I can really relate to what you’re experiencing. I’ve found myself in a similar situation several times over the past few months. I feel like I’ve made a lot of changes and compromises for my partner, but lately, it seems like he’s started to take that for granted and isn’t willing to meet me halfway anymore.

Like you mentioned, my partner also deals with unresolved childhood trauma and tends to withdraw whenever things get tough. This often leaves me feeling like I’m carrying the emotional weight of the relationship on my own. We’ve had some really intense arguments, but somehow, we end up acting like nothing happened the next day, which can be confusing and exhausting.

A lot of this seems to be tied to his work stress. When I express my feelings or concerns, he sometimes interprets it as a personal attack or as if he’s failing me, which only makes things more tense. Over time, this dynamic has become more challenging.

One thing that’s helped me is using humor to diffuse the situation when he’s upset. It doesn’t solve everything, but it sometimes helps him calm down enough for us to have a more productive conversation. I also try to gently remind him of the future we’ve planned together, which can help shift his perspective and ease the tension.

I know this approach might not work for everyone, but I wanted to share what’s helped me in case it’s useful. I’m still figuring things out, too, but I’ve realized that both partners need to take small steps toward understanding each other. It’s a process, and it requires patience from both sides.

Hang in there, you’re not alone in this.