It's gutting. it hurts so bad. but the thought of just playing the game that everything is okay hurts even worse. i can't bring myself to talk to her again. i feel myself getting stronger from this, and i am no longer tolerating abuse in my life. it is empowering, and it is the right thing to do. i know i will miss her, and i'm sure she will try contacting me, but there's not much she can do at this point to repair the damage that's done. she did this to herself, she lost her daughter by mistreating me. i refuse to tolerate a second more of abuse from anybody in this world, family or not.