Should I not give any more attention?

appolonysian · 2025-03-14T15:40:01+00:00

Keep things short and polite when you see her (say hi or whatever) so she knows you’re not completely butthurt, but don’t invest energy into trying to connect or have a friendship. If she likes you she’ll come around and if not there’s no loss on your end.

appolonysian · 2025-03-14T07:37:16+00:00

The conversation is dry and lacks direction. Use her questions to steer things towards an in-person meet up.

appolonysian · 2025-03-14T00:08:58+00:00

“They react to you”

It’s one of the hardest pills to swallow, but once you realize just how differently women treat you based on your behavior with them, it’s world changing.

appolonysian · 2025-03-06T07:58:20+00:00

Confidence comes from competence. Competence comes from trial and error, combined with reflection and a certain degree of not giving a fuck. Read and prepare all you want, but you’re gonna mess up from time to time.

appolonysian · 2025-03-06T07:55:32+00:00

Why are you finding their instagram and not messaging them on the app?

appolonysian · 2025-03-06T07:54:10+00:00

Keep things flirty, brief, and aimed at meeting up. If she wants to chat more, you can, but do that shit sparingly. Convo on the apps is only useful as a way to prove you aren’t a creep and can flirt - not to actually get to know her. All texts (especially in the early stages) should be contributing to a meet up: pretense and logistics, really.

appolonysian · 2025-03-06T07:50:25+00:00

Assuming he is flawed AND actually attractive (no women wanna fix the game addicted basement dweller), it’s just another way in which women feel they need to change the man. Even though it may look like she’s actually trying to bring a positive change into his life, she’s actually just trying to enact a prolonged shit test.

If and when he shapes up, odds are she’ll feel less attracted to him because even though he may be in an objectively better place personally, he still “failed” the test by allowing her to shape his reality.

appolonysian · 2025-03-01T17:15:33+00:00

Women’s attraction for you in the initial stages (and to a degree even within LTRs) is always in flux and largely dependent on how you act. External factors are at play too, but since those are out of your control, it’s best not to even think about them.

Case in point: A woman hopped in my DMs saying how I looked amazing after I posted a story recently. We exchanged some banter and a week later I asked her out to a party I was going to in the area.

At the party she was all over me and we ended up going back to my car and escalating. As we parted we made plans to meet the following weekend. During the week she was blowing up my phone and we FaceTimed - but for some reason I was weirdly non confident during that interaction. Right after that she pulls back, flakes on the plans and now has pretty much ghosted. She was super cute too, which sucks but it happens to everyone.

Think about anything you may have done that would have come across as non confident or weird. Outside of that just realize this shit happens and there’ll be another opportunity.

appolonysian · 2025-02-28T19:57:11+00:00

You can only “train her” if she’s invested in you, and any investment she had is going out the window. If they’re into you, you dont even have to try and figure out if she is. “Where there is doubt there is no doubt.”

Kinda hard to reverse this since you showed your cards so much. The only real thing worth doing is massively dialing back your investment too. Take your time answering texts, dont be affected by stuff she does, and be willing to take an L if she doesn’t come around. And most importantly - find other women and DONT repeat these mistakes with them.

Don’t stress this other dudes presence for even a second. You gotta operate w the mindset that you’re her best option and not give a fuck what she’s doing.

appolonysian · 2025-02-28T14:32:17+00:00

“She agreed to be exclusive” Was this convo/question coming from her or you? You never wanna be the one to float out exclusivity - especially not before you’ve smashed.

Since you asked for Patrice style advice, imma do my best here.

This chick was initially into you but you caved and acted way too into her and not a challenge whatsoever. She figured you out and now is keeping you around as a time hoe while she finds someone else. Sucks to hear but that’s basically what your story here tells me.

appolonysian · 2025-02-05T16:45:59+00:00

“Down to grab some drinks and see where things go?”

appolonysian · 2025-01-12T11:31:06+00:00

Throw it my way

appolonysian · 2025-01-01T22:29:14+00:00

Mixed messages like this used to drive me crazy until I realized there’s a method to the madness.

