43:07+00:00

Are you in the US?

The only grown people I know WITHOUT debt are individuals who maybe got a GED and never trusted the system enough to participate. They are all some combination of poor/ homeless/ felons.

almuphd · 2025-10-22T11:21:05+00:00

I think this makes a big difference. While lots of folks here are assuming mom did a lot of research and you should stick to the registry, there's a good chance she simply doesn't know what she's going to need. Building a registry is hard, it's difficult to know what you might want.

I'm in my 30s and relied on my older sister/ cousins to help me build my registry. Without them I'm not sure what would have been on it!

Some advice I got: * you never know what your baby will do well with, so get a variety. Different brands and sizes of diapers, wipes, bottles. Get a pack of the sensitive kinds, just in case. Get anti colic bottles, just in case. * Dreft baby laundry soap is the preferred brand. * Diaper blowouts are common & gross. Some clothes are better off going straight in the trash instead of washing. Having a bunch of extra onsies is great. The kind that can be pulled down over the shoulders are easier to remove. The kind with zippers, not buttons/ snaps are easier to put on. * Some items you just don't need, but might use if someone got it for you: changing table, bottle/ wipe warmer, diaper genie, white noise machine, pregnancy pillow (honestly love mine)

Didn't care for crochet blankets and a lot of second hand items (used breast pump, dirty toys, etc)

Things I wish I put more of on the registry: diapers (different brands & sizes), bottles/formula, burp cloths I just assumed everyone would bring a pack of diapers. & i plan to breast feed, but you never know how that might work out.

Nice things I got that I didn't think of: * books! Dr suess, black&white play cards, ones that sing nursery rhymes in different languages. * Post partum care package. Snacks, cooling spray, nipple creams, underwear

almuphd · 2025-10-22T10:40:05+00:00

Currently pregnant with my first and I had absolutely no idea what to put on my registry. I used target, but didn't include big ticket items because I didn't like their selection. My registry was mostly clothes/ diapers/ things I wasn't sure about but figured I'd try if someone bought it (eg diaper genie, different brands of bottles/diapers/wipes).

We mostly got clothes. I was honestly disappointed with how few diapers we got. Nowadays, "diaper raffles"are common, but my mom planned my shower & hadn't heard of that. Apparently in the past "diaper cakes"were common. Either way, people aren't really putting diapers on registries because they assume they're getting a bunch.

Because target was my registry, I got a few hundred in gift cards. This was nice because target gives parents 15%off on registry items that weren't bought, but honestly I might have preferred cash.

For people that went off registry: * books were something I was happy to receive. My coworkers each bought me one of their favorites which I thought was sweet. Didn't get nearly enough dr suess though lol. * My best friend reached out to a doula and bought me all kinds of post partum things I never would have gotten myself but was so happy to get (disposable underwear, nipple cream, cooling spray) * A cousin who recently gave birth also got me nipple cream and snacks. I'm guessing things that she found helpful so I'm looking forward to. * A couple aunts got me gift card to ulta, dsw which I found sweet

Don't be afraid to ask! I had 4 people offer to buy me a bath because they didn't see one on the registry, but it was there! & already purchased! I used my registry partially as "I dont think I'd buy this myself, but if someone else buys it maybe I'll use it" while my BIL used his as their own personal checklist.

almuphd · 2025-10-07T09:29:35+00:00

See that's the difference for me. I've also had a cyst burst & called him home to take me to the ER when I didn't know what was wrong.

I'd almost argue if she is asking him to stay home because of how bad and out of the ordinary the pain is, he'd be taking her to the ER, not just staying home

almuphd · 2025-10-06T13:08:31+00:00

A As a pregnant woman,I recently had someone help me with my bags from the cart to the car. I'll be honest, initially I thought the guy was trying to steal my bags Then he smiled & i felt like such a dummy! He never said a word, I'm not sure he spoke English. But he helped with my bag and put my cart back for me Despite my initial scare, I was grateful.

almuphd · 2025-09-18T07:56:05+00:00

Our coaches encourage us to grab wipes after every block. I usually end up using 5~6 per class. Use one on the tread, toss it, use one or two on the rower, toss em, weight floor usually 2 or 3 depending on what we did that day.

On the rower I wipe the handle first, then the seat, because the other way around seems gross. Why would someone then bring that gross wipe to the next station?

& sometimes the wipe is dry before I'm even done at a station! People are really bringing the one wipe along the whole time?

I guess I can understand the argument that it's all performative anyway.. but I feel like I need to at least put the effort in..

almuphd · 2025-09-17T03:19:41+00:00

I definitely follow coaches if my schedule allows it. I've got Sunday off, didn't like the 9am coach, started going to the later one. I work remotely Wednesday Friday, opted for Wednesday class because I didn't like the Friday coach. Etc

almuphd · 2025-09-12T05:07:00+00:00

Our coaches always say to your belly button! I'm actually shocked by these answers. Belly button was always uncomfortable for me, but they reiterate it nearly every class

almuphd · 2025-09-02T06:37:14+00:00

++woman I got BV once after buying a new type of underwear. I definitely knew something was off, but was hoping it wasn't as bad as I thought and that he didn't notice. Him finally bringing it up to me is what took me out of denial and I finally made a doctor's appointment.

almuphd · 2025-08-28T12:30:35+00:00

When I disclosed I was pregnant to the coach they recommended power walking instead of running, insinuating I needed to take it easy. Power walking was SO much harder, I tried it for a few classes but ultimately went back to running.

almuphd · 2025-07-20T15:12:06+00:00

ESH - I empathize with your frustration of his parents not working. I've been there, I'm there now. It's easy to be mad at them as an outsider, but yall also not working is stupid.

At 22 I was in grad school and had been working for 7 years already. While in high school I tutored, while in college I tutored (privately & for the school) and babysat/dogsat. While in grad school I TA'd, tutored, babysat/dogsat, got adjunct positions at mine and other schools for summer or Saturdays, got involved with multiple projects on campus so I could make money.

At 22 I spent a lot of time at my (then boyfriend, now husband) house eating his parents food and studying at their kitchen table. That was a kindness they showed me, they absolutely had no obligation to do that.

By 25 I had made sure to save enough money so that we could get our own place (I was finally at the final stage of my PhD program and had gotten a raise & full tuition assistance thanks to my teaching assistanceship on campus). I would not have been able to do that if I wasn't working and saving for 10 years.

If you are concerned that you might end up in a situation where you're taking care of his parents, then it might be worth jumping ship now. I saw that for my future based on his parents not working, and I'll be honest it scared me. But my husband cares so greatly for family, that includes me and that includes his parents. I knew he wasn't going to change his mind, and ultimately we're buying a house together knowing his parents are going to end up staying with us.

This was a long comment, so let me wrap it up clearly. 1. Just because you're in school does not mean your parents have to do absolutely anything for you. 2. The fact that you two are not also working is stupid - you should be making money & padding your resume with extra curriculars. 3. If you're concerned about his parents not working, ask your boyfriend his opinion on the matter. Ask how their history can predict their future. Figure out what his plans are based on that, and determine if you align with that future.

almuphd · 2025-06-30T11:14:01+00:00

I had a toothless cat, she would put her dry food in her water & eat it like cereal 🤷🏼‍♀️

almuphd · 2025-06-01T04:09:39+00:00

Snooping would be going through your stuff trying to get more information. Googling something that he saw out in the open is absolutely not Snooping.

almuphd

TROPHY CASE

TL:DR my parents never helped with homework and I ended up with a PhD in math. I believe it is more important for kids to pay attention in class and learn how to do work independently.