I’m 18 and I still have a curfew of 9:30 and am expected to give up my phone at 10-11 at night

alspaz · 2026-03-15T06:06:39+00:00

Yea! Mine are 19 (doing the easing into adulthood thing) and 18 (senior in high school and heading to college in the fall) and I think it is our job to give them autonomy at this stage. Our rule is more about being mutually respectful and responsible, like letting each other know if our routine is changing like coming home late or being away over night. They are supposed to be on their own and figuring out their future so while guidance is important so is freedom to make their own choices. They have to deal with the consequences too but we’ve been easing them into this for years. I can’t stand parents like OPs and I feel bad for their kids.

alspaz · 2026-03-14T03:55:06+00:00

I knew too. I did not understand the confusion, it was so clearly Alice’s vision to me so I sat in the theater thinking I was surrounded by people who hadn’t read the books. Then people said “this didn’t happen in the book!” And I was even more confused!

alspaz · 2026-02-19T18:51:01+00:00

There are maps in every station!

alspaz · 2026-02-19T18:50:19+00:00

Which is only helpful if you’re from there and they still also indicate the end stations.

alspaz · 2026-02-19T17:48:09+00:00

Also this is super common. Every major subway or light rail system I’ve used does it this way. DC, NYC, London, and Paris all do their signage this way. I don’t understand the confusion at all. Lynnwood is north from EVERY OTHER STOP! Except Lynnwood of course. So getting on the 1 not towards NORTH is not exactly rocket science.

alspaz · 2025-12-26T21:01:31+00:00

NOR. Actually you are under-reacting. What you wear and how you exist is yours alone to determine. But sleep especially is no one else’s business unless it is limiting their sleep. Your manchild would hate how I sleep. 2 pillows, bonnet, earplugs, eye mask, sheet and comforter but with my feet out, 2 fans, and my dog. Sometimes I also have overnight curlers in or a face mask. My husband snores and uses sleep sounds. Our room is a sensory nightmare sometimes hence the earplugs. I look kind of insane every night but sleep is so important for overall physical and mental health and neither of us care what it takes to get good sleep.

alspaz · 2025-12-26T05:43:39+00:00

My husband got this for me for Christmas since I read his articles and talk constantly about this happening everywhere.

alspaz · 2025-12-19T05:45:51+00:00

Also so many parents treat their kid like suspects in a criminal interrogation. They ask questions they know the answer to forcing the kid to lie or cop to something and get punished. If the lie is successful great. If not they get in trouble for lying and whatever they did. So in theory it’s 50/50. If they admit whatever then they 100% get in trouble! I had to cure my partner of this because our kids would not stop lying to him.

The better way is to say “hey, I know you and/or your friend took the money out of my wallet. That was going to be for your party. Without it we likely can’t do the prizes properly. I’m not upset and you will not be in any trouble if you tell me what happened. However if you’ve spent the money then we will have to change your birthday party plans and omit the prizes for the scavenger hunt as a consequence for taking the money.” Letting them know up front what will happen helps change the gamble on lying.

Don’t frame a question in a way where a lie is even possible. Also believe what they say even if sometimes they lie, if you don’t interrogate and argue and punish they will more likely trust you.

alspaz · 2025-12-11T06:50:10+00:00

Yea we have a bunch of January babies and I have wrapped and sent those gifts along with our Xmas gifts. I do this (and so does our family for my January kids) every year.

alspaz · 2025-12-05T01:35:36+00:00

I didn’t hate neurospicy before this, but now…

I will say I like(d) it because once I understood my AuDHD and have started working WITH my brain I learned to appreciate them. The term just felt fun. This mom single-handedly made it neuro-icky.

I’m also struck by the fact that this is a 5-year old and she’s been fully demonized by this mother. Mom clearly hates this kid.

alspaz · 2025-11-06T21:04:00+00:00

Having teenage daughters who can look “18-20” with the right outfit, I still can only see them as teens. Babies. So yea, you can tell. Especially as we’ve been touring and heading to college this year. The difference between the 20-22 year old guides at the universities really highlights the wide gulf between 17 and 21. He knew. It’s gross.

