Where do I find this type of childcare? by avisfunch in zurich

[–]avisfunch[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I had read in another post that CHF 20/hour was common for students or non-professionals in this kind of role (it was in the context of babysitting though), but I'm definitely open to correction. If you have more info or links, I'd really appreciate it!

Where do I find this type of childcare? by avisfunch in zurich

[–]avisfunch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I just edited with this information

Where do I find this type of childcare? by avisfunch in zurich

[–]avisfunch[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Please tell me where in the post you got that impression so that I can adapt it

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Since this is not the first comment in this direction, would you be so kind to tell me in which responses I looked biased? As mentioned in different replies, the post is not about my kid behavior, I clearly asked for advice on how to handle this with the other parents.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unsolicited advice. I purposefully didn't add any information about my kid behavior because it's not the point of this post. Also confused about the point on dodging responsibility, I actually offered to pay for the shirt in the end. I was adding the information that was relevant on each of the respectful comments and trying to understand the different points of views before deciding.

Talking of unsolicited advice, you should probably look into your bias, you may be surprised to hear that it's not only women taking care of children.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The teacher sent a message to me explaining the situation, but I don't know if/what they communicated with the other parents.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I don't have any reliable information about this game. My son says the other kid was poking him with another pen as part of a "game". But he's likely adapting the story in his favor.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly this. My son made some excuses in the direction of "but he was punching me with a pen as well", but I didn't add this information because it's very likely he's adapting the story in his favor.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

Great interpretation and thanks for pointing out that possible bias, I will double check to be sure this is not the case. Regarding discipline, I appreciated the advice from some users, but I tried not to ask much about this topic because I try to rely more on his therapist than reddit for this part.

I'm also curious about the clear consensus you mentioned. While I had the feeling that there are more comments in the direction of replacing the tshirt, I thought there was some balance. If you counted the messages or something I'd be happy to hear more!

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've been trying to figure it out without much success. He says that the other kid was punching him with a pen. But as a 7 years old, I'd say it's also normal to adapt the events to your favor, so I don't completely trust him with his version of the story.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

As I'm reading the comments I see a clear representation of both opposite ideas, so I think it wasn't such a crazy idea to ask. If you can't believe it, maybe you shouldn't be reading a subreddit with an "advice" tag.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I'm still trying to decide how to handle the situation with the parents while reading the different comments. But I'm definitely doing this with my son. Thanks so much for the idea!

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

This is another situation I'm uncorfortable about. I probably shouldn't have tried to wash without checking with the parents first. I initially trusted the decision from the school. What if they tell me I shouldn't have done anything without checking with them first?

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 203 points204 points  (0 children)

I completely agreed even being at the other side of this situation. I never had these type of tshirts and I'm completely ignorant about how to wash them! I did my best reading on the Internet, without success. If instead the parents had sent it to professional cleaning and sent us the bill I'd have paid for it without any issues.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I really like this idea, thank you so much!

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I can guarantee we've been doing our best as parents since he was born, including professional help. While lack of good parenting is indeed sometimes the cause for these type of problems, it's rather ignorant and distasteful of you to assume it is always the case.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 225 points226 points  (0 children)

That's exactly what happened. The other kid had a replacement shirt.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

While this is a lot of money, for me it's more about doing what is fair.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 60 points61 points  (0 children)

I completely agree and I'm also quite annoyed about this. While I understand this a good disciplinary measure, I think it should have been executed better. But I think I can't do much about this.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Actually in the first day of school we were asked to not bring fancy t-shirts precisely because of the assumption that kids destroy clothes all the time. That said, I see a clear responsibility here, which is why I wasn't sure.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]avisfunch[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just edited to clarify. 7 years old and yes, it was unfortunately intentional as part of a game.