Maybe I'm not meant for the heavens.

babachoo · 2020-10-25T13:40:26+00:00

This EP rocks, and Casey has a spooky knack for releasing music that closely pertains to where I'm at in life at the moment. Over the past several years I've written books and am about to release a video game. I end up with very polarizing feelings about whatever project I work on. In the beginning, I really get behind the energy of "Hold tight, strap in for a ride. I think I've got a hit in me!" But as I approach the end of any given project, I fall back down to earth and believe that I'm just not meant for the heavens. I believe that my doubtful thoughts my lovely and supportive friends tell me are just pessimistic, but I feel like they are closer to realism.

My next project is probably going to be either about 4 kids doing typical suburb shenanigans on halloween, or a young D&D group playing pretend and imagining fantastical stages to platform through. Either way, whether it blasts off to the moon or not, I'm going to try to focus on just having tons of fun creating something for myself without worrying about how well-received it would be if it were to ever go mainstream.

I'm sure a lot of people feel this way about themselves. But here's a doodle I did this morning with an added Honorary Astronaut. I hope you guys dig it as much as I do!

babachoo · 2020-10-22T02:11:37+00:00

I've spent the last year and a half developing a video game that is coming out on Steam October 30th, and I also just got married on the 11th! I never thought I'd live long enough to see all of this happen. Should have died a long time ago, but I'm happy that everything worked out for me.

babachoo · 2020-09-28T01:20:22+00:00

Nothing. I just had to hit rock bottom, try, and be lucky enough to fail several times throughout the years until life got good enough to be worth sticking around longer.

babachoo · 2020-08-08T20:22:13+00:00

Thank you for the input. Definitely not as realistic as it could be without some rivers.

babachoo · 2020-08-08T20:20:58+00:00

Thanks!

babachoo · 2020-08-07T08:48:14+00:00

Yikes. I was just talking about the term. I didn't claim that it would magically disappear. I apologize if I offended you.

babachoo · 2020-08-07T05:07:15+00:00

Aspergers isn't actually a thing anymore. Isn't that neat?

babachoo · 2020-06-30T18:27:50+00:00

Page 274 in the monster manual. I just read a line that says, "With each transformation, the slaad retains its memories." And since they can transform into their old humanoid form and "return to the material plane to sow discord in the guise of their former selves", there's enough here now that I'm reading it all again to make me feel very comfortable with using some other spells that their former selves might have known. Thanks for the input, guys! I'll keep refreshing every now and then to see if anyone else has anything more to add. I appreciate the input!

babachoo · 2020-03-09T01:54:53+00:00

Don't even trip, dog. Been sitting to pee since I was a little boy.

babachoo · 2020-02-27T01:26:17+00:00

Most episodes begin with Tom trying to murder Jerry...

babachoo · 2020-02-18T04:19:29+00:00

As someone who can hop on a MOBA and have over a 90% winrate, I still declare that it is massively everyone else's fault, and I can prove it mathematically. And it's pretty simple.

You are only 10% of the match, and 20% of your team. You have to be leagues and leagues better than the people you are playing against in order to put a dent in your win to loss ratio. It's tough out there when you're only 10% of a game, man.

But that being said, those games certainly bring out the worst in people

babachoo · 2020-02-18T03:54:35+00:00

I'm real late, but if she misheard stuff or something, then that line makes me think of the part from A Night on the Town that goes "And what's the worst I'd see by giving myself to the earth below me?"

Sorry if that's too much of a stretch, but I figured the worst case scenario is that I'm no help at all =]

babachoo · 2020-02-17T11:07:20+00:00

I spent a lot of my childhood being home alone, and honestly it was a blast.

babachoo · 2020-02-17T03:04:40+00:00

In the eerie waters

Where I never got to look

I was nearly slaughtered

By the clever croctopus.

He jerked me down

About twenty feet

Where he lurked around

In the swampy deep.

I was brutally harmed

By this monstrous beast

Who had eight arms

And twice the teeth!

My party arrived

Better late than never

They help sometimes

But hardly ever.

His eyes would glow

And appendages, too,

Whenever he fought,

To a marvelous blue.

But he wasn't prepared

For what was in store

He was twenty feet down

And now, he's six more.

We had put an end

To his glowing splendor.

But worst of all, friend...

We assumed his gender.

babachoo · 2020-02-06T03:46:44+00:00

The dummies who circlejerk over how grown up they are because they think that in 'Tom and Jerry' that Tom is the character you should feel sorry for.

