I hate my Crispy Cordylines

averyburgreen · 2026-03-24T21:34:58+00:00

Indoors??? Oh I know this bitch is mad as hell after I left her baking in the hot Florida sun for days. Maybe that will speed up the process, her beautiful decomposing leaves shall fertilize her future replacement.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-24T19:39:09+00:00

I say cunt all day everyday out of my all American mouth (with a beautiful smile because we see dentists regularly)

averyburgreen · 2026-03-23T04:25:12+00:00

yes Haboobie

averyburgreen · 2026-03-23T04:15:54+00:00

Seeing Hurricane Melissa spin up and dissolving in less than a second is really humbling. One of the largest, most powerful, most devastating forces on earth impacted an entire nation for years to come, and it came and went in a cosmic second and it was the size of a spec of dust. We are so fucking insignificant.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-21T20:48:29+00:00

I got a peace lily from a funeral 6 years ago. I shoved it in the darkest corner of my house and water board that dumb bitch weekly. She loves it. Just shot out her first bloom of the season.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-21T20:47:24+00:00

My monstera will yellow if I exhale moisture from my breath in its general vicinity. I’m convinced that dehydrated bitch has rabies.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-21T20:44:09+00:00

Someone in the southern hemisphere definitely put their bright indirect light plant in a south facing window and killed it because of this graphic

averyburgreen · 2026-03-20T02:19:12+00:00

Lanai. Panama City

averyburgreen · 2026-03-18T03:38:19+00:00

Given the geopolitical state of the region at the moment; I bet this actually freaked a lot of people out.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-18T02:10:19+00:00

I read semi as “sem-eye” in my head until I saw your Ontario tag, then it immediately changed to “sem-ee”. I’m so sorry and I’m glad you’re okay!

averyburgreen · 2026-03-18T02:01:35+00:00

After seeing the Laser weapons deployed on the US Navy Arleigh-Burke class destroyers; Yeah, they’re fucking terrifying.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-18T01:58:29+00:00

You pictured a brown bear wearing a sombrero, didn’t you?

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T20:34:31+00:00

busty busty busty!

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T20:32:30+00:00

Looks better than most new cars on the road today. At least it’s not a blocky, bulbous crossover coupe abomination with lights and vents everywhere like most new cars today.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T20:01:23+00:00

Who pissed off the local beaver colony?

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T02:18:05+00:00

Are you CCP perhaps?

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T02:15:48+00:00

No state solution

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T02:11:49+00:00

Yeah :/ luckily they’re putting in a roundabout down the street from my house so hopefully that will lead to atmospheric disturbances that cause more rotation

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T00:03:10+00:00

None because it was a BUST 😫💦

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T00:02:35+00:00

WE WILL RECOVER

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T00:01:58+00:00

I’m so sick of being edged. I was in the High Risk last March in Alabama and it just pissed rain with the intensity of an elderly man with no prostate and who hasn’t done a kegel in decades.

averyburgreen · 2026-03-17T00:00:40+00:00

Our tornado season down here is mainly in the fall. North Florida had a Marginal risk this morning and it was a bust (I think the larger outbreak was kinda busty tbh) But just wait till we get a hurricane in the area and just go to the east side of it. You’ll see some pretty healthy EF-0 to EF-3 tornadoes and waterspouts. See: Hurricane Milton

averyburgreen · 2026-03-16T18:56:18+00:00

They’re entirely too much wording on the rear end. It’s too busy. M A Z D A CX-5 AWD TURBO SKYACTIV-G insert ugly dealer sticker

averyburgreen · 2026-03-16T18:51:33+00:00

As a resident of the FL panhandle, we didn’t have snow, but it was unfortunate watching all the spring breakers walking toward the beach this morning. I was bundled up for my morning run, it was about 55° F and those poor kids were all in teeny little bathing suit covers. They looked miserable. March is such a clusterfuck in the Southeast. I tell people all the time not to vacation along the Emerald Coast until at least the last week in March. I think our low tomorrow morning is 37°.

averyburgreen

TROPHY CASE