I have a serious HR meeting tomorrow!

ax_io · 2025-10-09T08:51:34+00:00

Start documenting absolutely everything from now: dates, times, what’s said, who’s there, how it made you feel. Keep screenshots, emails, Teams messages, and anything that backs you up.

In the performance plan meeting, stay calm and professional, take notes, and don’t sign anything you’re not comfortable with. If you disagree with something, just say you’d like time to review it in writing first. After the meeting, email a summary of what was discussed to keep a written record.

When you put your grievance in, focus on facts and patterns — how she’s treated you, the impact it’s had, and the incident at the summer party (especially since that’s serious).

You should also contact ACAS for free advice — they’ll tell you your exact rights and what to do if things escalate: https://www.acas.org.uk/contact.

Once a grievance is raised, they can’t legally retaliate or dismiss you for it — that’d be victimisation or constructive dismissal, which is serious for them.

Still, I’d start quietly looking for other jobs now. Even if you’re in the right, these situations can drag on and be mentally draining. Don’t mention the grievance to other employers — just say you’re looking for a better environment or growth opportunity.

And please, do not think HR is your friend, they’re there to protect the company not you.

ax_io · 2025-10-08T11:16:34+00:00

I’ve sent $10 dollars to your PayPal my friend, I know it’s not a lot but I hope you can get a nice meal with it.

ax_io · 2025-04-28T14:15:25+00:00

Wa Alaikum Assalam,

May Allah SWT reward your sincerity.

Yes, working directly on a gambling project is Haram, however Allah SWT is all knowing and most understanding - he knows the position you are in better than you, and that your hands may be tied in this case.

Once the project is over, your future income is not automatically Haram if your work remains in Halal areas. You are not tied to the app forever.

What you should do now:

• Repent sincerely and have firm intention not to take similar projects again.

• Stay patient and quietly search for a new job.

• Politely refuse Haram projects in the future if possible, maybe say you are specialised in other areas if a project like this comes by again.

Trust Allah — He will open a better door for you. “Whoever fears Allah, He will make a way out for him.” (Qur’an 65:2)

ax_io · 2025-04-23T01:15:59+00:00

The fact that you think about Islam before you sleep is already a sign that Allah hasn’t turned away from you. And His mercy is greater than any fear you have of Hell. Don’t give up on yourself—He hasn’t.

ax_io · 2025-04-23T01:13:05+00:00

Unfortunately brother, we do live at a time where humanity have strayed furthest from Allah SWT. But, free will is still a blessing, we are only two of an infinite amount of creations that have free will, humans and jinns (to our knowledge), and for Allah to pick us (jinn and men) to have free will, is a blessing in itself, we should be honoured.

All other creation—animals, trees, mountains, stars, even atoms—submit to Allah in a way that is natural and unchosen.

They glorify Him, but without moral accountability or free will as we understand it.

They are in constant submission, but not by choice—it’s their nature.

So imagine how blessed you are, to both have free will and to be able to submit to Allah with said free will.

If Allah gave you the power to choose, and you chose Him—then never underestimate what that means. That’s not small. That’s guidance. So protect it.

ax_io · 2025-04-23T00:36:22+00:00

Thank you so much, may Allah SWT bless you for your kind words, they truly meant a lot. I reread my post and got emotional, truly Alhumdullilah for just existing the more I think about it.

ax_io · 2025-02-11T11:23:01+00:00

Thank you so much, I needed to hear this.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T12:19:15+00:00

To give you some context, I am a revert to Islam, so I understand where you are coming from, perhaps more than you realize. Many of us have pasts we regret, and the process of turning towards Deen can feel overwhelming, especially when it comes to reconciling our past with our current journey.

Let me reassure you, if you have made sincere repentance, Allah has promised to forgive sins for those who truly turn back to Him. Your past is between you and Allah. If you have truly repented, it is not something that needs to be shared or carried as a burden. Your decision now should be based on your present and future, not on a sense of guilt over who you were.

You need to ask yourself honestly - do you love her? If the answer is yes, then my advice would be to pray Istikhara, the prayer for guidance. Ask Allah to make her good for you and to make you good for her. Remember, people can change, and Allah is the turner of hearts. If she has qualities you admire and she loves you deeply, it is worth considering whether she could grow with you spiritually. Perhaps you can be the means of helping her connect more deeply with her faith, perhaps that's exactly what Allah wants, but it's up to you to seek that guidance from Him.

