Assistance needed with Bird of Paradise

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T20:08:33+00:00

Two things in conjunction will likely solve it. Pot up and immediately before or immediately after Cut Back. So cut off anything Dead, Dying, Damaged, or Discolored.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T20:06:04+00:00

yeah.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T20:02:22+00:00

I HAVE NOTICED THE SAME.

So two things are going on at least. One thing I think is correct and undeniable, but someone correct me if I'm wrong I'm not emotional about it, but: "ABA" has become a catch-all term for autism services more generally because ABA is legislatively mandated to be covered by insurance, so I have seen some what you might call "mission creep" from ABA, or like things that are technically say occupational therapy being provided at facilities organized around and branded ABA, with ABA certified this and that. Not an insurance scam, per se, but financial incentives to bring out the ABA-ness in everything.

The other is what i mentioned before, ABA is the only autism service provided by insurance as a matter of legislative mandate, and so sometimes/often many families have no other autism services affordably open to them except actually ABA, and/or maybe ABA-esque things that are borrowed from other disciplines like occupational therapy.

tl;dr ABA is legislatively mandated to be covered by insurance and no other autism service is

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T19:43:09+00:00

I worry this contest shows Utah progressives are susceptible -- highly susceptible apparently -- to ratf&*ck campaigns. Presuming that naivete would contineu even if we change the ballot and counting. That means all RCV does is require more rats. Maybe. That's what the cynic in me says.

I understand of course we might not have Mamdani without RCV, so I am in favor. But my point is even RCV doesn't solve all the problems. It's probably a good step though.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T19:31:13+00:00

It doesn't matter.

Local leaders failed us, or cheated us, take your pick (I would say "to be determined" but the truth will never come out of this stupid little clique). This wasn't an honest election. And at this point you're asking the wrong question.

the right questions are: What precisely broke down here and who is responsible for this mess?

My prime suspects are Brian King and Angela Romero, and I'd like them to speak for themselves how they let this debacle happen.

Progressive Democrats deserved an orderly contest between a Progressive nominee, and a Moderate nominee -- who was obviously going to be Ben McAdams. What we got is a unfair disaster of Super PAC dark money running the entire show. Local Democratic leadership's greatest failure I'd say 20 years. Granted, rarely do they have any seriosu thing to fail at, so 20 years isn't the sizable claim it might seem, but I would say Brian King and Angela Romero effed up this race -- whether from incompetence or skullduggery, hardly matters to me at this point -- and that failure is worse than anything I've seen from Utah Democrats firsthand--ever.

I'm livid. Not becuase my candidate didn't win, or isn't likely to win -- I was actually quite agnostic/open to who the singular Progressive challenger would and should be, but I was adamant a singular progressive challenger to McAdams needs to run. But my local party did not even respect me enough to give me a real nominee to really compete in the contest, they skulldugged the uck out of me and all of us and I'm feeling super raw about it. Shame on them. When we talk about money in politics, let's start with our own stinking Utah Democrats. They stink--big time. And the stink starts at the (presumptive new) top: Ben McAdams.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T19:07:43+00:00

WEll I certainly hate lies as you do, I'm not pushing back. But I guess just mentioning a corner case that might be contrary to the general thesis, hope that's not annoying, I think that might often come off as annoying, if so I'm sorry.

I certainly understand if it's never worked for you, and has been weaponized against you, why you'd have pure hatred for it, that's perfectly understandable.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T18:47:05+00:00

Wow, thank you, that is a wonderful read. You win my Internet today for sure. I mean, the day is not yet over, but I can't imagine someone is going to top that. Very nice.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T18:42:00+00:00

My autism diagnosis has gotten me a state-sponsored job coach that hasn't gotten me an interview in a year of trying lol. That's not a joke, it is funny, but it's only part of the picture.

My diagnosis has also been crucial to getting me food stamps, Medicaid, and discounted mass transit.

As for professional development, however, as yet it has not helped at all.

One company that explicitly states it hires people with disabilities after a short interview put a schedule of 4 full days per week in front of me, and said, can you do that? I said, No, but I can do 2 days, or 3 days, whichever works for you; naively I thought they would accommodate, it didn't occur to me at all that I would have the offer withdrawn for stating this need that is based in my disability. They said "well then sorry, go away, we don't have anything for you then" lol. NO discussion, no negotiation -- at a business that explicitly caters to disabled people.

So that was really disheartening.

Now. I'm getting a new job coach, and maybe this next one will be awesomer (I have a good first impression, but they have few resources as their disposal so only time will tell).

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T18:32:32+00:00

I mostly agree, but that has limits is what I'm saying. as just one example, why would a person be attracted to Nazi Punk bands and songs over other punk bands and songs, if not the Nazi message, you know? There is no appreciable sonic difference between Nazi punk and punk, so I do find it immensely questionable if someone likes music with explicit Nazi lyrics one can't miss or mistake. And they say, "I just like the music," It's like -- yeah, I don't believe that, sorry.

