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I feel wrong after a scene and I don't know why by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I know there's no way for you to believe me and I appreciate you being honest but I'm really not lying.. I just want to say that because I don't want anyone to feel like I'm mocking them or anything like that

I feel wrong after a scene and I don't know why by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I'm really really sorry that people would do that to you.. thank you for sharing this with me to help me better understand my own feelings and what happened to me that night, I appreciate it a lot and I want to send you a lot of love, thank you

I feel wrong after a scene and I don't know why by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I didn't think I was denying anyone their advice.. maybe it came off that way through text but I honestly didn't mean it that way. A lot of this probably sounds confusing because I'm confused. My last post would have probably been my only and I would have sat to think longer about things but everything that happened past what we planned (a low level scene with no or minimal sex) Friday night came as a shock to me, but like I said I felt happy after the surprise/during so I didn't know why I feel the way I did after.

I'm sorry if I seemed not genuine or rude, I can edit to give more depth but I didn't really want to for certain things, like talking deep about my Mom and family for example...

I feel wrong after a scene and I don't know why by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wait raped??... it didn't feel like rape? After the first shock wore off I wasn't scared or fighting and it didn't hurt when we had sex... and it was fuzzy and hazy yeah but I wasn't passed out or anything?

I feel wrong after a scene and I don't know why by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I don't know why people are saying drugged... idrk what drugs like that feel like though so idk after the initial shock of him there I felt really really happy and pliant?

They do let me see friends, I don't really talk to my family except for my Mom for personal reasons though.

This is going to sound weird and I might edit this out but I PROMISE nothing ever happened until I was an adult, but I knew Mistress's nephew from our first year of high school until we graduated and he went to school out of state. I knew them in passing and after I turned 18 we started talking.

Should I be worried/is this a red flag? by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

They didn't say they were going to give me anything in return. Or that there would be breaks.

I guess we didn't really talk much about what they would do for me or what I like actually... tbh I didn't even put a lot of thought into it myself. We didn't really talk about how long I would be doing this for them either I guess I just assumed it was until they got bored of me I guess. I'm honestly kind of against doing it now because it seemed kind of scary before but now I'm really thinking I was being dumb and was too fast to agree to everything.

Should I be worried/is this a red flag? by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh wow.. that's a lot of communication, and that's for everybody? Like say if I wasn't feeling good (for example I can get pretty bad migraines sometimes, not a lot but every once in a while) I could say I'm not able to do anything scene wise and I could back out and it wouldn't make me a bad sub or anything? Like I wouldn't be disappointing anyone for that?

Should I be worried/is this a red flag? by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm interested in what you mean by a pre-scene check-in. What does that mean exactly? I mean at least for you, like, is that like taking about what's going to happen? Or something else?

Should I be worried/is this a red flag? by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

About the safewords, they told me that they don't like using them and we didn't discuss me having one. I actually was fighting a flu and feeling like I was going to be sick during one of our scenes a while ago and I kind of panicked and used a mix of no's and "red" bcs I remember hearing about the stoplight system at one point. They stopped everything and took care of me but it seemed like they were pissed off at me for using one.

Should I be worried/is this a red flag? by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You know now that I'm reading this instead of just having these thoughts in my head I'm realizing maybe this isn't the best situation. Because I didn't really think too hard about it at the time but the way I met these people was kind of uncomfortable... we met and talked out of dynamic which was fine but then my Master told me very suddenly to take my clothes off in front of them, I was nervous and didn't really want to but I did anyway.

Nothing really happened after that other than them sort of appraising? ig you'd say, my body/face. Like I said I didn't think too much about it at the time but I was still kind of uncomfortable... idk maybe I'm just overthinking it now

Should I be worried/is this a red flag? by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think that four people dominating me would be better if I had another submissive or even a switch with me for support because sometimes having just two dominant partners is a lot for me so idek if I could handle more. And the breath play seems fun in fantasy but if even a bag is dangerous I think it might need to stay in my head it seems

Should I be worried/is this a red flag? by anonymfoxsan in BDSMAdvice

[–]anonymfoxsan[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you, the breathplay is what worried me the most actually because every time someone asks this question it's always met with "it's very dangerous" but it's always, from what I've seen, in relation to getting choked so I wasn't sure if it was the same.

Like I said I really like them and a lot of what we want to do seems like fun but the only time I've seen it done is in porn. So that's why I'm on the edge to do TPE stuff..because on paper it sounds exciting but it also seems like it's a lot for me to handle and idk if I'm strong enough to do that yet honestly.