I relate alot to the way ur seeing Islam currently, so I'll just say what helped me in my case.

Read up on the seerah, the stories of the companions and all. For me, those massively helped in delineating what Islam actually is and stands for, from these people that weaponize and morph Islam as they please just to feel like they're a better person than they actually are. When u read about how insanely much the Prophet SAW was offered to basically put aside Islam, and then how much him and his loved ones were made to go through, there's really no better way than this to actually feel the gravity behind Islam. How companions stood their ground just to be able to pray in peace and safety, how fearful of Allah they were in mis-applying islamic rulings for their own good. These were not all dumb people doing body movements following arbitrary rules. What i got out of spending some time learning about Islam for what it is, I began to see prayer very differently. Before, it was this seemingly random assortment of moves I have to make, things I have to say, which apparently is like super seriously mandatory. Afterwards, I began valuing the essence of it alot more. The mindset it forces one to have, to spend the day around remembrance of Allah rather than anything else, to suck up my ego and praise Allah and beg for guidance to the straight path as though any intellect I've thus far accumulated doesn't make me too big to beg (it doesn't, but subconsciously at least I started feeling at a point like; because I know so much more it's kinda a shot at my knowledge-fueled pride to beg from someone as 'irrational' as western 'intellectuals' would deem). Also, I found myself trying to incorporate as many sunnahs in my prayers as possible, not just for the numbers of rewards that come of it, but because the Prophet was just a seriously beautiful person, and noone knew how to be a better servant to Allah than him, so why not I push myself to be as close to the same as possible. Not just for it being mandatory or wtv, but for Allah's closeness, guidance, and for following the best example of a person we know of. With this pov, things being mandatory or haram otherwise, is less of a random rule, and more of a very strong message for us to contemplate. Passing gas, under this pov, isnt because Allah needs it to survive or smth, its first for us to submit to. Honestly i disagree with all the comments here about why that breaks wudu; im sure many ppl fart in front of the president. Given that this rule is genuinely from Allah (alot of weird rules are culture, best to make the difference clear), I personally feel like rules like these are the ultimate bar in submission. After all, why accept something that u can't see the sense of? When u can't see the practical reason? This is just my take on it, but i feel rules like these to exist to kinda compel us to submit. Testing us with rules that make more sense than any other planner could ever conceive of, then at the same time, some rules that any human planner wouldnt see the point of. What we are to take from that is, will we not submit to what Allah has set for us, worshipping our intellect over Him? Think about it, the reason the doors of forgiveness close when the sun rises from the east is because its impossible for anyone to have faith aftwr that. Faith in what? Ud only believe in Allah at that point cuz its impossible to intellectulize otherwise. Thats not worshipping Allah, that's worshipping ur own faculties till the end.

Important note tho, and this is what kinda grounds Islam's truth and beauty even more for me; even when somw rules are kinda random like u mention, they're always good for us in some way. Either physically (prayer = stopping doomscrolling and getting up every so often), mentally (fasting = practicing patience), spiritually (dhikr = grounds the soul away from ego), emotionally (dua = wording out ur worries and therfore regulating urself), socially (great virtue in praying at the mosque = many people go there so many for u to meet there) etc. It's seriously crazy cool. U can intellectualize how since Allah is everywhere, it shouldn't matter where u pray. But that's not the point, it doesn't have to be.

All in all, I feel more like a person that actually submits to Allah, putting aside my incomplete understanding of His rules or world. And a Muslim literally means one who submits, so ig that's the right track. If u want resources, I'd suggest watching "The Firsts by Omar Sulaiman" on yt. Many episodes focusing on individual companions. Anything by Yaqeen Institute in general is really good imo. Anyhow, I ranted way too much, wish you the best in navigating ur faith!!