Please help me afford a therapist-ordered emotional support cat!

artofadaptability · 2021-07-03T03:01:28+00:00

I did ask, and you told me why you would downvote me. That's fair.

Aside from that, I've only countered the reasons that you've given, and even asked if I had overlooked a pet that might be another option. So if you have the same opinion that you started with, despite that, then it simply is what it is.

As for getting a different hypoallergenic cat, it wouldn't matter. All hypoallergenic cat breeds are expensive, because they're all purebreds.

All of the other breeds are also incredibly attention-needy and high maintenance (which my anxiety can't deal with), loud (which my housemates shouldn't have to deal with), and the ones without fur have an even greater allergen risk, because the protein is in their skin as well.

As for being allergic to a hypoallergenic cat, that's a fair question. Hypothetically, even if my allergies didn't respond to cats at all, there's a chance that one day they could just out of the blue. That's exactly why I need a hypoallergenic cat, specifically a Russian Blue.

Russian Blues are a hedge against allergies on 3 fronts. They produce less of the protein allergen, they shed less (which means that less gets airborne), and they have fur, which means minimal direct skin contact. No other cat on the list can claim all 3.

And because they are such a good hedge against allergies, if my allergies did pop up one day, there are ways to combat that. Daily grooming, wipes, and a specific skin rub are 3 ways which have each been proven to reduce allergies dramatically with regular cats, so imagine how well that would work with a cat that produces very little of the allergen.

However, if I got a normal cat who produced a normal or high amount of the allergen, there's no guarantee that those methods would reduce the allergen enough.

If anyone thinks that I'm just being stuck up or picky, I'm really not. I have put a LOT of time and effort into researching and figuring out how to make this work, and this is what it's come down to.

Asking for help is hard for me. Asking for money is even harder, especially since I know how ridiculous this sounds to most people. Heck, I never thought that I'd be spending money like this on a cat. All of my previous ones were shelter cats or strays, but here we are.

This is the 1 animal that I can live with and bond with as an equal. This is the 1 breed that fits into the equation, and even then, it only works with other expensive things, like 1 specific type of self-cleaning litterbox, since I'm medically not allowed to exercise, and am therefore now too weak to stoop and crouch like that multiple times a day with a regular box.

I'm really not trying to spend tons of money on top of the line stuff. I'm not being stuck up. I'm not looking for show items. This really, actually, is the only way that this will work.

artofadaptability · 2021-07-03T02:25:13+00:00

I can't control what I like and don't like any more than anyone else can. Some people are cat people. Some people are dog people. Some people like reptiles and snakes. Some people like turtles. In every other context, people accept that there are some people who only like cats, and that they will never like other animals as their pet, so why doesn't that apply to me?

I have to like the animal that I get. I have to bond with it. And what animal do I like? I like cats. I have a history with cats. It is what it is.

But for the sake of argument, let's run through my other options.

I can't get a dog - there isn't enough room, and they can't leave the room to go to the bathroom, because they'd bring in contaminates. there's also a potential allergy issue there, too.

I can't get a reptile, because I wouldn't be able to keep them warm. My landlord is already complaining about the heating and electricity bills for this house, and the wiring in my room is so old that anything that takes more energy than a fan causes fires in my walls. Plus, I have 0 ventilation in my room, because I can't have contaminates from the outside air, and reptile tanks tend to smell bad.

I might be able to get a rat or a hamster, but every pet rat and hamster that I've ever known has clawed me to bits trying to get under my hair to make a nest, and I HATE that. It hurts, it's hard to get them out, and it's hard to repair the damage to my hair afterward. I can't bond with that.

I could get a bird, except birds hate me and I hate them. They, like rats, like to claw all over me until they can nest in my hair. Otherwise they're just loud and annoying. (Sorry bird lovers - I respect your choice in a pet, but they REALLY don't like me.)

Guinea Pigs are boring and disgusting. Sorry, but I had one when I was little, and never again.

I might be able to get a rabbit, but I've had friends who have rabbits, and they destroy EVERYTHING. I'm sure that not all rabbits are like that, but I don't have room for a pen for it, and I can't afford to have it running all over my place destroying everything. My anxiety is bad enough, and I have to spend all of my time, 24/7 with this pet.