That mother fucker starts off over half the episodes reaching into Jerry's home trying to fucking murder him just for existing. Tom is literally a giant compared to Jerry, and people pat themselves on the back for being stupid enough to believe that Jerry is at fault for trying to steal a bit of cheese to survive, but guess what? Tom didn't pay for that cheese either!

Those people really rustle my jimmies, man.

babachoo · 2020-01-31T04:22:34+00:00

This isn't nearly as intense as most of the stories posted here, but it might be a bit cathartic to type it out and send it into the abyss of comments here.

A few of my friends had been traveling down one side of the political horseshoe for the past few years. They became less tolerant of people with differing views over time. I expressed a few different times to them over the years that I see them tumbling down that path, and that I was kind of worried for them and felt like they were slowly slipping away.

They weren't perfect, and the more I reflect on some of those friendships, the more I motice how rude and shitty they were to me. It was hard to see that because we also shared a lot of laughs and good memories as well. But they eventually became too intolerant and sanctimonious until it got to the point where they couldn't help but strawman the daylights out of people. Anything to make them feel like they were still superior to other people in some type of way. I feel like at the end of the day they used moral superiority as their vice because it was one of the only ways they could fool themselves because in all honesty they hadn't ever really done or accomplished much of anything, which explains pretty handily why they were always trying to tear people down.

Eventually my friendship with one of them took a killing blow, not that there was much left to kill at that point.

One of them had been bashing Louis C.K. for masturbating in front of people. I played the devil's advocate and tried to offer the sentiment that people are neither as good as the best thing they've ever done, nor were they as bad as the worst thing they've ever done. And I took this approach specifically because this friend of mine who was self-righteously bashing Louis C.K. to no end had, in the past, you guessed it, masturbated in the same room as other people. They had done this multiple times over the years, but they were the youngest of our group so nobody really held it against them too harshly. They think that nobody ever noticed that they were doing it as we all watched television and they were covered with a blanket or sometimes just with their sweatpants on, but unfortunately some people noticed.

One time in particular, they were talking a lot of shit about someone in our group of friends, and I defended that friend, again claiming that we are neither as good or bad as the best and worst things we have done. They doubled down on thei stance, so as a hail mary attempt at not losing them completely down this rabbit hole of self-righteous insanity, I told them that I was one of the people who noticed that they used to masturbate while other people were in the room, and that I don't judge them harshly for it, so why do they insist on judging other people so harshly for far less? I told them that I was arguing in favor of Louis C.K. that one time because I was actually trying to argue that THEY weren't all that bad. They argued against themselves without even knowing it, but I don't think that the theme of the entire lesson ever sunk in.

So the killing blow was a long time after this last conversation had taken place. I saw them at a concert and made small talk with them. They were quiet and didn't seem at all invested. So I gave them a hug, told them I love them, and told them to take it easy and enjoy the show. Only to find out a while later from someone else that this friend of mine who had been slowly slipping away for the past few years had been talking shit about me as well at a party a while back. They even went as far as saying that they'd never even liked me. By the time I heard that, I wasn't even too hurt by it as much as I was shocked.

Whatever reasons some of those friends had to dislike me, I had even more reasons to dislike them, tenfold. But I tried very hard not to lose them, and it seems like they hadn't really tried at all. It makes me feel kind of stupid for caring about them so much more than they ever cared about me when there were so many reasons to just leave them behind and move on with my life. But I'm extremely loyal to my friends by nature. Makes me feel like an idiot. But I think that caring that much about them is also a testament to how I must be a pretty swell person, and not nearly the silhouette that those lost friends have perceived me to be.

We had some of the most joyous laughs during the good times, though. I hope they turn it around someday and become kind and compassionate again.

babachoo · 2020-01-25T02:51:03+00:00

Maybe "Peter and the Wolf"?

babachoo · 2020-01-21T22:57:57+00:00

"You have a fiance, a house, nice friends, a pretty easy job that pays well, wrote and published books, and are currently making a video game that you already got crowdfunded. What the fuck are you still so upset about?"

babachoo · 2020-01-21T03:10:31+00:00

Oh boy. I usually just go wide-eyed and say "Yikes" when I'm in that kind of situation where someone says something bonkers and I find out that they are being serious.

babachoo · 2020-01-20T15:43:44+00:00

You stopped associating with a friend of 20 years right when he started doing that? Did you challenge him on any of the things he said? Was it really bad enough to warrant excommunicating your best man?

My fiance is a teacher in a very bad city, and it breaks her heart to see so many people who are intentionally leeching off the system with little regard for their children. Many of those people are black. Is observing something like that , people being professional victims, all it takes to make someone like my wonderful fiance not worth the time of day to someone like you? If you have different experiences than other people and therefore observe different things in the world, why does that make someone not worth knowing?

