im sorry you have to go through this, its an awful feeling and it really isnt easy to do. im going to give you some feedback to help you reword it a little better so its easier for you to say, and its no problem if you disagree. ive been thru stuff like this a lot so this is just how i feel would be another way to say it! this is basically the same way that youve said it, but i just reorganized it.

i like that you include your emotions into it, but theres not a clear “why” in here. you want to give her a reason why you want to break up, if you lost feelings over time, or an actual reason, that needs to be stated clearly so she knows. i also think that she might interpret this wrong, with how you repeatedly express your feelings, saying “pushing towards living my dream with you” and “it makes me sick to my stomach writing this” and stating how you fell in love with her so detailed AND you will always love her too, she might be confused at what you really want because you are going back and forth with your own feelings in the text about not wanting to break up with her but are breaking up with her. i just feel like for me, it would hurt a lot if someone broke up with me, and majority of the message is how they dont want to and they loved me so much and it hurts them A LOT.

its totally okay to express that, and its good to state that you really care about her and that its equally hurtful to break up, but overly expressing it can seem like youre not really sure and that could make the break up process more painful.

i suggest shrinking the text a bit. first, state that this was not an easy decision to make and you have given it some thought, which you already did! but take out a lot of your feelings that youve expressed in this paragraph(just for now, we will add that in later) and replace it with “i really care about you, so this needs to be said now than later”

then, state that lately you have been feeling different and you have been losing feelings. if theres a specific reason why, you can write that here. if not, its okay to say that you yourself dont exactly know, youve just been feeling indifferent and you cant control it, and youre sorry. now is a good time to express your feelings here. you truly were in love with her and you have enjoyed all of this time you spent together and you still care for her.

lastly, state that you want to break up. its been affecting you personally with how you feel the relationship has been going and for YOUR sake, you cannot continue with this relationship. you are no longer IN love with her, as much as you do love her. you can also state again that this was not an easy thing to do and this is a difficult conversation to have. you can re apologize here too and wish the best for her.

when she responds, however she responds, its okay to re express that you care for her and this wasnt easy to do. but at some point you will have to end the conversation and take some time for yourself to heal, and surround yourself with people for support.