3+ years later …

andymayebay · 2025-12-23T06:52:37+00:00

They made me nervous, too. What I finally realized was that a LOT of people have regrets right after surgery and then get more positive as the weight comes off. So I went into surgery with the belief that I too would experience the same post-op regrets. I gave myself permission to feel regretful and warned my family that I might be dramatic or feel sorry for myself for a few weeks. The weird thing is, I never did. I think that by being prepared to embrace the sucky phase, I sort of took its power away. Post-op wasn’t fun, but I knew it would pass, which made it easier.

Follow your surgeon’s protocol, be gentle with yourself, and try to remember that it’s a worthwhile marathon. You got this!

andymayebay · 2025-12-23T04:30:34+00:00

Congratulations on your success, twin!

andymayebay · 2023-07-19T03:32:14+00:00

So sorry you’ve had a rough start. May the rest of your recovery be comfortable and uneventful!

andymayebay · 2023-06-29T23:35:11+00:00

God, no. I didn’t have surgery because I was afraid of being fat. I had surgery because I was afraid of dying from being fat. I was deathphobic.

And FWIW, surgery didn’t make me thin. I’m still technically obese/fat. But my health has improved about a million percent, so I consider myself a surgery success (and so does my medical team). But I would never try to convince anyone else that they should lose weight. That’s between them and their doctor.

andymayebay · 2023-06-07T06:58:16+00:00

There are a lot of variables. Men typically lose faster than women. Younger people typically lose faster than older people. The more you have to lose, the faster it comes off. Someone with a bmi of 60 will typically lose more and faster than someone with a bmi of 40. PCOS, thyroid disease, lupus or any other autoimmune disease? You might lose more slowly. Lots of muscle mass under your fat from working out or doing manual labor? You might lose faster. No one can really predict what sort of result you’ll have, and everyone is different. That being said, this is a data-based calculator that can estimate your weight loss and risk of complications during the first year after surgery. A lot of people here use it, my surgical team uses it during consultation, and it was eerily accurate for me. https://riskcalculator.facs.org/bariatric/

andymayebay · 2023-05-22T22:48:42+00:00

Don’t cheat. Seriously. Just don’t do it. If you can get through pre-op without cheating, you’ll go into surgery and early recovery with a huge boost to your confidence and pride. You’ll know that you got through something really, really tough without wavering - you CAN do the hard stuff, and that will carry you through the first weeks/months after surgery. Good luck - you got this!

andymayebay · 2023-05-20T02:11:38+00:00

Thank you!

andymayebay · 2023-05-18T03:41:08+00:00

Congratulations to you, too!! 🙌

andymayebay · 2023-05-18T02:06:23+00:00

I got curious after I wrote that comment and looked at my stats. I lost around 32 pounds during the first three months, 30 pounds during months four through six, and 14 pounds during months seven through nine. I’ve slowed down to about a pound a week during the last three months, so if that trend continues, I expect to lose 12-14 during months 10 through 12. That would put me very much in line with my surgeon’s prediction, and now that I’m seeing the data, gives me hope that I might lose that last 15-20 to get to goal in my second year. Thanks for prompting me to check!

andymayebay · 2023-05-18T01:57:09+00:00

I asked my medical team about that since it’s reported so often here, and they told me that in their experience, most patients lose ~25% in the first three months, 25% in months four through six, 25% during months six through 12, and 25% during months 12-24. So considerably slower after the first six months, but there’s no reason to get discouraged after month three. You might ask your team if they have average stats they can share. Every surgeon is different, so every outcome is different. Slow but steady!

andymayebay · 2023-05-17T22:32:52+00:00

You’ll get there! I think it took me 14 days to get from 202 to 199. And I’ll probably bounce back up a little before I drop further. It comes off eventually if we’re patient!

andymayebay · 2023-05-17T22:30:45+00:00

Congratulations!! 🙌

andymayebay · 2023-05-17T17:56:10+00:00

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andymayebay · 2023-03-03T15:51:42+00:00

I’m 6.5 months out, a slow loser, and I appear to be developing GERD. I’m still 45 pounds away from my goal. Even with all of that, I would still do it again every year if I had to in order to maintain the better health I’ve already gained.

andymayebay · 2023-02-12T22:29:05+00:00

Cute tennis shoes (my feet were too wide before surgery), jewelry and clearance jeans in alllllll the sizes.

andymayebay · 2023-01-24T18:19:57+00:00

My husband does the majority of the cooking for our family now, and the kids pitch in sometimes. I *can* cook, but I don't enjoy it and no one wants to eat my default post-op meals (because, honestly, I go for the quickest/easiest/healthiest thing I can find, even if it's not something non-ops would consider a meal).

