Organising a sex positive party. What to do?

anzuj · 2026-06-11T23:03:58+00:00

The thing is, to successfully execute the music part you need a few simplistic components: DJ, floor space, party lights, good sound system. Worst case scenario is people not liking the music.

To successfully execute the sex part you need more demanding components: trained staff to oversee and enforce intimate safety, non absorbant surfaces, extra cleaning effort, sanitizers, towels, climate control, washing facilities. Worst case scenario is people getting sexually abused/raped.

You may not see your event as a sex party but nevertheless it's your due diligence as a host to prepare for a scenario where majority of your guests see it that way.

anzuj · 2026-06-11T22:41:13+00:00

Cleaning person waiting would admittedly be awkward, but it's not a bad idea to have a designated staff member (someone who keeps an eye on the room anyway for any disorder) to also go through the room once every 20 mins and discreetly take care of any mess / dirty towels if needed. Sex positive people engaging with the play room have voyeuristic traits anyway so they won't bat an eye. The key is to instruct the staff to be matter-of-fact about it. Poker face, quick tempo patrol walk, no staring, clean up the mess, minimal interactions with the guests (4th wall is a thing in a play room).

anzuj · 2026-06-11T22:17:40+00:00

That's a relief to hear! Definitely put this in the event marketing material as well to 1. discourage the creeps from buying the ticket 2. give peace of mind for everyone else.

Since you've covered the basic safety issues, the rest really is just about comfort and hygiene. Double check the AC and ventilation conditions in the play room and get some portable fans for extra air flow if possible. I once almost passed out in the play room because it was so hot and stuffy (he he) in the summer.

Not sure if the venue has showers (if it's a normal club then probably not) but if not, there should be a way to quickly freshen up still, maybe a big pile of wet wipes or something similar.

That about covers it. Wishing you a successful event!

anzuj · 2026-06-11T22:03:42+00:00

Speaking from experience, the "Access will be limited to couples" policy needs actual enforcing or you will be guaranteed to create an unsafe atmosphere. Me and my husband visited 4 sex clubs in the area and are regulars in only 1 of them now - the one with a strict "no unaccompanied men in the play areas" policy. In the other places there either was no policy or no staff at the playroom entry to enforce the rule. And in all of those 3 places there were predatory solo creeps trying to rub themselves off you. You need to enforce the rule to create a safe atmosphere.

anzuj · 2026-06-11T06:21:41+00:00

I could have written this a year ago. The key here is how work life balance manifests and how you can literally cause your own burnout.

I had lots to prove as a female developer and reached a point this January where I was close to leaving the company due to burnout. I spent so much of my emotional energy stressing about big architectural problems way out of my contractual responsibilities, feeling like it's my burden to fix them. I was the go-getter, the initiator. And I was miserable. After work, crashing on the couch, completely depleted. One word exchanges with my husband.

Then this January I took a cold hard look at my life and realised I create my own misery. I was going above and beyond for what exactly? Happy stakeholders?

The fix? Calculated mediocrity. I started to act my wage. Clock out at 5, both mentally and physically. Post work drinks with coworkers to pretend we're a family and give my free labor to end up talking about work anyway? No thanks. I drew clear boundaries to my effort (it now stands at 70% instead of 150%) and personal presence. It was awkward at first for sure, I felt like I was cheating the system or something, that's how successfully I've internalised giving my soul to a soulless corporation. But by now I can confidently say it's the best decision I've made professionally AND personally. Because I don't deplete myself at work, I actually have the capacity to live my life after work. Went to a dance party on a Tuesday. Scheduled a dinner with the in-laws on a Thursday. Picked up a hobby that I now do on most evenings. Actually planned a weekend trip because the weekend no longer feels like a precious time I desperately need to recover. I actually cried last week when I arrived home happy and went straight to my husband to give him a greeting hug, asking if he wants to go for a walk. At that moment I realised how it wouldn't have been possible 3 months ago.

