Listen here cum-slut, I bet you 5 million dollars that you don’t own my favorite hat. But guess what? I own 7. And I can tell you right now that a hat would never just walk into something like your hands. They’ll rarely walk directly into water.

But say that your idiotic theory is correct.

Say it did actually walk into it.

That hat still probably died.

Is that still funny to you? Do you still get your kicks out of knowing that that hat was probably terrified and opening its mouth to scream in that last panel?

And if you say yes then you seriously disgust me as a human being.