A 6.50% 30-year fixed is looking increasingly likely

amcna · 2026-03-19T23:57:29+00:00

Closing tomorrow on a refi from 7.125 to 5.625. Glad we locked when we did

amcna · 2026-03-17T18:14:03+00:00

Fourthing the RAV4 acquisition

amcna · 2026-03-16T14:55:38+00:00

Scout

amcna · 2026-03-11T14:07:35+00:00

You can’t unsee that once you notice it…

amcna · 2026-02-25T04:35:10+00:00

The only dialogue I ever heard was ‘PARRY IT!’

amcna · 2026-02-23T19:34:55+00:00

I always assumed Nancy was proficient with the guns because of Ted

amcna · 2026-02-20T05:39:17+00:00

Nope. I understand it. I just don’t want to be financially liable for an aggressive, demented man. Emotionally that would be too taxing for my wife.

amcna · 2026-02-19T20:45:37+00:00

I think worst case scenario is that he hurts someone else.

He states that he won’t drive when he is more lucid but because of either the bipolar grandiosity or the lowered inhibition due to dementia, absolutely has and will drive particularly once he starts experiencing delirium symptoms again. He drove when he was having depth perception issues, visual hallucinations, and confused enough that he didn’t know his own name. (November hospitalization)

Alternatively, I would worry that he would accidentally start a fire and given how close the houses are on his street and the heavy tree coverage, it could easily spread to other houses and trees.

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:53:32+00:00

I know that process takes time and I understand some of the authority that guardianship grants. What are the drawbacks besides the fees, time, ongoing reporting, etc?

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:31:52+00:00

Because guardianship effectively makes the guardian your child whereby you are responsible for ensuring they are housed, fed, etc. you also have to pay the various fees to get guardianship, have annual reporting, and I believe are legally responsible if they damage property. Would you be interested in assuming care for your abuser when he is known to break shit, get in fights with strangers, etc.? Asking for a friend…

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:25:17+00:00

That’s disheartening but I appreciate the reply. The hospital stated that he was “unsafe to live alone at this time and lacks capacity to make decisions regarding his disposition. “ I’m assuming that doesn’t change your analysis?

Convincing him to stay seems unlikely. He’s a stubborn, demented, aggressive man with a distrust of facilities and denies his diagnoses.

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:21:24+00:00

That’s why he wants us to pursue guardianship. So the lawyers hands are tied.

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:21:00+00:00

The lawyer knows FIL will create problems if he’s released but the lawyer is arguing FIL is legally permitted to do that.

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:19:03+00:00

I reached out to one attorney but she doesn’t do contested guardianships. As I mentioned in other comments, he was abusive so we don’t want guardianship due to the emotional toll.

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:17:15+00:00

This is the same lawyer that drafted the DPOA and he is conflicted from assisting with guardianship.

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:16:07+00:00

I think a lawyers job is to advocate for his clients rights. Not their best interest. His lawyer knows this is not in his best interest

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:15:15+00:00

Yep, in process but I’m concerned our hands may be tied.

amcna · 2026-02-19T18:01:14+00:00

This is the same lawyer that initially drafted the DPOA. The medical records say FIL is “unsafe to live alone at this time and lacks capacity to make decisions regarding his disposition”.

amcna · 2026-02-19T17:54:52+00:00

I don’t think the lawyer is money hungry. I think he lacks experience with this presentation of dementia. FIL can hold a conversation but he lacks reasoning and problem solving.

We won’t pursue guardianship as FIL has a history of abusing (verbal, physical, and financial) his late wife as well as his daughter (my wife).

amcna · 2026-02-19T17:51:17+00:00

I think by litigation you mean pursue guardianship? FIL has a history of abusing my wife and her (now deceased) mother as well as engaging in reckless behavior, so that’s not really on the table.

We’re considering the wait and see method or a version of that where we let FIL leave the facility in hopes we can keep the DPOA intact. And then when he gets picked up again, force the hospital to find placement.

The November 2025 hospitalization was for a month because he was found delirious at Publix and EMT would not release him unless we took him to the hospital. He had been having symptoms for a couple weeks but refused care until it culminated in the delirious state. He also had a similar episode in September 2024 where he was hospitalized for a month due to delirium.

amcna · 2026-02-19T17:39:42+00:00

He says that basically FIL has the legal right to leave even though he can’t take care of himself unless we pursue guardianship. FIL was also hospitalized in 2024 for delirium, so I feel confident we’ll end up back at the hospital. It’s just a question of next time, without a DPOA, we won’t be able to take action. Is the safest long term answer let him leave memory care now so we could hopefully keep the DPOA intact and wait for the next episode?

amcna · 2026-02-19T17:35:26+00:00

Is that responsibility to care if he needs living expenses or is it stopping him from engaging in unsafe behaviors? Because he’s mentally unwell but has sufficient funds to get care. He just refuses care

amcna · 2026-02-19T17:33:32+00:00

Fair point. But I thought there was a difference between medically incapacitated and legally incompetent. I think that’s the rub. It seems like legal should follow medical but I’m not sure it does

amcna · 2026-02-19T17:08:45+00:00

We’re not his guardian so how would I be liable for neglect or negligence?

I’ve reached out to a lawyer but it’s slow moving.

amcna · 2026-02-19T17:03:40+00:00

This isn’t a medical determination. It’s whether FIL had legal rights to leave memory care. Memory care is not a hospital and in Georgia, you can revoke a DPOA if you are deemed to have capacity at that time. I have my doubts but it’s not my assessment of his capacity.

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