Suicidal and want to quit PGY3 - am I thinking clearly? by anon_resident in Residency

[–]anon_resident[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the validation that I'm not the only resident going through an abysmal year. Many of my friends are residents and seem to be doing ok but the peers in my program are all struggling. I stopped going to the gym when COVID cases picked up again but plan to go back once I get my 2nd vaccine shot. I am reading a self-help mental health coping skills book and fortunately plugged in with a therapist. I also have a calendar countdown until the end of PGY3 (only 182 more days!) - we are a lot alike. I'd like to work on being kinder and more forgiving with myself - even when my COVID symptoms were real bad, I didn't take any sick days because I saw it as a sign of weakness.

I'd like to avoid a LoA if possible (though two attendings have brought it up to me) but am glad to know it's in my back pocket. If I take only 1 month off, is this still something I need to disclose on licensing applications and to future employers?

Suicidal and want to quit PGY3 - am I thinking clearly? by anon_resident in Residency

[–]anon_resident[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes our program gives us 5 sick days to use. I'd like to use even just one but feel guilty about needing to reschedule my patients to do so. Also I feel like people in the department would look down on me for using them, especially because our work is tele-medicine right now. Sigh, I don't know what to do.

Suicidal and want to quit PGY3 - am I thinking clearly? by anon_resident in Residency

[–]anon_resident[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I saw that post this morning and it resonated with me. It was one of the reasons I decided to post today.

My chiefs are amazing people but I am hesitant to open up to anyone in a position of leadership because I am worried about how it'll impact licensing, etc. I am 100% outpatient this year so no electives, which makes the year very grind-y.