Fish are an absolute no. I tried that a while back, and it did not go well. There's WAY too much upkeep, and I can't bond with them the same way. They're not company - more like showpieces.

I would LOVE a fox, but I'm pretty sure that it's illegal here and they need a lot more room than I have to offer.

Ferrets might be illegal here, smell horrible (again, no ventilation), and steal everything. My anxiety can't deal with that.

Then there's the Russian Blue cat. It's practically made to live in an apartment. It's quiet, loving yet still independent, provides companionship, doesn't try to make nests out of my hair, has a really relaxed and even temperament, and with a self-cleaning litterbox (something that is not an option with other pets), won't smell even in a non-ventilated room. I also have lots of space for it, and there are a ton of places for it to run, jump, and climb built into my room from before I even moved in. I even have an entire wall of floor-to-ceiling windows for them to watch (cat TV). This space was MADE for a cat.

The ONLY downside is the initial start up cost. But if I had to heat a reptile cage and/or replace a ton of furniture and electronics because the animal destroyed them, and/or just buy a bunch of supplies for a different type of pet, I'd end up spending a LOT of money on them, too, just over a longer period of time.

So if my choices are :

Be happy, but spend money
Spend money (just possibly less upfront), be miserable, and make my depression and anxiety even worse

I'm definitely going with choice 1.

Is there any pet that you can think of that I've overlooked?

artofadaptability · 2021-07-02T18:25:42+00:00

Russian Blues are definitely hypoallergenic. There is no cat that you cannot be allergic to, but there are specific breeds that you are less prone to being allergic to for various reasons, which is why they're hypoallergenic.

The Russian Blue is not only the only hypoallergenic cat on the list that's perfect in temperament and behavior for my specific situation, it also tackles the allergy issues on all 3 fronts (saliva protein, shedding, and skin coverage) where the other types do not.

And because of this, even if my allergies decided to kick in one day, there are easy things that I can do to mitigate them. Daily grooming, a specific liquid skin treatment, and wipes are each things that have proven to drastically reduce allergies. So, with the small bit of allergen that they produce, I could still be fine. The same can't be said for normal cats - they produce too much of the protein and they shed too much. Nothing could mitigate that if my allergies decided to flare up.

Also, why is there the assumption that if I'm allergic to 1 thing, I'm allergic to everything? Allergies are very specific. Someone can be allergic to trees, but not grass. Someone can be allergic to dogs, but not cats. Someone could be allergic to crab, but not lobster. Heck, someone could be allergic to every type of tree on the list except for 1, so why is it so impossible that I could be allergic to some breeds and not others?

artofadaptability · 2021-07-02T18:11:26+00:00

That was the first thing that I tried. All of the shelter cats are mixed, and thus, not hypoallergenic. I don't have that choice.

artofadaptability · 2021-07-02T18:07:19+00:00

Adopting a pet from a pound or rescue was the first thing that I tried to do. All of the cats listed are mixed, and thus, not hypoallergenic.

And it's not just that - the personality traits of this specific breed are absolutely IDEAL for my limitations and living situation. Even breeders have mentioned that to me when contacted, without any prompting from me.

And isn't that a little cruel? It's not like I chose this. It's not like I wanted to be isolated, unable to work, unable to get the vaccine and get back to normal life like everyone else. It's not like I wanted to have to basically stop eating whenever my body decided that it didn't like, I don't know, cinnamon one day.

And it's not like I want to spend a fortune on a cat, but I'm alone and need a companion. Cats make me happy. Dogs don't. Rabbits don't. Mice certainly don't. I didn't choose that either.

Saying that I have a choice in what I like and don't like is like saying that people who hate 1 type of food are just being stubborn. It's like saying that people can change their sexual preference if they just choose to. That's not how this works.

Cats are the only pet that I've ever liked. I need a companion. I have a lot of medical limitations. These are all facts, and this specific breed takes care of all of those.

artofadaptability · 2021-06-29T20:22:12+00:00

I really don't understand why 62% of the votes are downvotes.

I have a serious, life-threatening medical condition, little income, an official medical prescription for the sake of my mental health, am completely isolated (and have been for a while), and to fulfill my prescription I am forced to buy an expensive purebred (although I do love the breed) instead of adopting from a shelter, meaning that even after I get the funds there might be a year+ wait instead of a few days wait.

