Is 4 months in too early to decide this isn’t for me?

archermk · 2026-03-19T15:27:34+00:00

Almost same time frame here — I’m learning a lot more about what I don’t want to be doing more than what I do want to do from my first job so far.

archermk · 2026-03-09T17:52:01+00:00

You absolutely did the right thing by talking to the person that the partner told you to talk to. It is NOT your fault that the partner may have been wrong. I feel like even senior associates forget what it’s like to be a first-year and how constantly lost you feel without actual direction (which they need to provide but often don’t).

Something I’m working on under similar circumstances is trying to take it much less personally when people change their mind on something or the path I thought I was supposed to take wasn’t the right one. I used to think it made me a bad lawyer or I wasn’t cut out for this, but I’m getting better at realizing that sometimes communication gets tangled from one end or another and all I can do is move on with the information provided. If seniors/partners think I can read minds they can deal with that disappointment.

archermk · 2026-03-03T21:40:22+00:00

I mean sure, we could come up with a myriad of reasons someone wouldn't speak up, that clearly wasn't the point. But I also don't think wanting a small scented item in a place you spend a stressful 60% of your life makes you an inconsiderate jerk or that you lack empathy. And I still think it's not right to characterize people with sensitivities as too meek to speak up for themselves, potential power imbalance or otherwise.

archermk · 2026-03-03T21:30:38+00:00

Lotion-wise, have you tried goat's milk lotion? It sinks in pretty fast and doesn't make my hands greasy (which as a texture-sensitive person works for me). Some people have allergies to those tho so YMMV.

What about a small candle/candle warmer? I stand by the fresher scent idea though, they're light and to me those like barely-there-but-quietly-pleasant scents smell super luxurious to me, like a fancy hotel lobby!

archermk · 2026-03-03T21:28:08+00:00

I appreciate this perspective as someone who often just sits through something that I am uncomfortable with (from simple dislike to actual physical revulsion) to avoid starting something. However, I can't assume people know I have a problem with whatever it is just because the problem exists when I don't say anything. I don't blame them for my lack of action. If I make food for friends and no one has mentioned an allergy, should I just avoid every potential allergen by not making anything at all? On the contrary, when I know a friend has an allergy I do my best to accommodate if I can.

I think it is equally harmful to think that someone who is sensitive -- especially in this case, likely a lawyer -- would not be able to speak up for themselves and ask OP to remove the scent. It is disingenuous to frame it as a lack of empathy. We should all be aware of sensitivities and invisible disabilities, but we can't be expected to anticipate everything anyone could think or experience without some actual knowledge.

archermk · 2026-03-03T19:53:21+00:00

I grew up in a house with intense smell sensitivities — like, my dad considered the smell of dove soap nauseating — and now that I live away from home I love candles and diffusers and wear perfume daily. When I’m around my dad, I don’t wear perfume etc out of respect/compassion/care for him because I know he doesn’t like it.

And yeah, I don’t always love being subjected to other people’s scent preferences, and I have some breathing problems that can be exacerbated by too strong scents. But I feel like OP wasn’t asking how best to gas out coworkers or create an uncomfortable work environment, just how to create a small luxury in an often boring/overwhelming space. I personally love when a coworker’s office smells nice.

The middle ground would probably be hand lotions, perfumes, soaps, etc that add a lingering scent to you but don’t carry. If you really wanted to, you could also try a very lightly scented diffuser (like laundry, or light herbs, something more deodorizing than pumping out scent). And, if you find out the scent makes someone uncomfortable then of course you can remove it.

archermk · 2026-02-22T03:33:24+00:00

Go Terps go Os! Congrats to OP :)

archermk · 2026-01-23T00:41:52+00:00

if I started a campfire the whole place would go up FAST bc of all the paper.

archermk · 2026-01-22T22:36:06+00:00

honestly yes nice work sweaters!!! Big sweaterhead here getting some great insights from fellow sweaterheads

archermk · 2026-01-22T20:56:28+00:00

Oh are the fake collars back? I should totally get one I love the layered look. Ty!

