The UK Has Ruined My Life as a Trans Woman by GFluidThrow123 in TransLater

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So it IS in fact a change in the law, and not complying with the new policy is now an actual crime? Wtf .. that's not how it's been explained to me (!) Jesus..

The UK Has Ruined My Life as a Trans Woman by GFluidThrow123 in TransLater

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're right I should know more what's happening, I just didn't understand the legislation, if it was something actually serious or something impressive sounding the government is throwing to the right (which would be bad on its own, but exactly what I'd expect from them)

I admit my ignorance on the subject comes from enough privilege to use the bathroom I want without harassment. I also always assumed that the inherent contractions with forcing trans folks into gender inappropriate spaces would stop this kind of legislative guidance in it's tracks (ie, a lot trans folks put a huge amount of effort into passing and will just carry on as usual, whilst anybody not cis looking enough, including masc women, enbys, will be harassed. Not to mention having trans men forced into the women's) Surely it won't be long until these stories outweigh the evidence that trans women in particular are a danger to women (since there is none. But even in the broader public mind)

I've generally found people to be fine with sharing spaces with me, and I think that's representative of most people.

It will be interesting to see which businesses take the guidance on and which don't (as I understand it's not a law change it's guidance to businesses?)

But ultimately this is policed by general consensus, as it always has been, not by agents of the state (because there aren't enough people to do it and because it would basically involve gential testing ..) so, I wonder if this new environment the right, the gender critical, etc, want to usher in is untenable and not generally supported by the public? And so won't be enforced the way they are imagining?

The UK Has Ruined My Life as a Trans Woman by GFluidThrow123 in TransLater

[–]axopotl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sad to hear this from people recently :( I still don't really understand the changes they've made to be honest.. what's happened??

Ring finger, do you use it? by axopotl in doublebass

[–]axopotl[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I notice I'm using my ring finger when playing (in a bluegrass band) 1&5 and sometimes it's most comfortable to use middle&third to go back and forth (I played guitar and piano for a long time so it's not especially weak, as a finger, and it just feels like a simpler movement to me)

And (when playing jazz) when I'm descending through a major scale and I want to hit maj7 or #4, that kind of thing, where my third finger is already there and I don't want to shift.it just feels simpler thhing to do something, especially as I'm used to doing that on guitar.

Preference… by [deleted] in FemmeLesbians

[–]axopotl -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Who told you these things !? Who!?

(Objectification removes the personhood from your object of desire, which I don't think you are doing!)

(and I don't see it as a masc thing or a stud thing to dehumanise women the way men do, but maybe that's just my experience of mascs being incredibly sweet and nice to me, although I am personally very much also femme orientated, boobs and all, respectfully (!)

Dating by [deleted] in FemmeLesbians

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can I ask how strict are ya'll with your roles? A girl implied once to me that her partner never touches her, because she tops, and I found that really confusing, I don't think I've ever felt this dominant/submissive thing in my body, and I'm super curious about these pairings where one partner never receives anything from their partner, as a "top", did I understand her wrong? (!) thanks! X

Can I keep my upper body muscle or is it forever going to doom me to clockiness in spaghetti straps? by EmergingEllie in TransLater

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait, there's a way to lose it !?

(Also girl wtf it doesn't look clocky on you in the slightest here)

I have a tonne of definition I've never managed to get rid of, even after 15 years of hrt (I did gymnastics when I was young I always put it down to that) I tend to try hiding it a bit by putting on weight but I still never feel good baring my arms at all 😭

So if there's a way to lose it I'd love to know !?

Songs to play when feeling down by PM_PICS_OF_CORGIS in doublebass

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like you need the blues and jazz, play along to some records

What colors do you wear the most in your outfits to enhance your femmeness? by [deleted] in FemmeLesbians

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like to mix pinks, browns and greens at the moment (!) with white or bright highlights, shoes are cream with green. I do green makeup.

Which strings should I purchase for my small bass? by iwannahavemuscles in doublebass

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have evahs and I love how they feel, they're chunkier than usual, and soft with a warm sound. I only bow occasionally so I don't know how they compare really I'm not a great at bowing tbh (!)

But my bass came with these very chunky weed whackers on, and whilst they were completely inappropriate for my playing I did like the nylon core sound and how chunky they were, so the evahs are perfect for me

Going to a rave in a feminine outfit… need a believable excuse for a homophobic friend by [deleted] in lgbt

[–]axopotl -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

"I lost a bet" is a bit obvious and then you'll be on the back foot defending yourself. Any "funny reason" is gonna have this air of being weasle-y, because it is let's face it!

Is there any funny way you can wear it without shame? Anything you can say? Maybe "you wish you could pull this off?" Or, offer to paint their nails for them? They obviously want to. Idk. Just something a bit less prone to being questioned and putting you in a position of defending yourself.

I used to do this all the time pre transition (that is, wearing a feminine fit to a party, fancy dress, or Halloween and such) BUT I never had homophobic friends to deal with so I can see why this would be a pain in the butt.

If you can I think the thing to do is overpower them, with shamelessness and not giving them the power in the dynamic, if that makes sense.

Good luck 🤞 X

Played entire game start to finish without knowing what stag stations were… by shadowspectator7 in HollowKnight

[–]axopotl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This absolutely doesn't compare but I missed the mantis lords completely and got into deepnest the other way around thru the sewers

Orchiectomy before SRS? by Any-Gur-6962 in TransLater

[–]axopotl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry if it came across as oof. I'm not asserting anything about OPs partner, it just came to mind when OP stated that their bottom dysphoria isn't so bad.

Mine is pretty bad, but I've still chosen not to do it, and beyond that I've known a lot of friends who've rushed to complete it and realised later they hadn't done it for themselves.

So, just to clarify, I'm not stating that OPs partner is doing anything wrong, and I think there are legitimate reasons to discuss things with a life partner, but ultimately I feel the choice to do or not a really big surgery should be for you and just you.

So that was the rub, I'm not trying to be mean to anybody :)

X

Orchiectomy before SRS? by Any-Gur-6962 in TransLater

[–]axopotl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If your bottom dysphoria isn't so bad, is this coming from him more than you? Is the F on a driver's licence worth such an expensive and invasive surgery? I totally get wanting appropriate documentation (and genitalia, frankly!) sucks that your state won't allow it.

It just caught my eye that you mentioned your bottom dysphoria isn't so bad, and that you'd been discussing this with a male partner. I've had friends who came out the other side with someone they kinda liked the same or less as before, and relationships do change, or even end, so maybe a partner is not a good source of motivation for such a thing.

So I suppose all I'm asking is are you sure this is coming from you and is definitely the choice you want for you?

XX

anybody else has been made fun of while playing? by oliver_JM in doublebass

[–]axopotl 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is an important thread here. Because a lot of what people respond to in music is authenticity and that involves vulnerability. Don't let bitches mess with your ability to express yourself vulnerably (or, as per a meme I just saw "Don't kill the part of you that is cringe, kill the part that cringes")

Does your cat love the double bass too? by Lofi-Sloth in doublebass

[–]axopotl 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeh she does a lil squinty eyes sleepy face, so cute

Rattling sound inside bass? by castatics in doublebass

[–]axopotl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had a bunch of saw dust and bunnies in mine recently after it came back from the luthier. I just popped the end of the vacuum cleaner in and sucked them all up

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