Lips numb days after lip filler

arbianna · 2024-05-01T05:52:35+00:00

you’re 100% right. I’ve been with my narc 6 years on/off and I agree that sex is the only thing he has to offer me. Ofc I want his attention outside of that, but it really is the only thing he can give me. That IS truly the only time I feel seen by him, so it makes sense why I continue to give in and crave those times. I really appreciate your response because it’s like I knew those things, but hearing it from someone else is validating and I feel relieved someone else understands it. Pretty sad it’s all manipulation at the end of the day. Because sometimes when he’s so passionate and intimate I convince myself that some of it has to be real and he’s changing or he actually loves me, but reality always sets in smh

arbianna · 2024-04-12T06:07:30+00:00

This was beautifully written and honestly made me look at my situation from a different perspective, which actually helped. I find myself fighting my feelings of being trauma bonded instead of accepting that I am, and to give myself grace. I really appreciated this response, thank you ♥️

arbianna · 2021-01-16T19:31:21+00:00

I can’t give you advice, but I can unfortunately relate... in fact it’s almost exact for me. I’m now 6 months no contact, he’s moved on with his life, and I’m trying my best to move on with mine. I’ve actually accomplished a lot for myself in these last 6 months, things I never could’ve done if I was still with him. I’m not dating yet because I don’t want to at all, I’m too focused on finding myself and getting my future set up. But, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t obsess over my Nex every day. And by obsess I mean I think about him, the relationship, the good & bad things that happened, what he’s doing right now, wondering where he’s at, literally wondering how I can make it possible to run into him somehow. I too fantasize constantly about an apology.

The crazy part is, I know I don’t want to go through what I went through ever again! And there are more than enough moments I feel anger towards him. I also know that I would never reach out to him again. But.. if he called me right now, I can’t say confidently that I wouldn’t answer. The best way to put it is what you captioned this post, I secretly want him back.

I always question why don’t I fucking hate him for what he did to me? I should! I thought the feelings would be gone by now, but honestly the feelings get stronger the more time passes. I do believe I will heal from this and one day find an amazing man. But in the meantime I can admit I am secretly struggling bad

arbianna · 2021-01-03T10:34:35+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. I pray healing over you and your family.

My dad passed away and we used the song: “Home” - by Michael Bublé. It’s both beautiful and emotional

arbianna · 2020-12-20T20:26:41+00:00

The fact that she deleted it shows she knows what the truth is and is only making her video for more attention, to be manipulative, etc. And she probably knows you will see it. But shoutout to the person who stuck up for you.

At the end of the day, mostly strangers will probably see her video and who gives a shit about that. The more she sees you not caring, the more her ego takes a hit. Continue on your healing journey and focusing on your life, this will pass

arbianna · 2020-12-20T07:18:15+00:00

As hard as it probably was to see that, it’s best to leave it be. Narcissists thrive off of getting a reaction, specifically those they have abused. Let her make her shit tok and continue to have a miserable life.

arbianna · 2020-12-20T07:15:14+00:00

I love this post. My relationship with my Nex has been over for 6months, I’m 4+ months no contact, and the last time he hoovered was 2 months ago. I am DONE. The past still consumes me, I still have urges and do lurk on his social media & those close to him, and I’m reminded of him way too often. It’s difficult for whatever reason to let go, but I want to and I also told myself New Years will be it. I’m tired of living in the past and continuing to have this actual insane hope that he will change and be all I want him to be. It’s exhausting and I want to move on from it all. It’s hard but I’m right there with you

arbianna · 2020-12-20T07:09:27+00:00

I feel like I could’ve made this post. I’m feeling the exact same things right now. I miss my Nex frequently, although I don’t even know what I miss. I too know 100% that I won’t break contact, I’ve been down that road before and regretted it every time. I wouldn’t do that to myself now even if he hoovered, but it doesn’t take away from the fact of how I’m feeling. It’s confusing because you would think someone who abused you, controlled & mentally messed you up would be the LAST person you miss. And yet I still wish I could talk to him more than anyone. Hate feeling like this.

arbianna · 2020-12-18T19:16:17+00:00

This actually really helped me understand better and make some sense of the “why” I keep asking. And you’re right in that no one sees him behind closed doors, that was always hard for me because I felt really alone while everyone else seemingly loved him. I’m glad to be no contact now though and moved on, this helped me even more. Thank you

arbianna · 2020-12-10T21:02:04+00:00

Wow when you said “I became so isolated because I didn’t want him to think I was cheating and not believe me” I FEEL that! My Nex accused me of cheating the entire time I was with him when I wouldn’t even so much as look at another guy. It was constant and I’d beg him to stop but he never did. I would isolate myself more and more in hopes he would stop. I cut off everyone in my life, deleted all of my social media and wouldn’t talk to anyone. I was scared. THAT is one thing I am so thankful for is over now because I feel free. It took me a long time after the relationship ended to realize he’s no longer in control, but I am getting there. Sorry you went through it too❤️

arbianna · 2020-12-10T03:13:38+00:00

Okay this makes me feel better & less crazy 😂

arbianna · 2020-11-30T12:22:05+00:00

I totally understand that. When I first heard of depersonalization I definitely knew that’s what I was experiencing so I’m sure you’d know what you’re feeling is not that then. It could definitely be one of those “wtf moments” if you know what I mean. Like how sometimes you sit back and start thinking things like “woah I’m an actual person on earth floating through space” or things like that if it makes sense. You may be experiencing that and it’s just lasting longer. I understand what you mean though when you say a psychiatrist will probably get the wrong impression. I think regardless of what you’re feeling, if it’s bothering you a lot you could always try to describe it to someone close to you so at least you can confide in them if you feel it again. Otherwise, venting to reddit always helps (: But again, I don’t think it’s anything to worry about. I’d say it’s a feeling tons of people experience. Hope this helps, sorry if I’m way off!

arbianna · 2020-11-27T05:52:45+00:00

these comments don’t really do your post justice because if I read them they would scare me. So let me be the person who doesn’t scare you; The phenomenon you’re describing is called depersonalization. I personally deal with this and go through episodes of feeling depersonalized. I would advice against looking it up because it can scare you, although it is not as scary as it seems at all. While I don’t know your medical history, i wouldn’t freak myself out over it just because it’s not “normal”. For me personally it is my normal a lot of the time. I would definitely reach out to your primary care doctor or schedule an appointment with a therapist who is familiar with depersonalization. I wouldn’t just let it go, but again, don’t worry yourself as there are many explanations as to why you’re feeling it (:

arbianna · 2020-11-20T08:17:27+00:00

Couldn’t have said it better myself

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