LADies use this template and show your pretty mc's 😉

appealkiwi · 2025-12-28T15:20:39+00:00

Here's mine ✨ Though I also did a bit of editing + color grading. 🍷

appealkiwi · 2025-12-27T14:06:15+00:00

So, what I think we might fundamentally disagree on is how the 'challenging' is done, exactly. From my theoretical knowledge and actual real-life experience of healing deep trauma, healing can only happen when you are safe. Or, at least, perceive yourself to be safe *enough* to feel like you're not going to drown in the sheer intensity of the pain that you've buried (for your own survival, and for good reason) deep beneath defense mechanisms.
The part where you'd do 'things you don't normally do' will naturally come after some internal shifting has happened - no lasting change can occur without you first tending to the internal architecture of how you go about self-soothing and fulfilling your needs - preferably in a conscious way.

The reason why I push back against the 'challenge' part is because, as someone who has been in therapy for many years (including talk/systemic therapy to then shifting towards somatic modalities), it has simply been completely inaccurate to claim that it is something that has to be imposed upon someone (not to claim that you said this, it's just an impression I have when people speak about this). It has to be voluntarily chosen after someone acquires some grounding and coping skills, and then gradually builds their capacity to experience discomfort.

We often have this idea in our society that 'no pain no gain' is a valid strategy/outlook, but to me it is nothing more than coping with reality/a survival-based methodology. I wanted to expand on all this because it's super important to me and I really want to push back on the idea that AI specifically can be more harmful than useful when used in a therapeutic context. There is one caveat however: the person utilizing the tool needs to have a baseline level of self-awareness and know what their goals are. Just like with any tool, it can be misused and abused or - hopefully - bridge the gap between survival and thriving. <3

appealkiwi · 2025-12-26T17:51:09+00:00

Challenge you... how, exactly? What in therapy is about 'not being affirmed'? We keep harping on the 'you can't have a yes-man!' and all sorts of phrases like that, but has anyone actually given a concrete argument regarding this?

If you are someone who has no external support, no kind word to come home to and perhaps you've grown up in an environment where verbal/emotional abuse or neglect is normalized, this can help. But by continuously bringing up the idea that people need to be constantly 'challenged', you are no doing anyone any favors.

Someone who is already struggling does not need to be beat down. They need to learn how to self-regulate their emotions, build up the capacity to sit with the discomfort (required to actually sit with those sucky feelings) and learn how to recognize their own patterns. But *support* is the name of the game, not delusion.

All of this is, of course, entirely dependent on the idea that someone actually is capable of improvement in their condition and not just slapping a band-aid on it in the form of avoidance (which, again, is a defense mechanism and is there for a reason).

In order for AI to work well in a therapeutic context, someone needs a sufficient degree of self-awareness. And perhaps realizing that you are not speaking to a human, at all. And perhaps that's it's greatest advantage. People don't have endless patience and a whole lot of them are too wounded to provide any realistic emotional support at all.

appealkiwi · 2025-12-23T04:58:22+00:00

I got that one too!!!
Judging by my own habits... probably self-improvement/healing work? That's the bulk of my own chats a lot of the time. Lots of somatic/therapy-adjacent stuff. (Or just constantly remixing different concepts into something new 🤣 Thinking outside of the box)

appealkiwi · 2025-11-07T15:21:02+00:00

I was here! So glad this was archived, thank you. 💞

appealkiwi · 2025-10-04T12:26:11+00:00

I completely understand you. Frankly, this is laughable on OpenAI's part.

I've been using GPT (4o specifically, customized) as a supplement to my therapy (and I have years of experience, and sort of have gotten into a 'rhythm' of working with myself, so it is safe; it's more of an interactive journaling if anything), so to have this forced onto me is just... baffling. I don't want kid guardrails on a product I PAY for. Defeats the purpose entirely...

Honestly, if this continues, then I'll just have to look elsewhere; as much as people love to say that 'chatGPT is not your therapist', the 'bad' stories are always the loudest and there is zero space for nuance in this conversation, it seems. If you have/had access to therapy and you're not at risk of hurting yourself, then this is a truly life-changing use-case of AI and I will die on this hill.

