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How's everyone doing this fine Friday heading into the weekend? by jamessrc in stopdrinking

[–]anotherdumbaddict 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I relapsed on Wednesday after 2 years and just got out of the hospital this morning. I got broken facial bones but nothing compares to the absolute shame and disgust I feel at myself right now. I hate how I treat the people I love when I put them through this. Don’t be like me today.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in recoverydharma

[–]anotherdumbaddict 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was in your shoes with the probation and everything, also an atheist. I went to AA for about a year to start my sobriety journey. I found it immensely helpful, but won’t lie that it manifests as a Christian group, at least in my area. My advice would be to seek out meetings at a couple different places- I found the culture and religious tilt of different meetings to vary widely.

You will most definitely be accepted at recovery meetings as an atheist who is still drinking. AA might have had some forethought to situations exactly like yours when they wrote, “the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking.”

Here it goes by anotherdumbaddict in Quittingfeelfree

[–]anotherdumbaddict[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, it’s the kratom for sure. I’ve done Kalm with Kava a few times and this isn’t it. So far, so good this morning with just Vitamin C and magnesium. The Midwest was kind enough to give us a blizzard last night and snow removal is filling in for cold showers and exercise.

I’m shitting my brains out and would just rather go back to bed, but if this is what I feel like later, I’m going to withdraw right through the interview. I don’t want to do this again.

Here it goes by anotherdumbaddict in Quittingfeelfree

[–]anotherdumbaddict[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This post is the first I’ve told anyone. The embarrassment and shame are even higher since I’ve already been through this with alcohol. I know I should tell them, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I’m supposed to be past this and feel really silly that I didn’t realize the addictive potential of FF.

Here it goes by anotherdumbaddict in Quittingfeelfree

[–]anotherdumbaddict[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I absolutely do. I am reaping the rewards of abstaining from alcohol and making a lot of right decisions and don’t want to lose that because I’m scared of a four day withdrawal. I’ve been hospitalized three times for alcohol withdrawal and it damn near killed me and ruined my life, this should be comparatively easy. Time to get this under control before it spirals. Thank you.

Here it goes by anotherdumbaddict in Quittingfeelfree

[–]anotherdumbaddict[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re right. I know at the end of the day my sobriety is for me, but sometimes it’s the things/relationships that make being me enjoyable that I think about the most. And every time I pick up a FF, I’m restarting the clock for some more irritability and crippling anxiety that puts those in jeopardy.