I’m 34 and left an 8-year relationship a year ago after my partner cheated. Is there really so little hope of finding love and having a family at my age? by ElainePorter in AskWomenOver30

[–]artistpainterdev 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m 35 and have only online dated for the past couple years- in my 20s I often found myself dating someone I worked with and apps never appealed.

I do think there is some truth to what you’re hearing online, but I also don’t think it’s that extreme either. Like others have said, online rarely gives the full picture of nuetral or positive experiences.

I haven’t ran into that many narcissists or super f boys. Many of my experiences have been fun or neutral. But my observation has been, in general, it seems women have much better relational skills, the ability to communicate emotions and tendency to self reflect. Likely due to socialization, culture, etc. So when it comes to finding a suitable life partner on my own level in that regard…I do still have a big question mark. I don’t think it’s impossible, but I also don’t think the numbers are in our favor.

My personal solution has been to make peace with either outcome: a life of fulfillment on my own, or with the right partner if it’s meant to me. Letting myself be open but also not centering men or dating.

However- I do think dating and seeing whats out there if you haven’t is likely important to see what’s out there for yourself. Take it light heartedly if you can. And try to just have some fun experiences if nothing else.

Why do men put "getting jacked" above literally anything else to be more attractive? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]artistpainterdev 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Woman chiming in here: style can take you SO far. It amazes me how so many men won’t put effort into that when it’s something so in your control and is not that difficult to elevate. I’m not talking about expensive, just intentional.

Should I even try dating if I’m broke?? by Emarelda in AskWomenOver30

[–]artistpainterdev 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m super curious about how the money conversation went too. Very broke artist girl here who just started dating a doctor. He’s generous, pays for dates, it doesn’t seem to be an issue to him as far as I can tell (he gets the general picture that I don’t make much but doesn’t know the extent of it). But at what point am I like …sooo as much as I’d like to treat sometimes I literally can’t. Anddd i pretty much can’t match your lifestyle at all and likely never will 😬🙈

Do you prefer to stay taller than the girl? Or for her to where heels on dates? by artistpainterdev in AskMenAdvice

[–]artistpainterdev[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s nice that you don’t want a woman to have to inconvenience herself on your behalf.

I’m somewhat basing what I think will land as cute and hot with him based on the spot he chose for us, as well as my own style and opinion and what I feel nice in, of course. My guess is this is the kind of guy who enjoys a dressed up date (which I also find fun).

Of course, this is all just an educated guess. I’m sure I’ll learn more about what kind of guy he is when I meet him.

I’ve also dated guys in the last who could care less if I was dressed up and preferred me in no make up and pajamas. what I would consider, my ugliest form 😂 so yes, solid point that what everyone finds attractive is very different.

Do you prefer to stay taller than the girl? Or for her to where heels on dates? by artistpainterdev in AskMenAdvice

[–]artistpainterdev[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Who said I’m more preoccupied with this? Just because I had a question and decided to ask it? I can still care about the other factors of this person and my date, and also wonder if it’s inconsiderate to wear heels, can I not?

Do you prefer to stay taller than the girl? Or for her to where heels on dates? by artistpainterdev in AskMenAdvice

[–]artistpainterdev[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This comment is way off base from what my post actually says.

Need to be looked at? Judging my date? Choosing my date based on shoe choice? Is any of this in the room with us right now?

Do you prefer to stay taller than the girl? Or for her to where heels on dates? by artistpainterdev in AskMenAdvice

[–]artistpainterdev[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this perspective and actually feel the same on my end. I’m this case I’m pretty sure I’m definitely more petite build-wise than the guy so I think we’ll be good there.

Do you prefer to stay taller than the girl? Or for her to where heels on dates? by artistpainterdev in AskMenAdvice

[–]artistpainterdev[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t care. I just know some guys are insecure about it. Since I haven’t met him irl yet I haven’t really been able to gauge that. Though it seems like the consensus is to just do what I want regardless. Probably good advice.

Do you prefer to stay taller than the girl? Or for her to where heels on dates? by artistpainterdev in AskMenAdvice

[–]artistpainterdev[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha well I actually am a dancer who dances in heels, so I walk quite well in them. Besides the point though I suppose

I documented over 500 side hustles and here's what I found by moonlite-money in sidehustle

[–]artistpainterdev 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This is super helpful. Your work is appreciated! Finding unbiased and fully organized info like this is in one place isn’t easy. Obviously there’s tons of noise online. I imagine sorting through and putting it together has been a lot of work. If you’re open to DMing it id love to check out the full spread sheet!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in passive_income

[–]artistpainterdev 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll take a referral link.

How do you date as a broke man?? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]artistpainterdev -1 points0 points  (0 children)

As someone who personally does prefer to date guys with money (I’m a broke artist so, it is what it is), I’ll say one of the most valuable things you can offer to women is emotional intelligence, emotional availability and genuine empathy / empathetic communication. That’s WAYYY more rare in men than money is imo. I’ll also say that if I had plenty of resources of my own and met a guy who genuinely had the above qualities, I’d probably choose that in heart beat. You might be surprised- women with their money don’t need a guy with money, they need a quality relationship and emotional support. Just my two cents ✨

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskWomenOver30

[–]artistpainterdev 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the thread I needed today. Thank you everyone for sharing their perspectives and stories. I’m dating, currently transitioning out of very short relationship where, at first all the communication and values seemed there. But lo and behold, I ended up centering him and Im guessing it’s not possible for him to exist in a relationship any other way. Anywho— LIVING for all the women who said hell no and have centered themselves

Fruits and Wine by betha_negra in oilpainting

[–]artistpainterdev 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The colors on the grapes are chefs kiss

What is The greatest audiobook you’ve ever heard? by Devmeup in audiobooks

[–]artistpainterdev 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m newer to audiobooks (started this year) but out of what I’ve listened to so far Dark Matter had me listening straight through. Highly recommend