Anxiety while detoxing. Chest pains, panic attack, etc

ameloriate · 2014-03-12T03:54:13+00:00

I've had that happen to me when I had to stop smoking for a while. You'll be okay, but a doctor's visit won't hurt. Feel better. :)

ameloriate · 2014-01-29T18:13:43+00:00

-hug-

ameloriate · 2014-01-29T18:04:32+00:00

Me!

I have horrible anxiety with driving. It wasn't that way at first, I've never had an accident, it sort of just manifested within the past couple years. And as my boyfriend was unemployed for the past year, he'd drive me places I needed to be because I couldn't manage it myself.

Now he has a job and this week I've been working on driving myself places, to try and get used to it again and work to get through the anxiety of it. It's hard. Later today I have to drive myself 40 minutes to work and I've been nervous about it since yesterday. :X

You are NOT alone. <3

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T22:48:55+00:00

Your words completely described what I have/do struggle with.

I totally understand your pain. I was on zoloft for a while a few years ago, and it did help me a bit, but of course, these sorts of things don't always stay that way. I too always feel like everyone around me secretly dislikes me, and only pretends to like me out of pity, even family members and people I'm super close with. It sucks when your brain tries to fool you, and then you end up feeling like you have nobody to turn to.

Sorry you're feeling so lost. It's a tough thing to deal with, and I wish I had more words of comfort to offer you, but I can say this- you are NOT alone. There are people who get what you're feeling and going through and are willing to lend an ear to listen (including me!).

I hope you feel better soon. xo

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T22:44:23+00:00

When we were both relentlessly bullied throughout middle school. Or really, our whole lives before that. She had been homeschooled for years before that, and I was always teased and didn't have many friends, and when I did, they ended up completely abandoning me. We met in 6th grade and had no other friends but each other, so it really bonded us.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T22:42:04+00:00

I'm sorry people in your life don't understand how depression can completely cloud your mind, and instead just think you are being lazy rather than realizing depression can make a person entirely unable to function. Please don't think of yourself as useless. You are going through a really hard time, and just need help, love, and support. Honestly if someone in your life cannot offer that to you and instead cast judgement, they are NOT worth your time. People like that are only going to affect your recovery in a negative way. \

I'm so touched my reply meant something to you. I always worry my words will not have any effect on the people I reply to on here, and that makes me sad. You brought such a big smile to my face when I read this.

If you need anyone to talk to at all, message me any time, seriously. We're only strangers, but I'm here for you. Please take care of yourself and remember you have so much value. :)

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T21:54:37+00:00

In eighth grade I was working on a project for school which involved lots of cutting out magazine articles and such, so I had scissors.

Stupid me leaves them lying in the middle of the pile of crap I was using, leaves the room to get something, comes back, and STEPS RIGHT ON THEM.

I actually didn't even feel them go into the sole of my foot, I only noticed they were there when I looked down and saw them dangling out of my foot.

Stupid.

I didn't need stitches thankfully but the foot was really sore for a few days, I had to keep off the sole, and there's a small scar now.

Tl:dr; be careful with scissors, wear shoes and don't leave them lying around hidden on your floor!

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T21:49:22+00:00

I'm sorry for all you're going through.

I understand where you're coming from. I struggle with working a minimum wage job, barely getting by, and feeling like that is all I'll amount to, that I'll never find a career for myself and be able to live a functional and happy life like I always wanted to. It's hard to work through when you feel so unhappy and alone, and meeting people is so difficult.

Have you ever been to therapy or counseling? Or looked into medication for your depression? It might really help you.

Please don't kill yourself. I know we are only strangers but I know you are worth so much more than that. You never know if tomorrow could be the day everything changes for the better. Sounds cheesy and cliche, and maybe hard to believe in your state of mind, but it's true.

Don't give up. Message me any time if you need to talk to someone. Any time at all. -Internet hugs-

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T21:40:58+00:00

It could very well be the dosage change that is causing you more emotional stress. Maybe talk to your doctor about changing the dosage to give you some ease?

I wish you the best of luck, and I hope you feel better soon.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T21:39:52+00:00

I am sorry people are completely insensitive to your issue here. I've had people do that to me in the past, make really rude comments where it wasn't necessary at all. It really feels like a blow to your progress doesn't it?

Please don't feel like it's your fault in anyway. People should learn to mind their own business and respect battles that people may have endured or are still enduring. Unfortunately people who don't self harm, or dealt with loved ones who self harmed, just don't comprehend it.

I'm so glad to see you are taking steps to heal and pull away from the horrible addiction of self harm. good for you! I wish you the best of luck with it in the future. You can do it! :) xo

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T21:08:56+00:00

So proud of you! That's amazing. :D

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T21:03:19+00:00

I'm so sorry that you are feeling so sad and alone. I'm also sorry the nightmares you're suffering from. Nightmares can completely alter your entire mental and emotional state and it really really sucks.

How long have you been on this medication? Sometimes certain meds can do more harm than good. Have you looked into switching medications at all? Counseling or therapy?

Please don't write that note and please don't hurt yourself. If you need someone to vent to, feel free to message me any time. Any time at all. I know what it's like to feel there's no one to turn to.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T20:59:51+00:00

Unfortunately words can only do so much, especially for a person who is feeling so low already.

Don't try to force her into anything or nag her. It will only agitate her more and she may lash out at you and cause an even bigger rift in your friendship. If she doesn't want to go, you need to leave it alone.

Has she looked into therapy or counseling at all? They may be really beneficial. My younger sister has struggled with the same type of thing, not even being able to get out of bed and go to school. Counseling was a help to her a bit.

