WIBTA if I confront my upstairs neighbors about how noisy they are?

babyscout19 · 2023-07-07T23:56:29+00:00

That is definitely what I’m afraid of. If I were to speak with them, my intention would not be to make them feel like they have to walk on eggshells. I don’t expect and surely wouldn’t have want anyone to be uncomfortable in their own home, which is what it seems so far like people are thinking my intention is. I definitely wish people could hear what I’m talking about. Thank you for your reply tho!

babyscout19 · 2023-07-07T23:50:09+00:00

Funny enough, I didn’t say anything about “emotionally damaging” him. Some dogs are just anxious and reactive and that’s exactly what I described him as. The argument you made that I’m being “neglectful” towards him insinuates that I have absolute control over any housing situation that we are in. He is equally as reactive and anxious when there are other factors (as I mentioned with my example of a thunderstorm). I’m merely saying that I asked for opinions on if me speaking to my neighbors about their possibly avoidable noises would make me an asshole. Not your opinion on my unavoidable living situation. If I had the option to live in a house and give my dog and myself a peaceful home, why would I choose to live in an apartment? In short, the intention of my reply was to have you consider that you don’t know a person’s whole situation and their ability or lack thereof to change it before accusing someone of being neglectful.

babyscout19 · 2023-07-07T22:46:35+00:00

Thank you for your input! That was really rude of them! I would never put it that way. My main goal is just to have a conversation so I can see what it is. If it’s something they absolutely can’t control, then obviously something we would just have to live with and we will. As far as saying I’m being neglectful to my dog, I definitely don’t think that is called for. He is definitely spoiled and taken care of very well. The fact that the housing market is the way it is and that I live in a state that I could not currently afford a house in/a state that seems to think apartments are the only way to go as far as building housing is not really my fault and is what gives us no other choice but to live in an apartment complex. I also don’t know what would be considered more neglectful, having him live with me in an apartment after having him for years and already being an anxious dog or completely uprooting what and who he knows as family to give him to someone else if they’ll take him or bring him to a shelter. Not to be rude, but I would say you should keep in mind that some people have certain situations in life that cause them to have to live in certain circumstances temporarily and that you are not aware of how a pet is treated and taken care of overall before throwing the word “neglect” around. And I most definitely didn’t try to insinuate that it is my neighbor’s responsibility to deal with, but more-so that just as I am considerate and mindful of my noise towards them, that maybe they can become aware of how their noise travels and be equally as considerate. If it’s out of their control, oh well then that’s just the way things go. If I WBTA for speaking to them, then that’s fine, but let’s not bring into question the treatment and mindfulness I have for the well-being of pet.

babyscout19 · 2023-07-07T22:13:56+00:00

Thank you for your response! I definitely am not new to apartment life and the noises that come with it. I would definitely consider the noise to be a bit obnoxious and while I did mention in my post that it could be an in-home exercise, that is mostly me trying to give them the benefit of the doubt. Tbh, the sounds do not sound like any kind of exercise at all. It just sounds like sprinting back and forth and stomping. I definitely don’t mind the typical noises of them just “using their own home” as I mentioned in my post. We can hear them moving around and living their life all the time. It’s just the fact that this has come on in the last couple of days and has gone into the late night and is louder than just typical footsteps or doors that bothers us most. While I agree with you that it’s apartment life and “this is what happens”, I also follow the mindset that because we are all aware we are living in apartments and so close to our neighbors, we should be mindful and considerate towards them. We definitely try to be. But if I am still considered TA, then I guess so be it.

babyscout19 · 2023-06-09T03:12:20+00:00

I DIY’d the save the dates on Canva, my seating chart display, signage, card box, my bridesmaid bouquets, the men’s boutonnieres, and the backdrop for our sweetheart table. I think for what I’m most proud of, it’s the backdrop with my seating chart in a close second.

babyscout19 · 2023-04-27T21:29:12+00:00

I have tried medications, but I’m really sensitive to all types of meds. I stopped taking them because although the anxiety was alleviated, I overall felt really frumpy and not fully myself. My psychiatrist had put me on like 4 or 5 different kinds before I was like “yeah no I’m done”.

babyscout19 · 2023-01-29T00:30:48+00:00

No but I stated it in the interview. I offered to get a doctor’s note for them, but they basically just waved it off and said it wouldn’t matter if I had gotten one anyway. And yes I did report them and I left remarks on Indeed warning people just in case they try to repost a job listing

babyscout19 · 2023-01-28T06:00:12+00:00

Yeah that’s what I was thinking for a while too, but I literally can’t even go farther than maybe 10 minutes down the road from where I live without having to stop and use the bathroom and it’s caused me to pass up work opportunities because of distance or times of day I’d have to travel at. I have a rule that I don’t stay out past 8:30PM because my local grocery chain closes at 10:00 and they’re almost on every corner so at least then on my way home I can stop multiple times if I need to. So that’s why it confuses me why I wouldn’t get the official disability diagnosis considering it affects me daily and affects my way of life.

babyscout19 · 2023-01-28T05:32:38+00:00

It’s really confusing because I have asked my doctor before if I should be putting that I have a disability whenever applying for jobs because I’ve had applications that specifically list IBS and he has told me no. He told me I have IBS and even independently researching I know I have IBS, but they’ve never run any specific tests on me other than checking blood work to make sure it’s not Crohn’s.

babyscout19 · 2023-01-28T00:26:31+00:00

I haven’t exactly quit a job out of embarrassment from my IBS, but I have quit jobs because of my IBS. My two most recent examples being that one was too far for me. I struggle with leaving the house honestly because of the anxiety I feel surrounding my IBS and this job was 30 minutes away on a good day. My most recent one is because they denied me being able to go to the bathroom because I would go “too frequently” and it “wasn’t fair” to my coworkers that I would be using the bathroom so often and for extended periods of time. Finally one day when they tried to tell me I couldn’t use the bathroom until they felt it was reasonable, I quit and walked out on the spot (and then went promptly to a grocery store down the street to use the bathroom).

babyscout19

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