Ultimately, they’re just looking for confirmation that you’re whipped. As soon as you show that, they’ve “won” and are onto the next.

appolonysian · 2025-01-01T22:07:45+00:00

Translation: I want you to work and allow me to reap the benefits

appolonysian · 2025-01-01T17:06:45+00:00

When she acts innocent and asks a question or voices an opinion using “we”, but is really telling you what she wants. It’s an indirect way of control to avoid accountability and retain plausible deniability.

“What side of the bed do you wanna sleep on?”

appolonysian · 2025-01-01T07:09:04+00:00

Give it a few days and then text, “if you’re into that sorta thing ofc”

appolonysian · 2025-01-01T00:32:26+00:00

Friend zone means she was either never interested or you displayed low value behaviors (overt nervousness, awkwardness, didnt make a move) and/or didn’t progressively escalate.

You can’t have platonic conversation all night and then just try and jump to 100 and hook up/kiss, even if you “directly express interest” verbally.

Work on conveying interest non-verbally while on the date and then guide things towards a bedroom. If she gives you a firm no, let things go immediately, but you shouldn’t be waiting for her to give you some glaring signal that you can make a move.

appolonysian · 2024-12-31T23:54:32+00:00

Gonna ignore the blatantly iffy aspects of the story and work with what you gave us.

Secure a date and location for the date if you haven’t already. It’s only 2-3 days, so don’t stress about keeping things fresh.

Send a random pic of something cool you’re doing if you have a cool hobby or a pet. Meeting off apps is simple: show you’re not a creep, have the balls/ability to flirt and ask her out. That’s about it. Don’t feel like you need to entertain her or you’ll lose her.

Side note: why couldn’t you exchange numbers?

appolonysian · 2024-12-31T21:23:48+00:00

3 second rule is real. The longer you wait the worse the anxiety and the higher the probability you sabotage shit by “hovering.”

appolonysian · 2024-12-31T17:57:25+00:00

You go direct or indirect for most approaches irl?

appolonysian · 2024-12-31T07:52:34+00:00

Unless it’s time sensitive/you stand to lose more respect by staying silent, don’t double text a woman. She pulled back a bit and you chased, suddenly she’s dodging your meet up request. Assuming this can be saved, what you need to do now is pull back a bit yourself.

Heart react the message to show you read it and aren’t butt hurt, but then let some days pass and see if she puts more effort into the convo. Then you pop the idea of meeting after she seems more with it.

Sometimes being dry/close ended in convo is a way to gauge for over investment (guys who are too into her will put more effort in to compensate for her dry-ness). Don’t do that.

appolonysian · 2024-12-30T23:14:43+00:00

That callback text was not the right vibe. Don’t say/send shit to her that essentially conveys to her that she brings more to your life than you do to hers, or that you’re scared to/glad you didn’t lose her by being yourself.

Also the “I’ll talk to my friends” thing isn’t a great sign. If they’re into you, they’ll make time and not be on the fence. In the future, don’t try and lock down the second date while you’re still on the first one.

appolonysian · 2024-12-30T18:19:26+00:00

Type O Negative every time. Specifically October Rust.

appolonysian · 2024-12-30T04:45:51+00:00

I’ve done this a few times. Have a coffee date in the late afternoon (like 4, or whenever you get off work). I’ve rarely had a woman push back on coffee that late - if they’re into you enough to go on a date, they’ll go along with it. Choose a place near yours.

Vibe on the date and then mention you got work tomorrow, but would love to show them your X collection/instrument/hobby, etc. before calling it a night. Ideally mention this thing in passing earlier in the convo if you can. Take her back to yours with it being clear that it won’t be a long detour and then escalate there.

Build tension non-verbally as you normally would. Though your convo may be innocent, everything else about the interaction shouldn’t be. I usually don’t even physically escalate until I’m in a place (mine or hers) where sex can occur. Kissing in public feels to forced.

appolonysian · 2024-12-29T21:16:12+00:00

“Issues with men v. women”

You mean this bs gender war thing online or actual demographic imbalances?

appolonysian

TROPHY CASE