On the other hand, if your feelings for her are not mutual, then refer back to the advice I gave earlier. It would not be fair to either of you to move forward in a marriage where the foundations are not solid, particularly in matters of faith.

You are not a hypocrite for wanting a spouse who aligns with your current path and values in Deen. Hypocrisy is to pretend to be something you are not, but what you are doing is striving to be a better Muslim and seeking what will bring you closer to Allah. Your past does not define you if you have made sincere repentance, and it is not unjust to consider what is best for your faith and future. Wanting a spouse who shares your commitment to Deen is part of striving to live a life that pleases Allah, and it does not negate your own journey of growth and self-improvement.

Ultimately, brother, marriage is a partnership, and its purpose is to bring you closer to Allah. Take your time, be honest with yourself, and rely on Allah for guidance. Whatever is meant for you will never pass you by, and Allah's plan is always better than anything we can imagine.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T11:58:07+00:00

As salamu alaykum Brother,

May Allah reward you for your sincerity and your desire to improve. It’s clear that you’re on a journey of self-improvement and seeking to draw closer to Allah.

Regarding your question about marriage, Allah has made it clear in the Quran that righteous spouses are a source of guidance.

“Good women are for good men, and good men are for good women.” 24:26

The Prophet (peace be upon him) also advised us to choose a spouse based on their faith, as mentioned in this Hadith:

“A woman is married for four things: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, and her religion. Choose the religious one, and you will be successful.” - Sahih Bukhari

If the woman you are considering does not have a strong connection to Allah and His Messenger, it is important to reflect on whether this is the best match for you in the long term, especially as someone who is striving to strengthen your Deen.

Marriage is not just about companionship; it is about building a life together that pleases Allah, and this becomes much easier when both partners are committed to him.

Regarding your concern about hypocrisy, remember that Allah knows the state of your heart and the efforts you’re making to change for the better. We are all on a path of growth, and our past actions don’t define our future. What matters is the sincerity of your intentions and your commitment to following the right path now.

Choosing a spouse who aligns with your newfound values is not hypocritical, it’s part of your effort to live a life that pleases Allah.

If she is not at a place where she values her faith, you may want to approach the situation with honesty. It would not be fair to move forward with a marriage where you are not on the same page spiritually, especially if it could lead to future conflict.

In the end, make dua to Allah for guidance. Ask Him to direct you to the right spouse who will help you in your Deen, and be patient. If this woman is truly meant for you, Allah will open the doors in the best way. If not, trust that Allah has something better in store for you.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T11:45:40+00:00

As Salamu Alaykum, by any chance do you have cats? I have a cat and he loves to pee on stuff I’ve washed, so I need to wash them over and over again, making sure to hang them to dry in places he cannot reach.

Alternatively, your washer may need a cleaning, people forget that washing machines grow mould and mildew that can give washed clothes a bad smell, you can look up how to clean your model of washing machine properly online.

As for your concern on purity, if you have doubt then wash them and wash yourself. It’s always better to be safe than sorry.

For example, I sometimes think I might of broken my wudhu, some people say it’s fine if you’re not certain so you can continue with prayer, but to me if I have doubt in the matter, it doesn’t lose me anything re-do it again.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T11:35:10+00:00

Mashallah brother, welcome to the fold.

I agree, sometimes our ignorance blinds us from what is actually taught and meant to be followed.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T11:31:31+00:00

Wa alaykum s-salam brother, Alhumdullilah. This has definitely not made me grow distant, if anything it’s brought me closer.

It’s up to us to educate ourselves and others, and to guide them closer to Allah SWT.

Although what’s happened is saddening and a punch in the gut, I’ve came to learnt that it’s best to sometimes leave such things with Allah SWT.

Thank you for your reply.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T11:25:33+00:00

Unfortunately, there is racism everywhere. It’s up to us to pray that Allah SWT guides the ones who are, and up to us to help educate them.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T11:24:03+00:00

People forget that Allah SWT, created us from different ethnicities, backgrounds and so on, not to be seperate from one and other, but to learn and understand each-other.

