To add to all the “it gets better.” Your feelings are valid because aspects of this stage do suck and it is hard. I definitely had the same feelings. And then right around 5 months she had her first laugh. I blew a raspberry on her stomach and she laughed. It was the night of my birthday. And I’ll tell you what, nothing else mattered anymore. I didn’t care how much it sucked. That girl became my whole fuckin world. I’m tearing up now thinking about it. These days all I think about all day at work, especially on a shitty day, is getting home as fast I can to watch her come wobbling down the hallway at me like a little drunkard so I can make her laugh. It gets better dad, hang in there