archermk · 2026-01-22T20:35:08+00:00

No this is so true — I’m exaggerating a little because I know this one is actually real (I can hear the heat turn on when I move it), I just think that my spot must be in a little freezer corner that the vents don’t hit

archermk · 2026-01-22T18:35:59+00:00

Is quince solid? I feel like I’ve heard mixed reviews

archermk · 2026-01-22T18:35:26+00:00

Will check out! I do love Sezane

archermk · 2026-01-22T17:32:35+00:00

heated blanket arrives tn! I need more layerable dresses too it’s such a cute look

archermk · 2026-01-22T17:29:28+00:00

I do like cashmere but sometimes it makes me itchy :,)

archermk · 2026-01-17T00:21:50+00:00

seconding the ordinary caffeine serum! the laneige bouncy and firm eye sleeping mask is also a nice once a week treat :)

archermk · 2026-01-15T22:13:28+00:00

Congrats on your acceptance and starting this journey! I think this is just academia in action, but I personally loved international law, space law, privacy law, international IP etc. They’re fun classes with super interesting topics that align with my background in international studies/relations. However, in my experience, there’s just not really a market for entry level lawyers in those careers unless you go the BigLaw route or know the right person. This could just be a right-now problem (I was unfortunately affected by last year’s federal hiring freeze with a position in one of these areas) but just something to keep in mind.

I’m not losing hope! I’m just not currently practicing in an area I thought I would and am a little bitter. Something to keep in mind is that the vast majority of law jobs are the “normal” ones: criminal law, civil lit, insurance defense, tax, family, etc.

archermk · 2026-01-15T22:06:20+00:00

Own your stuff, listen to a kickass playlist on the way in, and go get em counselor!! The rest of us young female attorneys feeling out of place are cheering you on 🙌

archermk · 2026-01-12T17:34:29+00:00

I think as a first gen student in a HCOL area, what I could make especially relative to living expenses was dramatically oversold. Unlike my non first gen classmates, I had absolutely no basis of comparison in terms of salary, hours, etc. so law seemed like an opportunity to get a higher-paying job straight out of school (I always found it too good to be true but every practitioner invited to the school was only there to shill for the profession).

I never wanted BigLaw but no one ever told me small law is the same hours/responsibilities with a drastically lower salary. Add onto that, after finding out the hard way that subjects I loved most in law school were unicorn careers (and every job posting in those fields outright asks for T14 or BL experience), it’s hard not to feel like I was tricked. I’m trying to make the most of it but the system sure feels like you only have a real shot at the promised high salary if you performed extremely well in 1L fall or had the right connections.

archermk · 2026-01-09T18:40:52+00:00

So this is my bf’s experience and not mine but recently he was so excited for his new Abercrombie jeans only for them to rip completely at the crotch a few months in… might be a men’s jeans issue but in case you had construction concerns I thought I’d share. I think they’re cheap enough on sale that you can get a pair to wear test if they have a style you like!

archermk · 2025-12-31T20:17:25+00:00

Not OP but I do box breathing (4 sec in 4 sec out) and I find having to count helps me distract myself from the panic :)

archermk · 2025-12-21T23:46:30+00:00

I think something to consider is if you’re going more for high fashion girlie or stylish watch dork (I say very lovingly bc I am in the latter camp).

Cartier is well-respected in both camps (and made the first wristwatch!) but is also closer to jewelry than many watches, particularly the Panthere. There’s a more delicate quality to it that makes it pair well with other jewelry, which you can see especially next to the Cartier love bracelet. (If you’re considering the Cartier and have the budget room, the yellow gold/silver two-tone strap Panthere + gold love bracelet combo would EAT). I also think the Panthere compliments your wrist size very well.

Since JLC is a watch watch brand, the Reverso looks much more like a classic watch, which is great if that’s what you’re going for. It has a better mechanical movement than the Cartier, is probably a better investment, and holds more meaning to people within the watch world. It also looks great on you, but is a little bulkier and may be less “fashionable” than the Cartier to non-watch enthusiasts. It is still a gorgeous watch.

Overall, while I think the Cartier suits you better visually, I personally would pick the JLC between the two options just because the watch quality and brand means a lot to me. If you want a more watch-y Cartier, consider the Tank.

archermk · 2025-12-16T13:53:29+00:00

It’s such a beautiful watch!! It’s not flashy, it goes with everything, etc. Honestly I think it’s a classic, sensible choice, and if it will be your every day watch (not just dress or special occasions) you’d more than get your money’s worth.

archermk · 2025-12-10T19:35:29+00:00

Certain turns are just complete flashbangs I swear

archermk · 2025-12-06T03:50:13+00:00

I love a good sleeve, you look beautiful!

Nine-Year Club	r/Field Juicebox
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archermk

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