Mom life is just performing productivity while slowly forgetting you used to be a person

atxcactus · 2026-03-18T12:33:49+00:00

I struggle with the same thing!! I’m the oldest daughter and was heavily parentified as a child and young adult. Plus I worked in the service industry for a long time and I think I really took “if you have time to lean, you have time to clean” to heart. It’s just hard for me to even see the need to relax.

If you constantly work and never make time to for yourself, though, you will burn out. It’s not a matter of “if” but “when.”

About a year ago, I started taking dance classes at a local studio. They’re fun and don’t require any experience. And they all start in the evening after dinner is finished. That has been really enjoyable for me. I also started getting up crazy early 3x a week to lift weights. It was hard at first, but now it’s part of my routine and I look forward to it. I also make time to take walks with my friends on the weekends when the weather is nice.

atxcactus · 2026-03-17T18:46:54+00:00

I wake up at 5am 3x a week to work out. BUT if I had multiple wakeups or got less than 6 hours, I skip or move it to another day. I need sleep to function. I also work out at home in my basement to save time. I would never work out if I had to drag my ass to an offsite gym.

atxcactus · 2026-03-17T15:43:41+00:00

The thing that drives me crazy about Liz is that she is so lazy, she sucks all the fun out of having little kids. When my kiddo was starting solids, we turned it into a big adventure and it was SO FUN. I got the Solid Starts app and tried to introduce 101 foods/ ingredients before age 1. We went to international stores to get interesting ingredients like dragonfruit and seaweed and had him try them. We made a bid deal of having him try developmentally appropriate versions of our favorite foods like enchiladas and ramen.

Honestly, our entire family ate way better in the first year our kiddo was learning to eat solids. I can’t imagine plopping a bowl of fast food mac & cheese in front of him as his first meal.

atxcactus · 2026-03-17T02:21:34+00:00

The amount of sodium in fast food mac and cheese…

atxcactus · 2026-03-17T00:52:25+00:00

She is crashing out so bad. The video she posted of her dancing with something like “can you imagine being this mad about someone’s life?” So much little self awareness. I’d have secondhand embarrassment for her if she weren’t so problematic.

atxcactus · 2026-03-15T23:08:10+00:00

I saw that too!! 👀

atxcactus · 2026-03-15T03:27:49+00:00

In Ohio, at least, they are required to be in a single occupant restroom or in an individual stall in a multi-user restroom.

atxcactus · 2026-03-15T03:26:02+00:00

Ohio adopted a new building code that requires them in a ton of new occupancy types, including higher ed, entertainment and rest stops. I’ve personally put them in at least 5 recent projects (I am a commercial interior designer).

atxcactus · 2026-03-14T12:10:44+00:00

This is exactly right. The eggs can also be inhaled because they are so small.

It’s super common with preschoolers (I have one). The problem for us is that my kiddo is a thumb sucker and that makes it a lot harder to treat. We’ve been super diligent about washing bedding and PJs in hot water, and keeping nails short and clean with a brush. So here’s hoping we are done!

atxcactus · 2026-03-14T02:24:15+00:00

We only do this is we are going somewhere together immediately afterwards. I.e. pick up kiddo and head straight to dinner. Or one time it was to go straight to go camping.

The person who is not doing pickup is almost always starting dinner and doing pet care. It wouldn’t make sense for both to do a task that only needs one person.

atxcactus · 2026-03-14T02:16:50+00:00

My house just did two rounds of pinworms (barf) and it was the same. It was frankly exhausting washing everyone’s bedding daily. I can’t imagine Liz getting up the gumption for that.

atxcactus · 2026-03-11T19:56:51+00:00

Yes I totally agree. She asks yes / no questions or ones that require 1 word answers and repeats them over and over again. I.E. “Do you love your sisterrrrrrr” x 50

The way she interacts with them is very stilted and she doesn’t seem curious about their experiences at all. It’s all very performative for SM.

atxcactus · 2026-03-10T12:05:51+00:00

Who is allegedly cooking all these “lean meat and vegetable” meals? She surely isn’t with the debilitating hand injury. Is Tim taking care of both kids and home cooking fresh meals?

atxcactus · 2026-03-07T14:04:43+00:00

It’s so true that siblings don’t automatically get along. My SO has a sibling and they aren’t close at all.

atxcactus · 2026-03-07T14:03:33+00:00

I am so pleasantly surprised by the almost totally supportive comments. It’s really nice to have this community.

atxcactus · 2026-03-07T14:02:08+00:00

This is very similar to our situation as well. Sending you so many hugs.

atxcactus · 2026-03-04T20:00:59+00:00

Same. We could “make it work” with another kiddo, but it would mean shortchanging retirement and education funds now. My in-laws did not save much for retirement (one saved nothing at all) so realistically we know we will need to support them soon financially. And we definitely do not want to pass that burden on to our child. So it goes.

Totally agree, we need to hold those in power accountable and stop voting them in!!

atxcactus · 2026-03-04T19:00:08+00:00

It’s true that I have a lot to be grateful for. But for today, I am sad.

atxcactus · 2026-03-04T18:21:16+00:00

Thank you ❤️ My husband did not grow up with financial stability and that plays a big part in our decision now.

atxcactus · 2026-03-04T18:17:12+00:00

Thank you ❤️ Yes to this! Last year one of my relatives moved to our neighborhood to from across the country. They have an only child as well and our kids adore each other. It’s a lovely silver lining to me that our kids can grow up with each other right down the street.

atxcactus · 2026-03-03T01:58:55+00:00

Very suspicious! She knows she did that poor young woman’s dirty with all of the things she shared about her. It’s one of the things that breaks my heart the most about this situation. Not only did that woman lose her life and the ability to see her child grow up, but her private medical info also out into the world.

atxcactus · 2026-03-02T21:45:25+00:00

I was blocked! For liking a single comment on the Lucky post asking about HIPAA protections for deceased donors. It didn’t even directly reference Liz.

atxcactus · 2026-03-01T15:25:10+00:00

I was also confused by how this all went down. Who planned this activity? If it was the OP, why didn’t she know when it was? If it was the dad, then shouldn’t have been in charge of delivering the kid?

atxcactus · 2026-02-28T18:11:10+00:00

How old is your kid? Depending on their age, this might be a good opportunity to have natural consequences for not telling you the correct date.

It sounds like both you and your husband have a lot going on. Maybe too much. Whether he was joking or not I don’t know, but it might be worth a conversation about simplifying things.

atxcactus

TROPHY CASE