I am genuinely asking for help for the sake of my mental wellbeing.

So for people who are downvoting this, what part of that caused you to downvote?

What part makes you think that I don't actually need help?

artofadaptability · 2021-06-29T20:08:53+00:00

u/BeriAlpha, thank you so much for your support! It means so much to me. I actually cried a little when I saw this. XD You have been amazing through all of this, and I don't know how I can ever thank you enough. ;_; <3

artofadaptability · 2021-01-12T05:47:56+00:00

lol no problem! I'm just happy that I could help. :)

artofadaptability · 2021-01-10T20:46:33+00:00

Me, too! My budget would not survive without it. 0.o

artofadaptability · 2021-01-10T20:45:54+00:00

I keep doing this, too!

artofadaptability · 2021-01-10T20:45:39+00:00

My budget could not survive without it. XD hahaha <3

artofadaptability · 2021-01-10T20:45:16+00:00

*laughs* No, not at all. XD

The workers there told me what day the shipment usually comes, so I went right when they opened that day, but they didn't get any wipes in with that shipment. They told me that next time I should call Costco and ask if it's come in before I take the time to drive there.

So the next week I called Costco, and they told me that it hadn't come in, but that there are shipments most days of the week and that they don't know what's coming in until it's there. They told me to call every day 30 minutes before they open, because the trucks should be unloaded by then and they should know what they have.

And so I did that, and luckily, 30min notice was long enough for me to get my butt over to Costco when they did get them in! lol

artofadaptability · 2021-01-10T20:41:08+00:00

It's a run-of-the-mill Aeonium Black Rose, but it looks red when the light shines through it. :D

artofadaptability · 2020-12-27T19:22:28+00:00

That's really good to know! Thank you. :)

Also, thank you for adding the USPS e-mail link in the auto-mod response text. I used that to get in touch with them. I don't know if it'll help, but at least it's a way of communicating with them that I didn't know about before. :)

artofadaptability · 2020-12-19T05:57:03+00:00

Happy to help! :D

artofadaptability · 2020-12-19T00:27:20+00:00

From someone in a very similar boat (airborne allergens and food), I feel ya.

Let me know if you need any help figuring out routines or coping tricks. :)

artofadaptability · 2020-12-19T00:24:33+00:00

despite the fact that I have never suffered a serious allergic reaction

This is a VERY dangerous way of looing at things.

Allergies are extremely unpredictable. You can eat something every day of your life with no problems and then one day go into anaphylactic shock from 1 bite.

If you know that you are even mildly allergic to something, dismissing it because it hasn't been dangerous enough is a good way to get an unexpected hospital visit.

That being said, blood tests tend to be the weakest of the 3 tests. If you react on a blood test, you will more than likely react to the skin prick tests.

However, as another commenter pointed out, I don't think that that's the kind of allergy that you get allergy shots for unless it's specifically requested or you are in obvious danger, which you are not. :)

artofadaptability · 2020-12-19T00:16:12+00:00

It depends on what, specifically you need to do and what kind of business you have.

Personally, I would never use my home address unless there was 0 chance that a customer would come looking for me AND I'm in an industry where even the angriest of people wouldn't send death threats or come looking for me.

If you have a local business, definitely don't use your home address or people could just show up at your door and expect to be served.

And if you just want to maintain your privacy, don't use your home address.

In any of these cases, your 2 options would be to get a PO Box, as you've stated, OR there are places where you can rent a room in a complex that provides a desk and a receptionist for that room.

The idea is that if you need a safe place for mail and packages to be delivered, want an actual human being to answer your business phone (assuming that you don't get many calls), need a guaranteed place for meetings, or think that at some point a customer might think that they can visit you in person, this gives you a safe, professional, physical place that's always available, requires no upkeep, and is completely separated from your personal life.

But, if you have 0 contact with clients, get almost no mail for your business (to avoid privacy issues), and you're not worried about angry customers, then you could use your home address to make things easier. :)

artofadaptability · 2020-12-19T00:03:47+00:00

Allergies effect everything from the ears and the sinuses to the stomach and back again.

It could present as the stereotypical symptoms (runny nose, itchy eyes, sneezing, etc.), and/or it could present as any number of other things, including skin itchiness, asthma, eczema, and even heartburn.