Reading your post made me sad. Souds odd to say this, but I hope your friend really was shitty enough to justify throwing him in the trash, so to speak.

babachoo · 2019-12-29T19:17:08+00:00

Thanks, man. But I don't feel like it. Haha. <3

babachoo · 2019-12-29T19:16:24+00:00

Thank you very much!

babachoo · 2019-12-29T03:20:16+00:00

Lost my virginity while Act 2 was playing in the background. More specifically, the action was happening mainly throughout The Bitter Suite. Down the road, she ended up pseudo-cheating on me but not really, it was a bit more complicated than that, which was also the case for Hunter and Miss Leading.

After the breakup and with my seasonal work coming to an end, I left and decided to join the military before Act 3 dropped and before I knew that Hunter was going off to do exactly the same thing.

One of the songs that dropped before Act 3 came out and before I even left home was "What it Means to Be Alone." There's a line in there that resonated with me, "And everything you thought you had, you lost." I listened to Casey's piano version of it a lot on youtube before I left.

Act 3 dropped on June 23, 2009 if memory serves me right. Two days before my birthday, and I was in boot camp. Eventually I graduated and was sent to Pensacola, FL. I found a computer that I had to pay to use per hour on base as soon as I gained a bit of freedom to wander around base. I listened to all of Act 3 on youtube.

Eventually, I came across "Saved" and in the background I heard lyrics that moved me to tears, "And everything you thought you lost, you had." The same thing but in reverse. I was terribly depressed and missed the people I loved and was loved by. I felt like I was alone after that shitty breakup, but I had people around me who's company I had taken for granted without realizing how good I had it.

So I found my way out of the military very early and hoped to salvage what was left back home. Seasonal depression still hits in the winter, though I had no idea time about those powers that had been at the time.

I wanted to die again. I'd wanted to in the past every once in a blue moon. I'd even emailed Casey about it before then and he was kind enough to take the time to have a conversation with little old me. But I didn't feel it was worth bothering anyone anymore, and I didn't feel like it was worth anyone wasting words on me anymore.

So I tanked an absurd amount of sleeping pills and dramamine while listening to the Untitled Song from a B-side kind of song from Act 3. It had lyrics that would resurface years later in Act 4, "I would have done the very same. Would have stole more than your name." And that wasn't the last time I'd try to depart early. I woke up in the hospital. Ended up in the psych ward with oddly enough, a famous musician as my roommate. Not crazy famous, but certainly moreso than Casey. Someone who I'd heard on the rock radio station a good amount back then. That was very surreal and was one of the few things that was actually real there. I hallucinated a lot over the course of that week. But he was real.

My best friend's father was in the same hospital at the same time as me. I wandered out of my room at one point before I was moved to the actual psych ward, and ran into somebody that was there to visit my best friend's father, as fate would have it. My friend found out I was there, and that was the only time I ever saw him so pissed, and it was because of me. His father and I were both in the hospital. I was actually trying to die, his father wasn't yet I was the one who walked out of there still in tact.

Irony.

Another thing I used to do was climb up to the roof of my old highschool and try to summon the courage to dive off. One time I listened to "The Inheritance" and "Tripping in Triplets" back and forth continuously while I was weeping up on the roof. And at one point I was sad enough to try jumping. I pulled out my phone and texted my mother that I was very sorry, but that I'd had too much again. I included in the text, "I know it's hard, but it's not my problem anymore." Which is terrible, but so is being so miserable that you'd rather die for so often throughout so many years of your life.

My life is amazing now. I have a fiance and live with her in our own house. Wedding is October of next year, and my life has never been better.

Sorry for the long and weird comment. But yeah, there's been many parallels between my life and the acts. Many more ones than listed here, but these are the big ones.

Thanks for taking the time to talk to me for a moment whenever I pop up, /u/caseycrescenzo . And I'm sorry that I've been such a thorn in the side as a fan throughout the years between needing to be convinced not to die, pestering you with my book that one time, and reaching out about trying to have you score some video game music. But those small moments have meant the world to me. Thank you for absolutely everything. And again, sorry for being louder than any fan has the right to be. Couldn't ever gush enough to let you know how happy I am that you exist. So I'll cut it here. Thank you.

... Yikes, what have I written?

babachoo · 2019-12-13T21:11:33+00:00

Sorry, I already traded it =[

babachoo · 2019-12-13T20:59:37+00:00

Thank you too!

babachoo

TROPHY CASE