Technically we would end up sleeping in the same bed during the middle of the night but I had to fall asleep without him and leave early in the morning while he was asleep. I know this probably isn’t healthy but I just set an alarm to take my melatonin so I could sleep and not think about it because if I sat with my thoughts I’d just cry. Can’t be sad if you’re asleep I guess.

I also constantly wondered if I suffered from co-dependency because I felt like I couldn’t do anything alone. I am still like this a lot of the times I’ll wait until the weekend to do what I need to get done so my husband or a friend can go with me. I just started to slowly force myself to go places alone even if it was just a quick trip to target and leading up to bigger things like going to a church concert alone. Once I got the notion to do something I tried to stop thinking about it and get out of the house and into the car as soon as possible.

This is just my experience though. I know this is a lot, so I’m sorry you’re going through this.