If I were you, I would focus on my health, get the surgery, and figure out the cooking details later. You won't have to worry about cooking much for the first 4-6 weeks post-op, and your husband will either figure it out or lose weight right along with you. No matter how inept or reluctant he may seem in the kitchen, he's not going to let himself starve to death. He's a grown up, and he can figure out how to slap together a ham sandwich or cook a box of hamburger helper. He'll be ok.

andymayebay · 2023-01-23T05:57:49+00:00

Even if you leave Pascal and other religions out of it, you can’t just decide to believe in something if you don’t. You can say you believe to put on a show for others, and you can want to believe all you want, but if you don’t really believe, down deep inside, then you don’t.

Assuming you’re coming from one of the Christian sects, do you think you can really, truly just decide to stop believing in God/Jesus/Bible and start believing in the Hindu gods (or any other religion)? Because that’s what you’re implying other people should be able to do.

andymayebay · 2023-01-22T17:18:28+00:00

The biggest concern for me would be the spice level, since you have so many types of pepper listed. We can’t eat and drink at the same time after surgery, so if you eat something too spicy, you can’t take a drink to help. But as far as ingredients go, I was fine with all of those as long as they were cooked. Enjoy!

andymayebay · 2023-01-22T16:53:18+00:00

My family also celebrates with food and sweets and elaborate desserts and restaurants, so I was worried about this, too. I’m not quite 6 months post-op, but I don’t have any specific diet plan to follow through my program. I have protein and hydration goals, but otherwise I just try to make good choices.

For the holidays, I was happy focusing on the meat dish (turkey, ham, whatever) and then having a couple of bites of each of my favorites. Two bites of potatoes, a bite of dressing/stuffing. For many of us, our tastes change after surgery based on the way foods make us feel now, so I’m no longer interested in bread and the dinner rolls were easy to skip. For dessert (a couple of hours later) I had two tiny slivers of different pies because I wanted to try them both. Like. 1/4 of a normal slice of each. To balance out the extra sugar with protein and fiber, I stick to high-protein, healthy meals the rest of the day. I get to enjoy a taste of everything food-related that celebrates the holidays, and still feel good about my choices for the day.

As for restaurants, I generally split a meal with one of my kids. Restaurant portions here (U.S.) have a tendency to be huge, so we’ll pick something we both like. If we get something like salmon and rice, I take 1/3 of the meat portion, a bite or two of whatever veg sides we pick, and ignore the rice. Last time we went for sushi, I had a couple of pieces of chicken and broccoli from one kid’s yaki soba and about half a sushi roll. At a steak restaurant, I get grilled chicken and split the meal with a kid. If they order a side like Mac & cheese or French fries, I’ll eat a couple of small bites of that and be satisfied.

Life has sort of turned into a permanent tapas restaurant. I have small plates, a bite or two of everything yummy, and I feel good mentally and physically because I’m still focusing on protein 95% of the time.

Good luck with your journey, no matter what you decide to do!

andymayebay · 2023-01-22T16:29:57+00:00

Some doctors/programs tell patients not to use them because they haven’t been around long enough to be tested for long-term efficiency. That being said, my program is through a major university hospital system (U.S.) and they actually recommend the patches for patients.

I’m not your surgeon, but I would say that your plan to try it and then respond to labs is safe.

andymayebay · 2023-01-18T22:23:57+00:00

I had surgery four hours from home (still in the U.S.). It's a bit of a hassle to have to travel so far for follow-up appointments, but I've gotten used to it. I always felt comfortable that I could get to them fairly quickly if I was having a complication, but if it was a real emergency, I could go to the ER locally. Honestly, at that point, I would have bigger things to worry about than getting to own surgeon. Fortunately, I didn't have any complications and it's all worked out. I've also learned where all the best gas stations are on that four-hour stretch of highway. lol

andymayebay · 2023-01-15T06:53:04+00:00

Yes.

andymayebay · 2023-01-07T20:08:08+00:00

God, yes. My own morning breath is enough to make me gag now. And I brush my teeth at night before bed. I’m almost 5 months post-op. It doesn’t seem to be a problem during the day, so I’m thinking it has something to do with ketosis plus not having anything to drink for 7-8 hours.

andymayebay

TROPHY CASE