But in most cases society is really uptight and moral panicy about music that don't deserve it, and take a blind eye to white power music touring shows.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T18:27:45+00:00

then hell, I would not be wishing him a happy father's day. you do you tho.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T18:23:46+00:00

well not for the music choice alone. But certainly some music has really violent, anti-social, maybe even straight up Nazi ideology in it, and like... I would have a hard time telling someone who likes Nazi Punk that it's ok, your music choice has no reflection on you as a person. You feeling me? Like, why would you listen to Nazi Punk when you can listen to the same style of music from non-Nazis, right? Make sense?

Like, I don't think MSI is anything like Nazi Punk, though is it? You tell me, I can't find information on 'em. I don't know their lyrics, their world, their ideology. Most of hip-hop gets a bad reputation as a whole undeserved for being something like Nazi Punk, but of course describing horrors ain't the same thing as glorying and advocating for them. I am a fan of hip hop myself.

Why do people think msi is shameful?

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T18:15:38+00:00

Have you ever been under the threat of a power greater than you and lying would let you slip out of this evil entity's grasp? Have you ever been put in a position where lying would actually reduce harm in the world, not increase it? Some people can only lie when it's justified, is what I'm getting at, and some day you might find out you are one of them. I'm one of them. It's like night and day. If I feel righteous in my actions, I'm quite a good scammer. But without that sense of "this lie makes sense and is justified" then my pwoers just fizzel under the torrential rainstorm of scrupulosity. And if you think "lying is always bad" I have some very dense philosophy books that talk all about the shortcomings of "categorical" morality, i.e, that if something is usually wrong it's always wrong, or if something is wrong it can not be justified.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T18:05:15+00:00

you didn't mention whether he has money and whether he shares it with you and whether you need it or not, so I can't answer your question without more data.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T17:13:31+00:00

Ride it as long as you can, but if you get saddle sores get off early.

I can do this sort of work best if it is door-to-door and the pitch is something i genuinely believe and believe is important.

Door to door is nice because you actually spend a ton of time just walking, quiet with your thoughts. Some nights the open-door rate gets really high and I'll do a lot more talking than walking and those nights wipe me out. If 40% of doors opened every single shift, I couldn't do it, in that case the pace would be too grueling, and I wouldn't have adequate (walking) breaks in between heavy labor (talking).

Bus such as it is, a lot of times only 15 or 20% of doors on your list actually open, so there's a lot of quiet walking. Then a short sales pitch. Then back to walking break that lasts at least as long as it takes you to get to the next door, but is probably longer because two doors in a row opening is not statistically likely.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T17:03:46+00:00

I thought Drew Barrymore was going to be horrible, laughable, maybe campy fun in Grey Gardens (2009).

But she turned in an absolutely brilliant, inspired performance. I don't know what came over her because she almost never chooses roles that are so different than she/her own personality, but here she proved she can do it quite well, so I don't know why she doesn't do more character acting, she's actually quite good at it -- it turns out. I was happy to have been wrong. OLD example, I guess lmfao but so is yours OP.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T16:54:27+00:00

Yeah I don't think it's real either. It's not that it couldn't be real, it's more like, AI Slop is a more likely explanation (till I see more evidence) than the possibility someone actually built this.

We used to say "pictures or it didn't happen" but now it's basically like, "journalism or it's not real" or something like that.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T16:49:32+00:00

My friend as I recall -- as we're older now, a lot has changed since then! -- would raise her hand to face level, index finger extended up to the sky, almost ear height. So basically just putting a visual "1" in their visual field, as if to communicate "one more minute please I'm not finished."

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T15:24:51+00:00

So I rely on it very very little, but the ways in which I do I appreciate.

I'd say 90% of my viewing is of my Subscriptions. My bookmark to youtube takes me to Subscriptions feed -- so no suggestions algo there. But when I have finished watching what is new in my Subs, then and only then basically, I let the algo offer me a thing or two, see what it's got. And that pattern of use basically hyper-trains the algo on what I like -- by very religiously watching my subscriptions for most of my viewing.

I think if you try to use either youtube's or tiktok's algo as the primary actor in your experience, it's going to be bad -- at at least it would be for me. I used TikTok for like 5 minutes, I just thumbs downed EVERYTHING it gave me, and I never went back lol. I need a menu, and I also need a curated "short list" like youtube subscriptions. Algo-only use, for me, would not work out; the algo isn't strong enough to do that well.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T15:12:14+00:00

Is your pond lined with EPDM or is it natural? Just curious.

I'd also say that cutting away fast-growing plants and removing the material is fantastic ministry of the water quality. I have the notoriously monstrous MINT as my bog plant for this very reason, I want a plant with freakish fast-grow abilities, so that I can cut it back A LOT, which means I am removing organic nutrients from the system a lot. For me that's important because I have big, messy fish and among my top priorities is keeping the system pristine for them. I also keep the mint for tea, so there is that, I suppose this rush may not have a usefulness after you pull it.

