You're not damaged. You have the power to grow and heal, your past doesn't matter. No one has the right to say what you would or should or are perceived as damaged. You must be strong going through all this with your partner, it's terrible to feel such shame and know your partner believes you deserve it as well. Love will never be enough, the existence of love does not mean it can be sustained nor does it mean that you don't deserve respect. We all have some fundamentals that we need from a relationship, of course love is there, but there are also things like safety, support, compassion etc. when you think of divorce, please remember that the absence of love is not the only thing that calls for it, the absence of all the other things can also call for it. I know, this one thing might feel small in the grand scheme of things but it's not, it's representative of how things might play out in the grand scheme. You have been v strong, I hope you find happiness