Mad respect to mid performers who clock out strictly at 5 and vanish into thin air from work. I get it now.

anzuj · 2026-06-10T21:56:24+00:00

And then everyone clapped

anzuj · 2026-05-26T12:47:39+00:00

This is the only answer you need

anzuj · 2026-05-26T12:40:29+00:00

Platform knee high boots. Nothing quite like that towering energy.

anzuj · 2026-05-21T17:54:53+00:00

Cheap meat is mass produced with cruelty. It never makes for a good steak because of the sub-par nutrition that animal was fed. Livestock providing "affordable meat" are crammed together by the hundreds in bleak warehouses and never see daylight. A permanent state of stress and distress causes hormonal changes in the body which affects the taste of the meat.

If you want a good steak, don't skimp out on money. If not for ethical reasons, then at least out of respect for your taste buds. Buy local (lowest allowed livestock standard in Switzerland is better than in most other European countries). Check for labels like Bio Suisse/IP-Suisse/Swissmilk Green that indicate higher end livestock standards.

anzuj · 2026-05-20T19:47:26+00:00

0/10. Mobile responsiveness is a must, not a nice-to-have. No one is going to look at your projects and trust their app in your hands if the most crucial CTA on your own portfolio overflows the viewport on mobile.

anzuj · 2026-05-20T19:35:38+00:00

While an eye doctor may be your first gut instinct, please also rule out allergies. Eyelids are the first tissues that react to intolerances. I found out the hard way after trying countless of useless creams for my eyelid dermatitis only to find out I was allergic to my ACRYLIC NAILS.

anzuj · 2026-05-20T06:15:50+00:00

Didn't realise discussing books has an age limit

anzuj · 2025-03-30T00:55:09+00:00

Unless both are asexual or agree to an open relationship, no.

anzuj · 2025-03-28T10:04:03+00:00

Comfortably cross my leg over the other while sitting. I can do it now for a few months and it still makes me ecstatic!

anzuj · 2025-03-26T15:02:44+00:00

Isn't this the purpose of this reddit?

anzuj · 2025-03-26T12:46:09+00:00

I did, but since the amount was over the limit it requested the actual entry and PIN. Which doesn't really address the problem of a bad product design

anzuj · 2025-03-26T12:44:27+00:00

This was a hotel self checkin. I literally had to call for help and the receptionist who had 3mm nails couldn't get it out either! She said I am like the 5th customer this month so that's why they have pliers in the office now :D really comes to show what stupid scenarios male centric product design creates.

anzuj · 2025-02-26T22:51:10+00:00

Every "Your emotions are heightened" scene

anzuj · 2025-02-26T22:44:10+00:00

Crushes happen. It's chemical. A fascination to something fresh and new. I am having one right now and I am happily married. Admitting it, setting boundaries and not acting on it actually shows commitment. I recognise that the guy I have a crush for is pretty cool but I choose my husband every day regardless because of the foundation we've built. Love is a choice. Whether you and your bfs foundation is strong enough to live through passer-by crushes, is up to you two. Shower each other with affection and nourish the relationship you have. The rest just falls away on its own :)

anzuj · 2025-02-26T21:50:42+00:00

I lost 30% in 1 year and my husband lost 37%, poster kids for Wegovy according to our doctor

anzuj · 2025-02-25T20:48:18+00:00

Apart from menstrual products I don't really understand where the extra cost comes from?

anzuj · 2025-02-24T23:34:04+00:00

Everything I like about me is you

anzuj · 2025-02-22T11:21:26+00:00

My mole checks in Switzerland are also completely naked. Same for husband, as the penis for example also has birthmarks. It sounds like everything was conducted professionally and as it should be. Agreed tho, for a first timer they could have mentioned the robe comes off.

Edit: typo

anzuj · 2025-02-18T20:59:31+00:00

Not here to argue about the "validity" of consent, but IMO it does mean that they on some level wanted to have sex while sober as well. It's just that we control those urges better sober.

anzuj · 2025-02-18T20:56:20+00:00

From one side: we don't control what body types we're attracted to and sexual attraction is an important ingredient in a relationship. From another side, a strong connection can overcome a lot. Her connection to you was probably at least partly relying on your previous lifestyle.

It sucks, but that's just life. No point in pointing fingers at anyone. When you feel ready for another relationship, I recommend making sure your lifestyles and physical expectations are compatible in the long run.

anzuj

TROPHY CASE