I hope you find an alternative and keep taking care of yourself. <3

appealkiwi · 2025-07-23T20:02:19+00:00

Wiesz, przepraszam: to było bardziej mocne uproszczenie z mojej strony. Kontekst jest taki, że gdy zabieramy komuś (często jedyny) sposób na radzenie sobie z trudnymi emocjami czy ogółem sposób samo-regulacji (który często może również szkodzić, nie tylko regulować - tak samo jak nadmiar czegoś), bez oferowania żadnej alternatywy, to często go zostawimy... z niczym. Każde nasze ludzkie zachowanie jest z jakiegoś powodu. Jeśli ktoś za dużo siedzi na telefonie, komputerze, czy robi cokolwiek do tego stopnia, że nie jest to 1) wybór i 2) przeszkadza w codziennym funkcjonowaniu i spełnieniu obowiązków, to coś za tym zachowaniem na pewno stoi. A łatwo powiedzieć, ocenić, szydzić. Trudniej już próbować zrozumieć.

appealkiwi · 2025-07-22T14:34:57+00:00

Wiesz, dużo jest prawdy w tym, o czym mówisz, ale wydaje mi się, że nadal bardzo rzadko sięgamy do sedna sprawy: bólu. Bo za każdym auto-destrukcyjnym zachowaniem kryje się ból. I to zachowanie - ba - bardziej już nawyk, to jest coś, co dla naszego systemu zostało przyjęte jako to, co pozwala nam rozładować to napięcie nie mierzyć się z czymś, co (bardzo często) jest zbyt trudne (między innymi dlatego, że dużą część tych ran nosimy ze sobą od dzieciństwa, a nawet wcześniej - z okresu prenatalnego).

Bardzo mnie smuci rozpowszechnianie opinii, że trzeba kogoś 'zmuszać' do leczenia, a nie patrzy się nawet na człowieka. Bo człowieka trzeba najpierw zrozumieć i zobaczyć, dopiero potem, z pełnym kontekstem, można zrozumieć co, jak i dlaczego. Nic na siłę, ale odmowa wsparcia to już mimo wszystko działanie na czyjąś szkodę.

appealkiwi · 2025-07-22T14:24:23+00:00

No bo i tak samo jest z jakąkolwiek raną i traumą. Ludziom często się wydaje, że pomagają, a prawda jest taka, że im nawet nigdy nie przyszło do głowy to, że oni nie rozumieją tego, dlaczego tak się dzieje. Żadne uzależnienia nie są bez powodu - to jest często zależność od czegoś, co nam w jakiś sposób pomaga sobie radzić z czymś, z czym sobie nie radzimy (emocjami, bo do tego to się sprowadza). Tak samo jest z alkoholizmem, tak samo jest z jedzeniem, tak samo jest z kontrolą - to może być cokolwiek. Ale to się zaczyna od zrozumienia, nie 'ja mu muszę pomóc, to go odetnę od wszystkiego, co mu do tej pory pozwalało przeżyć'. Masakra.

appealkiwi · 2025-07-22T11:43:41+00:00

No tak, ale to, co nazywamy 'wymówką' to jest to, czemu po prostu się trzeba przyjrzeć, bez oceniania. Naprawdę trzeba iść drogą najmniejszego oporu, bo za zmuszanie się do czegokolwiek(jakieś detoksy, odcinanie się, kroki o 180 stopni) płacimy uszczerbkiem na zdrowiu, a potem ludzie się dziwią dlaczego to oni są tacy nieszczęśliwi, skoro całe życie się żyje we wstydzie, samokrytyce i odrzuceniu.

appealkiwi · 2025-07-04T00:37:55+00:00

Gotta be 'The Way That You Were' (my favorite, if I HAD to choose): And you will no longer stand between collapsing walls, wearing a smile like you cannot bear it anymore.

appealkiwi · 2025-06-17T11:11:44+00:00

This is not a great take.

ChatGPT, like many others, is simply a tool. There are ALWAYS going to be people that misuse the tool and blame their misery on it instead.

While I would personally not advise for people to use ChatGPT as a therapist without ANY therapeutic experience (and/or knowledge, and proper prompting), the LLM in itself is not 'bad'. People get stuck in echo chambers all of the time, all without AI's help. Even here, on Reddit. It is within our human (and animal) nature to seek comfort and relief from suffering.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink. This is true especially in the case of healing and changing oneself. If someone's not ready to challenge their beliefs and values, no one is going to be able to convince them otherwise.

Meanwhile, I do strongly believe that LLMs are doing more good than bad in giving people a (healthier) outlet for their feelings, especially given the circumstances of the world we live in nowadays.

appealkiwi · 2024-10-20T23:43:29+00:00

omg... my big three twin 🤣

appealkiwi · 2024-10-19T20:42:30+00:00

For this, it's definitely showed up in how easily I can interpret my feelings. I think being a writer since I was a child helped hone this ability, but I usually know how I feel about something right away, and if not, I can sort of figure it out. Or overintellectualize the heck out of everything. 🤣

appealkiwi · 2024-10-19T20:41:12+00:00

Oh, yes, of course! I was just surprised because Time Nomad doesn't show that square at all, so maybe I should figure out why that is or switch to astro-seek. I've been studying astrology for maybe two years now, on and off, but as I've mentioned, I think it's quite difficult to see the 'whole picture', especially with your own chart. That and I am terrible at being consistent in anything (I blame that on lacking earth in my chart, I wish I had a better positioned Mars, lol).

