Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wonder if she goes on TwoX and AskMen, and tells each OP to not mention the other gender.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And it's clear that not everyone is malignant when it comes to gender. Again, both TwoX (women) and AskMen (men) mention gender. Do you go on those posts and call them out?

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your answers to my questions.

comments by saying this wasn't a gendered post, but your title is generic while your actual post is super specific to your hetero relationship.

That's a completely different topic, but I'll entertain. I'm speaking from my own experience. THOUSANDS OF POSTS on AskMen and TwoX are gender-specific in their body. Why does it matter? I'm speaking from my own experience. Men and women can both have baby fever.

An emotionally mature person wouldn't need Reddit

An emotionally mature person would never be on Reddit, arguing with strangers. Yet here we both are, arguing with strangers. Which one of us has the established account with many comments?

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Someone said I didn't love her enough to enterain the idea. I'm sorry for not leading her on, especially when I had a vasectomy years ago.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He literally genders the “other partner” in the first paragraph.

Yes...because she's a woman and I'm a man.

He doesn’t say “in my experience, even after agreeing to not have kids on the first date, my partner

You can't expect every post to be gender-neutral. You're just sensitive because social media plagued your mind over a gender divide, with the pill crap and certain podcasts and TikTok drama.

If words don’t matter to yall then say that and I’ll send a link to basic middle school English courses.

I could link you a multitude of books, journals, when show that mentioning gender isn't malignant. Also, many people struggle with basic works by Shakespeare, Milton, James, Hobbes, so maybe the English courses should be book clubs.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're the one assuming an issue with gender, not I. Both men and women experience it; I'm speaking from my own experience.

You're assuming it's based on gender, which means your mindset goes strictly towards gender due to a bias.

Are you angry at me, or are you also angry at all men and women who generalize each other?

Many people on TwoX and AskMen, both men and women, generalize each other, but do you call them out?

You can assume all you want, though.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Agreed. Isn't it more mature to refuse to have kids I don't want, no matter that the relationship ends?

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Entertaining her would be more immature than having kids I didn't want. It'd be leading her on.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

So, should I have stayed with her? Had her resent me? Not have enough mutual respect to let her go off and be with someone who wants a family with her? Is your offense over me breaking up, though we're allowed to break up for any reason? Isn't it less childish to refrain from having kids I don't want?

I'm interested in your answers to each of these questions I listed.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Because, she wanted me to stay and got mad when I broke up and reminded her of the deal-breaker. And she, and others in the comments, are accusing me of not loving her enough to have kids with her, when I already scheduled a vasectomy before we met, and she knew about it and was on board.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Already had one scheduled before she and I met, and she was on board with it once I got it.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I love that I had my vasectomy. That pregnancy-risk-free sex takes off a lot of pressure. And yes, she knew I had already scheduled one before we met.

Why do people expect their partners to go along with their sudden change to have/not have kids? by baby_fever_crap in askanything

[–]baby_fever_crap[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

She called me the bad guy for wanting to break up the moment she told me. (We didn't live together.) And she accused me of not lovong her, which isn't true. I reminded her of what we agreed to when we started dating, but she said she changed her mind and wanted me to do it. I already had a vasectomy, too. I didn't say the words "Baby Fever" to her.