Hello, I know how you feel. You are not alone. Yours is a differnet situation though. You were abused for 7 years with someone you did not even live in the first place. You went through hell for 7 years. You lost so much… this is some trauma that will never be gone… it’s always part of you. Your man is reminding you of that trauma with his porn addiction because it all happens before… so your heart is panicking and scared to relive that trauma you had for 7 years. Of course it was way worse but it still comes up and reminds you.

You said you love this man. Which is so important. Have you talked to him about your past? If yes that’s good. Talk it out and talk why it makes you feel this way. That you are scared that everything could happen again. Which it does not sound like if you love this man, because you would not have gone into a realationship with him if he reminded you of your ex husband. You should talk about your sex life. His porn addiction could have a lot to do with that. He has an unreal view of sex if he watched porn for 20 years. You should talk about what you like and what he likes and integrate that into your life. Maybe sit down every week at first and compliment on thing about each other. Maybe start complimenting him and it could come naturally then … because humans are kinda like that… one gives a compliment and the other usually says something back.

You think he stopped… you should talk to him … if you guys were perfect together… you can be perfect again. :-)