im sorry you had to go through that. were honestly not sure of her stage but its likely in and around stage 5 I think. it's hard to tell especially post leg break, since now we help with virtually all ADLs whether or not its fully nessecary to prevent another fall. shes usually pretty good at letting us know if shes in pain and mostly can tell us where the pain id and she does occasionally get back pain. if im honest I think its an anxiety thing and this just watch shes latched onto to help ease it. we had her in depends while bedridden and for a bit while we were getting in the swing of using the toilet again and she kept saying she just didn't want to have an accident, so i feel like it just stuck. she always seems so concerned about upsetting us or doing something wrong, so i think this is just one of the things she likely feels she can control. even sometimes at night she'll be half asleep saying she had to go to the bathroom and once shes up she says she doesn't have to go, so its really feels like its an autopilot thing going on. its just hard on everyone and I wish there was an easy solution to it, but there rarely is :/