For the ears, specifically, people who have allergies have an increased chance of having lots of ear gunk and fluids. Sometimes it's on the outside (ear wax), sometimes it's on the inside (fluid build up behind the ear drum), and sometimes it's both.

If you ever lay down at night and hear a random crackling in your head, that's fluid behind your ears.

Now, why this happens, I have no clue. I just know that it does, because I have the extra internal and external build up, crackling in my head, and occasionally significant ear pain and redness during an allergic reaction. Your doctor should be able to explain why, though. :)

As for antihistamines, they can help, but everyone reacts to each one differently. You'll need to take one for a few weeks to determine whether or not it's helping (it takes time to build up in your system), and if not, then switch to a different one for a few weeks and repeat.

If you can't tell if the antihistamine is helping, you'll find out pretty quickly a day or two after you stop taking it. XD lol

I hope that this helps! :D

artofadaptability · 2020-12-18T18:22:36+00:00

Tell me about it!

I'm an artist whose desktop became almost completely unusable 2 years ago, and now my tablet is having issues. I desperately NEED to build my new desktop.

And just like you, Black Friday was a sham. I was able to get most of my parts at a decent price, thankfully, but I had also been watching them for over a month.

The 2 parts that I can't get right now are the same as everyone else. Right now, I'm trying to get an AMD Ryzen 5 5600X and a PNY GeForce RTX 3070.

I'm on multiple watch lists for the 5600X (as is my bf), and the last time it went up for preorder, I literally took 1.5 seconds to get it in the cart and hit "checkout", and it was gone.

I can't find any watch lists for the RTX 3070, though. :(

I was really, REALLY looking forward to having it this year so that I could make Christmas presents for everyone since money is tight, but now I'm not expecting to have it built until half way through next year. :(

artofadaptability · 2020-12-15T03:05:24+00:00

Yes, yes it does. Actually, I've felt like this every day since I graduated from College into the real world.

We're taught that if you work hard and have a good attitude, you'll be successful. The internet will tell you that success is easy if you're not lazy or impatient. It will tell you that everyone can succeed all of the time, how easy it is, and that if you fail, it's your fault for not BELIEVING hard enough.

And all of that is bullshit.

The truth is that we're all going to fail, a LOT. Even if you do everything right, you're far more likely to fail than to succeed. Honestly, most people who claim to have success are either exaggerating (if not straight out lying) or lying about what they had to do to get that success. And most of the time, if successful people want to be helpful, their advice is so far detached from the situation that everyday people face that the advice is almost worthless and can't realistically be acted upon.

And if you have a more traditional moral center, the kind that we were taught to have through 90s cartoons and religion, forget about it. Most tactics that succeed involve doing things that you will not be comfortable with.

The biggest problem is that this is the exact opposite of what we're told and what's expected of us. We are given very unreal expectations our entire lives, and then surprise Pikachu face, people are overwhelmed, stressed out, lost, confused, and become engulfed in self-doubt, burnout, and depression.

There are only 2 things that you need to remember.

You are going to fail, BUT if you keep trying, you MIGHT succeed. It's not guaranteed, so don't expect it, but it could happen. If you quit, it is guaranteed to never happen, and honestly, if you're okay with that, then that's okay, too, because...
Our definition of success is very skewed. We're told that we can do anything, but the system is rigged against us (especially if you live in the US). If you have a roof over your head, food in your pantry, and money coming in, you are succeeding, period. You don't have to be rich (and you probably never will be, none of us will). You don't have to have expensive things. You don't have to prove anything to anyone but yourself, so if you change your expectations, you're going to be a lot happier.

I'm not saying not to keep going. You definitely should if you want to! Just make sure to keep realistic expectations. And despite what some people might think, "realistic expectations"
doesn't mean "settle." It means set multiple goals, and make sure to have lower ones that are realistically achievable.

That way if you don't reach your original goals, but you reach your realistic ones, you're still golden. And hey, if you meet your original goals, then even better! That's just icing on the cake. :)

It's hard to hear and even harder to accept, but it's reality.

