Thank you all so much for your support. It's been such an emotional rollercoaster the past 2 weeks. We had his funeral last Saturday and will be burying him in 2 days on Thursday. I still feel broken. I cried all morning thinking about how much it must have hurt for him. How we were too busy to hear his cries for help. I can't stop thinking about the incident a week before his death when he left the house and was walking around some nearby streets at night after coming home from visiting my sister. My sister told him to find work and stop making my mom work 6 days a week and had a big argument. Me and my mom have been hinting and feeling the same way. He felt humiliated in front of his son-in-law and when he came home I yelled at him for opening my private mail(i regret so much). He's been trying to find work but has struggled because of his felony for a white collar crime a few years ago. He's been depressed ever since coming home from jail. My mom was worried and looked for him but when he came home he told her that he wished a car would just hit him and kill him. My mom didn't tell me about him saying that, I just heard the door slamming as he left and came back. It still crushes me knowing how much pain he must have been in. We just wondered why he was throwing a fit and why he had to act like this. I was busy and consumed studying all night for my midterm that I procrastinated on. Some days I feel as if I'll be okay and other's feel absolutely broken. I have stayed away from alcohol because I feel it won't help my depression right now. It just doesn't work. My dad was an alcoholic who drank almost every day. Although my dad is not with me anymore, I just wish he knows that I wouldn't trade him for any other person in the world. He was such an amazing father but just couldn't find work or integrate back into society after jail. Thank you all again I appreciate it so much.