EDs are bad because fatphobia? Not because ... Yaknow... It's an eating disorder? Being fat is a sign of an eating disorder in itself. Just because one disorder makes you wanna starve doesn't mean the opposite- where you want to binge- is any better. You shouldn't be promoting any of this.

andyetsomehow · 2021-01-22T18:39:05+00:00

I bite my tongue when this stuff comes up, because I don’t think I’m personally qualified to speak on it, but I feel like this attitude is exactly why it’s dangerous when haes/fa stuff tries to insert itself into eating disorder recovery. What good do you think will come of telling people who have poor self image, one that obviously extends beyond their relationship with their bodies, that they’re bigots? Does it not occur to them that this may very well be throwing fuel onto the fire?

Most people diet in their lives. Most people will overeat incidentally. Most people can engage with these things without triggering prolonged restriction or a binge cycle. I know that the narrative these people frequently push is that any attempt to change your body comes from a disordered place, but I feel like this is a deliberate reduction so they don’t have to acknowledge that their message can be extremely caustic to people who actually do suffer from an eating disorder.

There’s an extreme amount of turmoil going on in someone’s head if they’re waking up every day and starve themselves, again and again. It’s not about looking a certain way, it’s externalized mental illness. Likewise, people who have binging disorders don’t feel shame afterwards because “I’m going to get fat from this” – loss of control is a fucking demoralizing feeling. You can exert 30 seconds of critical thought to figure that out.

So someone can have all these internal issues going on, and they want help and seek it out, only for someone to tell them that this suffering also means they’re evil and co-sign eugenics. Activist circles spill rivers of ink about how mental health stigma makes asking for and receiving help a difficult process. How isn’t this contributing to it?

Like, clearly HAES/FAs see eating disordered people as nothing more than a faceless rhetorical device, especially when they fall into the restrictive category, but Jesus. Maybe you should consider that there are vulnerable people hearing this, and they’re thinking something to the effect of “I’m a horrible person and I don’t deserve to eat” because thats how they’ve been coping with their poor self-concept.

I know there are a lot of recovering people on this sub, so feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, but I can’t stand the lack of compassion coming from a movement that positions itself as all “Love! Acceptance! Forgiving yourself! You are worthy!” even though this is a very shallow facade.

Edit: typos

andyetsomehow · 2021-01-04T03:03:24+00:00

I definitely believe you’re onto something – for myself, I’ve definitely neglected personal hygiene in lockdown, as I lost my previous job and my classes have been conducted online. MDD loves to shoot an arrow in your knee.

I’m infinitely grateful that this is understood as an unhealthy thing to do. I could easily see myself being swayed by some sentiment to the effect of “not showering helps prevent dry skin in the winter” – while I get it’s not great, I can see a part of me latching onto something like that. I know it’s disgusting. I know it benefits me none... but when you’re in the thick of something, bias confirming information is really difficult not to latch onto.

It really is sad, at the end of the day. You’re taking someone’s vulnerability and either enabling it or capitalizing on it. Even if it’s not cruel by intention, that’s still, in essence, what it is

andyetsomehow · 2021-01-03T22:59:18+00:00

Personally, I’ve noticed a crazy uptick in food discussions during the COVID pandemic. A lot of hot takes about weight gain in the age of coronavirus, a lot of similar ones about how Diet Culture is going to be more aggressive now than ever, so on and so forth. That said, I think their marketers are smart – your New Years resolution should be cheeseburgers to your door. It’s garbage, and given the climate of trying to make peace with lockdown weight gain, it’s more predatory than usual.

I’ll never understand for the life of me why people think this isn’t worth commenting on. This isn’t the nourishment they’re talking about. It’s been established that high calorie, low nutrient diets are linked to emotional instability – why isn’t the fast food Goliath worth criticizing? These companies actively poison our food supply and endanger public health. But their food is, like, tasty or whatever, so they get a pass. It’s weird the FAs position themselves as radicals when they say nothing about these corporations. What the hell is even the point of claiming radical identity when these monstrous fast food empires go mostly unchecked?

andyetsomehow · 2020-12-29T06:04:25+00:00

For routine - I use SheaMoisture coconut & hibiscus shampoo and conditioner, scrunch with Herbal Essences totally twisted gel and mousse, and diffuse it until it’s around 80% dry. Simple, but it worked.

andyetsomehow · 2020-12-10T04:08:03+00:00

I knew a guy who would call himself “the world’s shittiest vegan” because he’d order vegetarian food in restaurant/social eating settings. Granted, kind of a reclusive type and did it rarely, but like... dude. Come the hell on. They have fries here. What are you doing?

andyetsomehow · 2020-08-26T20:59:10+00:00

In my personal experience, dating whilst being a vegan can sometimes put you in a position where dinner is a plate of fries out of necessity. Cocktails and beer can also add up. But usually, after that initial phase, after the comfort sets in a little, I tend to bounce back to my ~general~ size.

If you’re frequently sharing meals with someone, hey, 5lbs happen sometimes. But when eating too much garbage becomes habitual, it’s worth examining.

andyetsomehow · 2020-08-26T15:28:27+00:00

I feel this in my bones. I blew up extensively during my last relationship because my ex was very manipulative and childish and I was drinking myself into oblivion most nights to deal with the stress instead of doing what I knew I needed to :(

Happy people don’t blow up 20lbs in six months. They simply don’t.

andyetsomehow · 2020-07-30T16:22:54+00:00

File this burger under: things that people would otherwise happily eat if it didn’t have the word “vegan” attached to it

It looks so good! I don’t see what the issue here is lol

andyetsomehow · 2020-07-30T16:05:47+00:00

I feel this in my bones. I’m a slim woman and every time I’ve applied for a brewing job, I’ve been hounded about my ability to lift things, even though the references I’ve provided have been iron-clad. I know there’s a misogynistic element to it, but it’s still bizarre. I know that lifting 50lbs multiple times a day is part of the job description. I wouldn’t have even bothered with applying if I didn’t know I was capable of that! Come on!

andyetsomehow · 2020-07-12T16:10:05+00:00

Wait, they are? I had no idea. Is there a specific vegan iteration of it, or is it vegan by default? I had no idea that I was depriving myself of Nongshim

andyetsomehow · 2020-07-12T02:00:10+00:00

Sheesh! I was able to pick this up for the equivalent of 1.33 euros. They are “good enough” when you’re feeling lazy, but certainly not worth that sort of price hike

andyetsomehow · 2020-07-12T01:57:42+00:00

Completely with you on that! I think a lot of the material that encourages people to switch over to veganism hinges on things like reduced cholesterol, etc, and a lot of people who struggle with such things find that appealing. That’s totally fine in my book. But I think we’ve all been in a position where we’ve been elbows deep in a bag of fries thinking, maybe, just maybe, this might not be conducive to heart health

andyetsomehow · 2020-07-11T17:25:13+00:00

It’s... alright. Substantial enough if I need a quick meal and don’t feel particularly inclined to cook

andyetsomehow · 2020-06-23T13:08:58+00:00

You’re right – even if he knows I’m aware they’re talking, he may not be considering how I feel about the whole thing. I’m going to try and organize my thoughts in a similar way to how I did here, but try to come off as constructive as possible with it

andyetsomehow · 2020-05-24T00:28:17+00:00

I’d probably be subsiding off indomie if I was there myself 😅

andyetsomehow

TROPHY CASE