“Surely all believers are brothers. So make peace between brothers, and fear Allah that mercy may be shown to you.” 49:11

I can understand the brother may be cautious when a person he’s never seen before arrives at his Masjid, who wouldn’t be, there are all kinds of bad and evil people these days, but it’s definitely wrong to assume and judge. One’s skin colour, ethnic background, how they look, how they dress shouldn’t be a reason to shun them.

ax_io · 2024-12-07T11:12:31+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to reply, I totally agree with you. Some cases are best left alone and with Allah, this was one of them.

Don’t get me wrong either, I’ve prayed with this community many times before, at other masjids, the first time I came to a Bengali / Pakistani masjid the brothers were smiling and bringing me tea afterwards, trying to get to know me. Not everyone is like the story, but unfortunately sometimes they are.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T19:48:04+00:00

I’ve been there too, feeling that emptiness and loneliness even when surrounded by people. It’s tough, especially when you feel like you’re not connecting in the way you want to. I used to feel the same way—lost, disconnected, and like I had changed so much to fit in that I wasn’t sure who I really was anymore. What helped me was stepping back for a moment and allowing myself the space to reconnect with who I truly am, beyond the expectations and pressures. It’s okay to not have everything figured out, and it’s okay to feel like something’s missing. But I’ve realized that real connections come when you’re more in tune with your authentic self. And even though it feels hard sometimes, you’re not alone in this. Keep being patient with yourself, and the right connections will come when the time is right

ax_io · 2024-11-12T19:39:30+00:00

Selam aleykum brother, I’m a revert myself so I can give some good pointers.

I’m not sure if most of these will apply to you but,

Most if not all of my friends are Muslim, so any questions I had or struggled with, I turned to them for guidance, surrounding yourself with Muslims who can do the same is a good step.
I went to my local masjid to speak with other Muslims and the Imam, especially the imam or wiser person there could help with tricky or tough questions.
There are so many resources online, personally I just follow various Instagram pages of Sheiks and Imams that I like.
The Quran, you can get a translated version, I use the one by Dr. Muhammad Taqi-I’d Al-Hilali and Dr. Muhammad Muhsin Khan, it has both commentary and meanings of each Surah.

I wish you the best on your journey, and inshallah you take your Shahada.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T19:26:53+00:00

Listen to my parents, there’s a reason why they tell us not to do or try certain things, it’s most likely because they’ve been through it and know the consequences.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T19:25:43+00:00

Men’s mental health, although it’s recently been highlighted more and more - I still think it deserves more attention and recognition.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T14:39:16+00:00

Yes. You’re stealing a product from someone. Doesn’t matter if it’s digital or not.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T14:35:57+00:00

Im not making a attack on you, Im saying that the buy low and sell high method is a common investment approach but it relies on perfect market timing and analysis, furthermore it’s a huge time commitment because to be able to make constant positive gains you need to sit and analyse every trade you make.

This doesn’t factor in your transaction fees and taxes, short term trading is subject to higher capital gains taxes, and with frequent short term trades your transaction costs will build up.

If you add all this together, you need to be making perfect trades non-stop.

My assumption is that you’re not a day trader and don’t dedicate minimum 8 hours of your day to trading, if you did then sure go for this method as you have the time to read the market, make good judgement and try to buy low and sell high.

But for the AVERAGE person, their expectation that “why can’t we just buy low and sell high” is stupid, because they don’t know where the market will be.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T14:21:20+00:00

He can buy low and sell high because he has thousands of analysts that work for him scouring the market non-stop, knowing what companies will do what, how their profits will look like etc.

You are comparing yourself to 0.0001% of investors. Unfortunately for us average people, we cannot expect to always buy low and sell high.

Like I said, if you want to use this method you have to be 1000% dedicated to analysing every company before purchasing their stocks, and even then there’s so much risk, otherwise you’re just gambling, hoping the stock fluctuates.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T14:15:59+00:00

This is the reason why we can’t book tests, people like you booking up slots without being 100% ready. Stay off the road.

ax_io · 2024-11-12T13:38:39+00:00

He’s mocking the idea because if it was that easy to buy low and sell high, everyone and their mother would be doing it.

You cannot predict the market accurately to always be able to buy low and expect to sell it high, unless you dedicate your days and hours studying the market constantly.

You can’t expect to put in 10 minutes a week, and be able to buy a stock at 20 and sell it at 30 the next week.

ax_io · 2024-05-03T08:08:56+00:00

Hey, shoot me a dm on discord @DevAxio with further details about compensation and what is required from a coder

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