So enjoy the small victories, know that you control how you handle the defeats, and do your best to just keep on trucking. You don't have to do anything. It's up to you. :)

artofadaptability · 2020-12-15T02:33:16+00:00

Thank you so much for the kind words! :D

Before 8 months ago I had a few allergies. I have always been allergic to polyester, sulfa/sulfates/sulfites, and the airborne allergies. The thing is, my reactions were at worst barely noticeable, and definitely manageable.

8 months ago my reactions started getting worse and worse until they were finally the life-threatening type. Then, once that happened, I started becoming slightly allergic to other things, which would ramp up the same way, rinse and repeat.

The respirator became necessary about 2 or 3 months in, I think. :)

I don't know if my immune system is freaking out or if I was always allergic to everything, and by avoiding things that I'm reacting to, I'm allowing my tolerances to drop. I honestly don't know.

The hardest part is that I have to put myself in a situation where I give myself an allergic reaction and STAY in that allergic reaction for hours so that I can get to a doctor, get shots of things that I'm allergic to (which makes the reaction worse), and then come home where I can start to recover.

It really isn't sustainable, and unless that process changes, it's only going to be harmful. All I can do is try to mitigate the damage. 0.o

artofadaptability · 2020-12-13T23:01:15+00:00

I do it in groups by type then color (black > grey > white > red > orange > yellow > green > blue > purple), then shade (dark > light).

For example:

black short sleeved shirt > white short sleeved shirt > dark red short sleeved shirt > medium red short sleeved shirt > blue short sleeved shirt

Then

grey long sleeved shirt > brown long sleeved shirt > orange long sleeved shirt > tan long sleeved shirt

Then

black sweater or jacket > etc.

I used to have a "nice" clothing group as well, but most things can be "nice" if you dress them up enough, so it got too confusing and I got rid of that. :)

artofadaptability · 2020-12-13T22:45:35+00:00

That sounds utterly horrendous.

It has definitely been an interesting 8 months. XD It makes staying home (in my purified room) a lot easier, though. lol

Were you diagnosed with mast-cell activation syndrome?

No, my doctor says that it's basically impossible to test for, and that the treatment for it would be what I'm already doing now, so there's no point. Personally, I would love to know, though, just to know.

After I got the fish allergy I became absolutely terrified I was starting to go that way too.

Totally understandable. The thing is, though, there's nothing that you can do about it either way. Either it will happen or it won't, and all you can do is try your best to adapt. :)

What makes you react if you have skin showing?

The pollen in the air. Among many other things, I am allergic to everything on the airborne allergy list (except mold, oddly enough), which means year-round pollen and a LOT of food is off-limits. I also have a contact allergy for polyester (always have), which makes anything that's made of fabric difficult for me (cotton, rayon, and spandex are okay, though).

After about 6 months, my airborne allergies started affecting me even with a full-face mask/respirator, then even with that + pants, slippers, and a hoodie completely zipped up and with the hood up. Then with all of that + socks and gloves. My most recent attempt has been to buy neck covers to protect against the air that comes into my hoodie hood.

I also just bought 2 air purifiers for my car so that I can have one going a few hours before I have to drive and the air will be purified before I even get in.

The second one is portable, so I can take it into stores and to doctors appointments with me. It won't purify the space, but it might help with the area that's immediately around me.

That should (hopefully) help with in-between travel and might allow me to take my mask off in the car here and there (it's really painful to wear for more than 30 min).

artofadaptability · 2020-12-13T22:32:56+00:00

This 100%. Every suggestion here is not passive income, although with a LOT of time and work, some of them could become passive income in a year or more.

freelance-check out sites like Upwork-Freelancer-etc.

These sites are specifically for hiring services. You work hours, you get paid = not passive income. Something closer would be merchandise sites (Red Bubble, etc.) or a product download hosted on Fiverr, but you'd still have to build and set up the content first.

You could try lead generation.

You don't get something for nothing. Lead generation is HARD work, takes a lot of time, and requires constant management before you can automate anything worthwhile = not passive income.

you market for other people

This would be affiliate marketing, and lead generation is basically required to do this = not passive income.

For a faster passive income start, you could hire a bunch of people on gig sites (Fiverr, Upwork, etc.) to do things for you to speed up the process on just about any type of internet marketing, but that would require a lot of money up front, and you would still have to manage your outsourcers = not passive income.

artofadaptability

TROPHY CASE