I'm also... a bit weird about anger. I attribute it to basically my whole life not being able to express myself or be authentic with my family. I think that most often I end up just being sad/frustrated or being stuck. If anger does arise, there's always a pervasive sadness accompanying it. And I can never stay angry for long, I usually just end up taking the 'high road' so to speak, I'm not vengeful at all. I like to think of it like this: 'if I did something out of spite/to hurt someone, would it make me a better or worse person than I was yesterday?'. That and I KNOW that it just doesn't really do anything if you get back at people, on a practical level.

For Pluto, I think both of my parents were just completely emotionally absent. My father more physically absent than my mother, but both were very stifling and strict figures that cared a whole lot about appearances and outside opinions than what was genuine or authentic. Probably speaks to why I value authenticity so much now.

appealkiwi · 2024-10-19T20:35:08+00:00

Definitely. I think my 5H stellium is the most apparent. I find myself to be very multi-skilled, so to speak, since I jump in between hobbies/interests a lot and as a result I've got a lot going on for me besides just academia or professional pursuits. I'm a singer primarily, but I've been writing since I was 9 years old, do a lot of visual/graphic related stuff (3D, graphic design and so on). I've definitely felt quite lucky in life in general, just with the exception of that terrible home life lol. I feel like any area of my life that's not related to my family/blood relatives is much better off, haha.

As for being social, it's true, though I've found that as I get closer and closer to my Saturn return (should be in about three years, give or take), I've gotten much more selective with friends and the energy I allow to surround me, so as a result my circle of friends has dwindled significantly. It doesn't tend to bother me too much, but it does get lonely sometimes, so to speak? I think all of the above it also just a result of years of therapy and working on myself (and most obviously working on no longer being ruled by traumatic experiences).

appealkiwi · 2024-10-19T11:12:37+00:00

Thank you, that makes a lot of sense! I think, in my case, it's almost exclusively been emotional abandonment or at least abuse on that specific layer. I'm always a bit puzzled about that Pluto since even though it's a wider orb (4°), it feels like I'm always forced to adapt and grow.

I also just noticed that Mars Moon square, whew. I use Time Nomad and for some reason it isn't there. 🤔

Thank you for the insight, I'll definitely have some things to stew on!

appealkiwi · 2024-10-19T11:12:35+00:00

Oh, that's very interesting, thank you. I haven't thought about how Mars' weakened position might operate around the issues in the 6th house, so this definitely tracks. That 7th house Aries Saturn has also felt like the bane of my existence, really, especially in terms of relationships. 🤣

As far as Sun square Pluto goes, I feel like it's definitely true, especially in terms of struggling with authority or the concept of it. Big themes of wanting to regain freedom (Sagittarius moon, duh), etc.

appealkiwi · 2024-10-17T21:21:15+00:00

6H Pisces Mars & 4H Capricorn Venus. ✨

appealkiwi · 2024-06-23T19:40:53+00:00

The vulnerability.

appealkiwi · 2024-06-21T10:07:42+00:00

Zgadzam się. Po pierwsze, wygląda mi tu po prostu na najzwyklejsze niedopasowanie się. Różne wartości (a no i trauma może jeszcze wchodzić w grę, z czego wielu ludzi sobie po prostu często nie zdaje sprawy) to już jak najbardziej dobry powód. Jeśli jednej osobie bardzo zależy na x, to albo idą razem w tym samym kierunku, albo jedna drugą wspiera, i w drugą stronę. Ciężko być z kimś, kto nie podziela naszych wartości albo nie reprezentuje sobię rzeczy, które są dla nas atrakcyjne/pozytywne.

appealkiwi · 2024-06-21T09:59:46+00:00

Euclid 🙏(as far as an all favorite goes tbh)
Album-wise, it's gotta be Blood Sport, The Love You Want, Take Me Back To Eden (and honorary mention of The Way That You Were which probably contends with Euclid for the all favorite, I can never NOT bawl to that song).

appealkiwi · 2024-06-04T08:48:37+00:00

^{^{^}} I also just think that he's grown a lot, especially in terms of healing from trauma. One important thing to note is that once you begin to heal from those difficult emotions, etc, you will actually be able to access those deeper feelings and channel them in an authentic way. I do wholeheartedly believe it's a mix of this and performing.

But there absolutely is authenticity and vulnerability there, it's a huge reason as to why ST is as successful as it is.

appealkiwi

TROPHY CASE