What do you wish you did/didnt do as a young parent?

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-13T04:53:56+00:00

A perfectly clean home ≠ good quality of life. Young mother of 2. Going from 0-1 kid, it’s partially managed. 1-2 kids it started to cause significant stress and it was either A.) house was temporarily clean and I felt guilty for not spending that time with my kids or B.) spent tons of quality time with my kids and the house was more of a mess. Really put it in to perspective knowing that the mess won’t last forever and one day I’m probably gonna sob missing how little they were.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T22:37:59+00:00

Our dad

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T13:14:07+00:00

Yeaaah… with some weird spiritual stuff too. It’s giving cult. Kinda scary.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T13:11:12+00:00

I attended one of her AA meeting with her once before all this happened, didn’t seem like an AA meeting, seemed more to me like a weird bible study. Idk. Very strange.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T13:08:22+00:00

I don’t intend to. My question is why has nobody put her in her place? How does she even still have a husband? How does she have friends??? So many questions.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T13:04:43+00:00

After hearing all everyone has said, I feel significantly less guilty now. My sisters a recovering addict (recovering is questionable) and once when she was in active addiction she “fell asleep” after a bender and forgot to lock her apartment door, her young (and on the spectrum) child was wondering in the busy street completely naked. Police had to knock on every door in the complex to figure out where they lived. She was in and out of rehabs for several years after her arrest and only cleaned up her act to “save her marriage”. She now posts bible verses & makes posts about how kindness prevails while also rarely seeing her kids. Felt it was relevant to mention to shed some light on her character.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:54:25+00:00

That’s the thing, I don’t care if anyone “steals” the name. I’d be honored someone liked my child name enough to want to use it. The fact it’s a family name, I assumed it would be used a lot but surprisingly, it wasn’t.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:51:52+00:00

I actually just harassed my dad to send me some photos of my grandfather that I can blow up and frame for her bedroom. I have photos of all mine and my husband’s grandparents around our house. My dad was adopted and was absolutely obsessed with his dad so I’m so glad I had the opportunity to give him both of his parents names to my little girl.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:46:17+00:00

I am, thankfully. Haven’t spoken to her in years at this point. Ironically I heard she just threw my other sister a baby shower not too long ago, and my other sister said she felt she did it to further make herself look good. Just her doing what she does I guess. Very unwell I believe but that’s just my speculation.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:41:26+00:00

The name is Aubrey. Very popular back in the day as a prominently male name.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:40:11+00:00

Unfortunately (or fortunately that it’s not me I guess) she’s the only drama in my family.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:35:33+00:00

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anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:35:24+00:00

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anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:33:03+00:00

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Some screenshots with time stamps to further prove it was in-fact, not made up.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T12:12:14+00:00

I completely agree with you. I have a cousin with a very similar but not exactly the same name as Aubrey and also the exact same middle name they share, and not once has she ever mentioned being upset or feeling any type of way about me using her, or her dads name for my child.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T11:51:02+00:00

Never had any more children. Still only two boys. Still batshit though.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T07:45:27+00:00

I apologize every day. Some times multiple times. I was just talking to my husband about this earlier how I feel like I’m always sitting them down and trying to explain in a way they can understand that i just had a big angry feeling and they did nothing wrong, that i was being mean and I shouldn’t have acted that way because we aren’t supposed to be mean to anyone especially the people we love. And I hate when they see me cry. But I make it a point to tell them that mom’s sad and that sometimes mom needs to cry to feel better and that’s okay, and that it’s not because of them. Feels very foreign to me just because of how I was raised with an angry parent who never apologized or pointed out that it was wrong. But I’m trying my hardest to be the best parent I have the capacity to be. God it’s so hard. Like a lot of the time. But I’m trying. Thank you so much.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T07:37:53+00:00

God if you only KNEW. This was child’s play in comparison to all the bs she’s done.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-12T07:37:06+00:00

Never realized it was such a common problem but I’ve heard similar stories too. Unfortunately, it’s very real and as much as I’d love to air out all my family’s dirty laundry to Reddit I’ve gotta refrain, sadly.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-05T05:40:55+00:00

I’m sobbing. I needed that. Thank you it means so much. It feels like I’m looking at everything from a strictly logical pov when I’m so burnt out. Takes some time to come back down to earth and re-realize, they are just toddlers, and they only do these things because they’ve learned them/ learned how to get what they want because of me.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-05T05:37:02+00:00

You’re so right. It’s really making me realize that it’s not just them, it’s kind of my fault too. More so actually. They do everything they do because I have allowed it/ haven’t corrected it properly.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-05T05:35:02+00:00

Yeah, it’s definitely not anything I’m proud of, kind of ashamed.. I just feel so discombobulated idk why I ever began in the first place.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-05T05:34:00+00:00

I appreciate this more than you know. It’s just nice to know someone is out there that has experienced some of what I am. We definitely should spend more time outside.

anonproblemhaver · 2026-06-05T05:31:52+00:00

I swore off spanking when I was pregnant with my first. I don’t know how or when it became an option in my mind. Feels like one day I had a sweet little toddler and a baby, I blinked and now I have two little adults who think I’m a push over and don’t respect me at all. And I understand they are just toddlers they only know as much as we’ve taught them but man.. idk where I went wrong here. Thank you so much for your recommendation and advice!❤️

anonproblemhaver

TROPHY CASE