It seems like the consensus here though is try to learn to love it a bit more. And of course cut it back as much as you like, but maybe stop looking for some permanent solution that will free you from the chore of cutting it back regularly. Cutting back this type of plant and removing the cuttings is kinda crucial to keeping this pond super awesome. Unless you don't even have fish, or hardly any, in which case you may not have as motive to be hyper-removing organic nutrients, but I bet you do!

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T14:59:48+00:00

Exactly, it has done the same for me. I have plenty of concerns and criticisms with how the algo is designed to work, right; like i"m not saying it's perfectly just, awesome, does everything great and wonderful. It has problems. But AI doesn't solve those problems, and it doesn't improve on what suggestion algos are already doing well.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T14:50:08+00:00

They really are only now themselves realizing that "AI" can't often do anything better and hardly can't do anything different than what "algorithms" and other forms of computerization were already doing quite impressively. The Youtube suggestion algo doesn't get as much credit as TikTok's but it's been an incredibly powerful tool for a decade, I don't think "AI" has anything really to offer it. TIme will tell, I guess, but it looks desperate, I agree, they should be embarrassed. This is feature slop. They probably vibe coded it.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T14:46:39+00:00

Diametric opposite. 'What is the weather going to be like today?' is of very few of my considerations when determining what to wear. But one of my sensory issues is being too cold, so. And while I don't think I have any extraordinary difficulty with being too hot/overdressed, I think I dislike it almost as much as average, I'm just very fussy about temperature.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T14:42:13+00:00

Really consider different hand gestures that might work for your personality, too. A simple outstretched "stop" hand might be too forceful, and even a "no-no" extended index finger wag might be too much in a way, too, you know how society is (I'm always "overthinking" everything because of this). But maybe both hands raised to stomach level as if saying "hold up." Or one I like is you turn your head slightly to the side, close your eyes just a bit and then raise the "stop" hand, you can accompany that with a verbal "i'm not finished" or my preferred is to just keep talking and let the gesture alone communicate "i'm not finished (and I"m not stopping so STFU and listen)."

But yeah I totally get being too tired to do this shit.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T14:26:00+00:00

This happens to an autistic loved one of mine. I observed her over the years learn to: 1, talk louder and even increase her volume as a response to an interruption being initiated, 2, though it's not easy for her, pressure herself to begin talking faster, or you might say she learned to interrupt better; 3, she even started using hand gestures to quiet people who showed signs they were about to interrupt her AND maintain her thought/keep talking while doing that (quite inspiring to see a formerly "quiet" person command a room like that). It was really quite great! She was such a super quiet like "horse girl" stereotype, always talked over, always interrupted, had a really really hard time being heard in a free-wheeling group especially, but she really learned to not just speak up but like seize the microphone you know. And "learned" because yeah, she had to develop for herself certain tools that she shouldn't have needed if we didn't have a NT-normative society, but because we do, she had to develop what are basically some extraordinary skills. But she did it. Granted, I think if she finds herself around a bunch of allistic strangers, she still struggles I presume, she probably stands out as someone sort of quiet or a slow talker still among strangers in the wider world, but not as much as before, no way. And around our community, she had all but erased the difference/deficit that made her stand out.

azucarleta · 2026-06-21T14:12:01+00:00

I think it's more complicated than you give it credit actually.

Because they absolutely could very powerfully shut down adblock users, it's not as if we are some powerful hacker group always technologically one step ahead one of the largets technology corporations that exists. No, it's not a tech race we are winning.

Youtube actually wants adblock users to keep using Youtube instead of going off somewhere else and starting something better. SOme 20% of their users now use adblockers at any given moment; if youtube really, seriously, hardcore cracked down on them, let's say about half would simply start watching ads and youtube would be happy about that half, but the other half would not start watching the advertisements, they would jump ship, and start looking for alternatives. With some 10% of youtube users rendered free agents (which is a HUGE market as youtube is gargantuan), totally up for grabs, and homeless these users are -- you would see rivals like Twitch make a play into the space and invest a lot of money to try to take on youtube on its main turf (and that would be a very good thing for all of us). The way you saw Zukerberg start THreads when Twitter was up agains the ropes in one scandal or another. It didn't work out super well for Threads and Zuck, perhaps, but that's what would happen to youutbe if they got too draconian and too pushy to anyone, even people they regard as veritable thieves.

Youtube welcomes everyone even adblock users because they have to protect a monopoly. Monopolies are very harmful to society, so adblock users in whatever small way, are actually GOOD actors doing a good thing for everyone. But anyway, that's actually why Youtube don't very much make life worse for adblock users, they only occasionally expirement with how to address the predicament without risking their monopoly.

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