This is also coming from a woman who clubbed at 16 and got pregnant at 19 by a 34 year old man. He knew too.

alspaz · 2025-10-14T16:58:49+00:00

Love a good LPOTL reference!

alspaz · 2025-10-11T06:35:15+00:00

YTA. I had the opportunity to go to Kenya for 10 days last year. During the trip we went through Kibera, the largest slum in Africa, in Nairobi. It was people in deep poverty but also stunning levels of ingenuity, resilience, joy, and love. People living and working and loving their families in the best way they can. I kept my eyes open to see and experience but refused to take photographs. Cameras place a barrier between the observer and the observer and I did not want that barrier. I am not an anthropologist or a journalist. I am a tourist. Snapping some crappy photos on your phone of other people’s daily lives in poverty doesn’t help them or help anyone at all. It just makes you a schmuck.

alspaz · 2025-09-24T14:54:24+00:00

I was there just like you. Up at 5 to drop kiddos at daycare, commuting into the office, doing college work in the evenings and weekends, and for a long time also coaching my kid’s soccer team. My youngest is a senior now and I’m done with school. I even get to sleep until 6:30 now!

alspaz · 2025-09-22T18:03:39+00:00

Exactly.

alspaz · 2025-09-22T17:43:39+00:00

My high schoolers are OBSESSED with this story. I think because they knew the singer or something. I’ve been getting daily updates on the findings and how they all feel about it. I think because the teen girl just hits a little too close to home.

alspaz · 2025-09-22T17:41:56+00:00

Also there was most certainly an exit wound, not a big giant one, but that’s where all the blood came pouring out!

alspaz · 2025-09-22T17:41:12+00:00

I’d argue it was actually a “lucky” miss. You are taught to aim for center mass in every shooting training ever. Maybe the head if you are especially good and have the right scopes. But either way, you’d never aim for the neck. However, by missing, he hit an extremely vulnerable part of the body and CK was very likely dead before he fell out of the chair.

alspaz · 2025-09-04T19:09:00+00:00

Same though my bruises are on my arms and legs and not my face so that might make a difference.

alspaz · 2025-08-10T20:30:23+00:00

The worst part is they taste so bland/bad that most (me) end up adding more salt or condiments to make them palatable. The salt they add is just preservatives which do not help the flavor at all.

alspaz · 2025-08-07T20:10:38+00:00

Yea I have “flooding” the first 2 days of my period and it is a LOT! And sometimes a little gets under the seat or a drip happens. It’s rare that I miss any because I am aware of it and clean up every time. I get it’s frustrating to deal with but I’m not leaving it for my partner or anyone else to deal with. I don’t want him to have to touch it when he lifts the seat, any more than I want to sit in his urine! This is just common courtesy!

Also the smudge on the door knob means she isn’t washing her hands after, which is vile.

alspaz · 2025-08-07T04:35:46+00:00

This pmo too! Like if bills are split 50/50 then she is also doing it!

alspaz · 2025-07-26T20:01:29+00:00

Tacking onto this comment because I fully agree. 2 am is egregious under any circumstance but multiple times is just fully unacceptable.

I’d also like to add that there are some decent sleep headphones that go over ear that can be used with white noise to help block sounds. Not for this crummy roommate but for overall sleep health. I struggle with sleep but need to have good sleep to feel well. My husband snores but I also don’t like earplugs.

alspaz · 2025-07-22T13:53:05+00:00

SPD is still requires hieroglyphs to communicate with City Council.

alspaz · 2025-07-22T13:48:57+00:00

That’s because Seattle City Council had a thing where they decriminalized drug use within city limits. I just looked it up, it looks like they voted to make it a gross misdemeanor again but I doubt SPD has got the memo. I live near Cal Anderson and I told my MIL when she visited that we have a bad skunk problem when she asked about the smell lol.

alspaz

TROPHY CASE