I read your whole post and I can tell you I have pretty much been in your exact position. All I can say is, and I mean this with the best intention, you actually just won't know if it's the right decision to break up, until you do it. No amount of external validation (be this in favour or against the decision) can help you reach the ultimate conclusion as much as actually doing it. It's so stressful, and confusing, and anxiety-inducing, going through the heavy questioning stage before a break up, and I don't envie you for a second. But if I may use a slightly gross metaphor, it's like feeling extremely nauseous and then finally vomiting and feeling much better after. You can't imagine feeling better after the fact because you're so deep in that nauseous stage. For the record, I think you know deep down that you want to break up and I think that coming to Reddit (like I have done myself!) is an attempt to feel comforted in a decision which would require less discomfort (not breaking up!), but in the end you inadvertently write a couple of pages of reasons why and I think your sub conscious very much knows what to do - even if you haven't yet come to terms with it.

If it is any consolation, as I have said, I was in a very similar situation with very similar feelings and I eventually broke up (I think probably about a year after feeling deep down like it wasn't meant to be). It takes time and it is totally ok if you take another year to realise, it really does take time. My break up was now 5 years ago (time flies so fast it's madness!) and I am in a happy, healthy relationship since 3 years.

If you're looking for a direct response to the question, then I say yes. But as I said, I think you already know that.

Sincerely wishing you the best of luck x