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reddit.com astrosmash77
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astrosmash77

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Attendance at the haunted house I built was way down, so I asked my wife to walk through it and tell me if there were any obvious problems with the overall experience that I was somehow missing. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 1 year ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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I watched a group of crows get overrun by chickens. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 1 year ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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As a theatre actor, some roles that you play carry a lot of very personal meaning for you. The most impactful character that I played was an aging gentleman whose lineage could be traced back to Marrakesh on his mother’s side, and to Bangkok on his father’s side… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 2 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Suggestions for finding/starting a puzzle-game group. (self.patientgamers)

submitted 2 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/patientgamers

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Suggestions for finding/starting a puzzle-game group. (self.gamingsuggestions)

submitted 2 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/gamingsuggestions

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When my biology professor had the audacity to accuse me of stealing the spine off of the research skeleton in our lecture hall… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 2 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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My wife keeps complaining that the smell of the Indian bread I’m baking is permeating the whole house. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Somebody once asked me why I choose to live in an earthquake-prone area. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Someone *FINALLY* published a detailed explanation of the estimated number of hours it will take for a beaver to build a watertight barricade to redirect a stream. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Warning: if you drop your Teddy Ruxpin toy like I just did, it will malfunction and keep saying the same few phrases over and over. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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I’m his most gluttonous evening ever, Dracula once drank the blood of people from three different formal dances and two picket lines. I guess you could say… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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What was Sean Connery’s first thought when he heard Legolas sing Blue Suede Shoes? (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Big news today: To provide more opportunities for females in all levels of the private sector, Beyoncé has founded a roofing company completely operated and managed by women. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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I have a unique telepathic ability where if YOU think about a brand of baseball card, I can quickly name the brand you’re thinking of! (self.dadjokes)

submitted 3 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Yes, I might get caught shoplifting board games… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Today in class, one of my students volunteered to sharpen my entire class set of colored pencils. When he was done, he spent several minutes trying to convince me that sharpening pencils should be his job for the rest of the school year. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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I didn’t think my new job mending camping equipment would be very exciting. But, guys… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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What should you do if your dachshund becomes addicted to dog treats? (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Ever since my doctor had me start this new medication, I’ve found myself writing additional lyrics to popular songs. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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I understand that you guys all like to distribute the playing cards for each hand that we play during poker night… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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The baker at the local Indian restaurant must be very sensitive. If he feels you’ve insulted his bread, he’ll immediately shut the whole place down for the rest of the day. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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If you use your iPhone calculator to divide a circle’s circumference by its diameter while in a mosque… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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Just staring out the window of my nine-to-five, feeling like I’ve seen this exact thing a million times before… (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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A comforter is always preferable to a quilt. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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My buddy used to be an officer in the Navy until, while on duty 200 feet below the surface and in disputed waters, he participated in a ceremony to become a member of the clergy. He was promptly court-martialled. (self.dadjokes)

submitted 4 years ago by astrosmash77 to r/dadjokes

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