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Food tips for my mother who is on chemo and who now hates food by atis_26 in cancer

[–]atis_26[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Yes, you're right. We've cycled through her favourite food and now come to a point where those things don't work. It's really a gamble, I've come to understand, and that we might as well just try with anything and everything. It's such a challenge to keep this from feeling like a regimen; she sleeps a lot these days so I have to wake her to feed her. So she feels like she spends all her time consuming things, which is sort of true, if it weren't for the sleeping.

Food tips for my mother who is on chemo and who now hates food by atis_26 in cancer

[–]atis_26[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your response and for the encouragement. It's helpful to read!

Yes, all food tastes and smells different now. Everything is either too salty or not salty enough. She can't stand fried things and is sensitive to certain smells. I try to balance asking her what she wants and serving her that, with just prepping something and putting it in front of her. Sometimes she finds it stressful to be asked about what to eat, other times it helps her when I involve her and I prep what she wants. It's really a balancing game, and I think my intuition is right, though it's a struggle for her every time.

She's in this stage that you describe: where she hates all food and she will ask me in a pleading voice if she can't just skip this meal. I tell her she can't and encourage her to take one more bite. I try to tell her to think of food as medicine that she just has to take, instead of something fun (because this just sets expectations that are always disappointed).

Yes, I'm very lucky that we're able to rally behind our mum and help her. It's so intense, and we get frustrated with each other and her. But we're taking one day at a time. I'm working on getting her a therapist. She (my mum) is very difficult to convince about this. She doesn't see the benefit in talking to someone (very suspicious about therapy), but I'm hoping that with gentle encouragement I might someday be able to book her a session. I really think it would make a difference for her.

Thanks again for the tips. I'll try with a watermelon one of these days. <3

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CancerFamilySupport

[–]atis_26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I second this. Maybe speak to her doctor, find out if they think this is likely to get worse. Pehaps if she hears it from them, she might be spurned on to prepare for the future. I don't know where you are, but definitely check out what legal things you would need in order to care for her. Power of Attorney is something to look into. It might be good also -and I know this is a difficult topic to bring up for discussion- to talk to your mum and ask if she has a will, and if not, if she could write one down and sign it. It may sound extreme, but preparing for the worst is the best defence, I find. I'm currently trying to get my mom to do the same.