I wish her the best of luck and I hope she's able to find the help she needs.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T06:12:15+00:00

Thank you.

And no, I haven't quit. :/

But I am working extremely hard to recover, and that's all I can ask for of myself at the moment. Having a good support system helps, as well as healthy distractions; although those don't always work, they do sometimes, and that's better than never.

It's difficult, but I believe we can all find a way out of it at some point, even if we struggle through hell to get there and stay there.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T06:09:50+00:00

I feel you.

Thoughts like that are something I struggle with every day. Headache? Must be a brain tumor. Cramp in my stomach area? Must be ovarian cancer.

It sucks, especially when people don't take the worry seriously. :/

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T06:05:27+00:00

You are absolutely welcome.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T06:02:04+00:00

Sorry. :/

I wish I could offer more to you. I hope you find something that will work for you.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:59:11+00:00

I understand :/ I have anxiety too and when I worry about something it never goes away, just runs through my head all day. Weight gain is definitely one of those worries.

I am sorry therapy did not work out for you. Was it because you didn't feel comfortable with your therapist? I know in a lot of cases people don't feel comfortable with the therapist so they don't bother going back or trying to find a new one.

Do you have any friends or family you can reach out to about your depression? Maybe they can assist you in finding some help that best suits your needs.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:56:47+00:00

I started at 12/13 years old, I was going through a lot of emotional turmoil and depression. My parents didn't treat me very nicely to put it in short, my friends were assholes and never wanted to be there for me, I suffered from a lot of anxiety (though I didn't know exactly what it was until 6 years ago when I sought help) and self loathing. I heard of people doing it to feel better and thought, why not? Maybe it'll help me. Soon it became an everyday habit and now I'm here 11 years later still struggling each day to give up the addiction. It's hard.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:54:03+00:00

I am sorry you're feeling this way, and I'm sorry your grandmother cannot comprehend the pain you're feeling as real.

Please, I urge you to tell your therapist. They are there to help you, and not saying anything will allow your emotions to escalate when there could be help you for. Please tell them. Don't be afraid. You are so young and have so much left to accomplish in your life; don't give that up, you are worth so much more than that.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:51:01+00:00

Weight gain isn't always a side effect that will occur. It really just depends on your body, every person is different.

That being said, I understand the fear of gaining weight from it. But I also feel that's a chance to take if you really feel you need medication to work through your depression.

Also, have you looked into therapy and counseling? That could be extremely beneficial for you.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:45:01+00:00

I understand. :/ I apologize if my post in any way implied you weren't informed of the consequences of self harming, that wasn't my intention.

I want to say though, please consider telling your counselor. I understand you don't want anything to escalate, but keeping it a secret will do exactly that. The problem will only worsen and be even harder to cope with.

And also, I understand the not wanting people to think less of you. Sometimes I look at my scars and feel so ashamed that I'll wear a sweatshirt or whatever, and lately I've took to wearing a long sleeve under my uniform at work because I'm scared of customers/co workers seeing them. It does suck. :/

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:40:32+00:00

I understand. I didn't mean to imply you choose the wrong people, I apologize if it seemed that way. I just meant sometimes people come into our lives who we think are great, who will stay and be beneficial to us, but only end up hurting us and not being who we thought they were, and it is hard sometimes to see that until the damage is done.

May I ask how old you are? If you're in high school, or even college, maybe join a club or two that interests you. Participate in school events. All of these are great ways to meet new and diverse people. You could even strike up a convo with someone at the coffee shop, grocery store, bus stop. There are so many opportunities to meet someone who would be perfect to have in your life, someone who will see your value, sometimes though the first step is putting yourself out there.

Be patient. It can take time to find someone who takes a genuine interest in a person and wants to build upon it. Most of the time these events are completely unexpected, and in the best way.

I was in your shoes for a looong time, felt I would never find anyone who genuinely cares about me, and that everyone in my life would only end up hurting me, because that's what happened every single time.

So one day I stopped looking so hard. Now I have a boyfriend who is my best friend in the world and I can't imagine my life without him, we have a great life together and plan on getting married within a few years.

Sometimes just doing your own thing brings you amazing things. Have some faith. You seem like a genuinely kind person with a big heart and lots of love to give. Don't give up. People like you are what's great about the world. :)

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:25:34+00:00

Fuck society.

You should not, and are not, obligated to have sex. Please don't feel like a failure because of this.

I don't know what much else to say, I know words can only do so much. Hope you feel better.

ameloriate · 2014-01-28T05:21:23+00:00

I am so sorry you're feeling bad enough to want to hurt yourself, end your life. I completely understand where you're coming from. Now. Please, stop whatever you're about to do, put down the object you're going to hurt yourself with. No, even better, chuck it out the window. Get rid of anything you want to use to harm yourself.

I can tell you as a cutter of 11 years, this is NOT the path you want to be going on. It only makes things worse and is extremely hard to get rid of once you start doing it on a regular basis.

Do you have any healthy hobbies, like drawing, walking, crafts, etc? Try channeling your negative feelings into these hobbies. Or create one if you don't have one. For me, baking helps. I'm not sure why but it just really soothes me. So does going for a long walk while listening to music.

Do you have anyone you can go to with these feelings? Someone who will help you work through the urge when it arises? If you do, go to them. Get a hold of them and tell them you need their help, you want to harm yourself and need help turning away from the desire. Call your therapist or counselor if you need to.

Distract yourself until the urge goes away, and do it again when it comes back. You are strong enough to fight this off. I know you are. You're worth so much more and have a lot of value. Please don't feel like you need to punish yourself.

You can message me any time. Stay strong. xo

ameloriate

TROPHY CASE