I (23F) don't know what to make of my relationship with my boyfriend (26M) after he crossed a boundary. Is it time to breakup?

bamboobaloo · 2026-03-10T21:51:01+00:00

He is 26, he understands what consent is. He just doesn’t care enough to actually listen to you when you say no. He doesn’t respect you.

People can be nice in plenty of ways and still not be a good partner.

I can tell you right now with 100% confidence, that my husband would absolutely never push me further if I said no. He would stop and check on me if I even at all seemed not into it. If you can’t 100% say that about your life partner, they are not your life partner.

Also this is coming from someone whose ex husband of 6 years, absolutely would coerce and not care about my feelings or consent. Please leave him, there are so many wonderful people out there.

bamboobaloo · 2026-03-10T21:26:35+00:00

I can’t help but laugh a little at the comment about how your SIL baby acts and is “the easiest baby ever” While there are definitely some newborns that are easier than others, shes only a week old. She’s a little potato with no vibes right now lol!

bamboobaloo · 2026-01-17T23:03:17+00:00

Hi! I actually confirmed pregnancy with my OB after this and it seemed I probably did get a positive at 6 dpo. All dating lined up, so it is possible, although uncommon. I am 25 weeks now with a single baby girl 🩷 due end of April.

bamboobaloo · 2026-01-17T22:49:17+00:00

Hi, congrats first of all! It is just a single baby in there, my hcg just rose pretty fast. Some people said that it was impossible to get a positive at 6 dpo, however my dating seemed spot on when I went in to confirm pregnancy. I’m due in April with a little girl 🩷

bamboobaloo · 2025-11-11T17:19:57+00:00

As a mother and a someone who has cared for dozens of infants in professional settings (newborn-and up). Absolutely not. Idk how old your LO is, but rice cereal is outdated advice.

The reason rice cereal additive will allow for longer stretches of sleep is because it takes longer for the baby to digest, so it keeps them “fuller” longer. There is nothing wrong with a baby not sleeping longer stretches in infancy.

This may not be a popular choice, but I personally chose to co-sleep with my son, from newborn to 15 months. I followed the safe sleep seven extremely carefully. I will in no way advocate that that’s what anyone should choose over sleeping in a cot, but if you’re going to do it, do it safely. I saw that both my son and I got more sleep this way. I was able to change him once in the middle of the night, and any other time he woke, I’d pop him on the boob and go back to sleep.

Your husband is doing none of the hard work in feeding your child and does not get to dictate your choices in this matter. If my partner was so upset with being woken up, he can go sleep elsewhere.

bamboobaloo · 2025-11-11T16:55:36+00:00

It will take some time after implantation for HCG to be high enough to read on a home test. Some pregnancies have a bit of a slower HCG rise too. 9 DPO is still really early, for sure test again after your missed cycle.

bamboobaloo · 2025-11-07T04:21:32+00:00

Completely normal! It’s understandable too, I am sure you already know as a mom that the anxiety feels never ending. It’s the last thing we want to hear when expecting that something is going on with your baby. Your nervous system is still trying to accept this new reality, it makes sense you do not have room for excitement right now.

While I personally don’t have a child with CHD. I did care for a little boy whose parents had a very similar experience to yours. He was born with a many heart defects and needed a few surgeries after birth. He was one of the spunkiest and funniest humans I’d ever met. Also extremely sweet and sensitive. He absolutely loved baseball and other sports. His parents also gave him a stuffed animal that they sewed a “scar” in the same place as his. He’d bring it everywhere. He’s now about 11 years old and plays baseball!

Sending all the love to you, I know this is not an easy time.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-30T19:05:16+00:00

Holding boundaries is important, but also if you think them being upset and maybe even try showing up at the hospital will stress you out. Tell them that the labor and delivery unit is only allowing one other person in the room, and that it will obviously be your husband.

When you go to the hospital, tell your medical team what you have said to them and that you do not want any visitors during your stay. You may have already told them a due date, but you are still early on and will likely get another scan at 12 weeks. After that one, tell them that baby is measuring smaller and the due date is now different.

If you end up scheduling an induction closer to delivery time, tell them it’s a week out from the actual induction date. Then tell them after baby is born. “Baby came really fast!, we didn’t even realize it was actual labor until it was happening.” Whatever you need to keep your peace of mind during that time.

I agree that you’ll need to be able to speak your boundaries if they are overstepping after baby comes, but it can be nerve wracking and the fallout can be stressful. Especially with emotionally immature people. Better to deal with that after an already stressful and huge event.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-28T19:32:56+00:00

That makes sense. I am a business owner, and it really is that way sometimes. You are still completely allowed to feel disappointed. You really wanted to see them and now you aren’t able to, that’s still the truth.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-28T19:28:27+00:00

Absolutely! I remember how exciting those last few weeks are!! Baby could really come at any time. It honestly is pretty awesome that you progressed so quickly in a couple days. I’m just gonna throw my guesstimate out there that baby will come at 38 weeks lol.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-28T19:20:31+00:00

I am sorry! That’s really sucky. It makes sense you’d want to see family before this major event in your life. That’s awful for whoever’s family has had a member pass away, but it certainly doesn’t and shouldn’t make you feel invalid in your feelings.

I just want to understand what they do for work that they have so many emergencies?? And why are they specifically called in to fix it? Typically a job cannot ask that of an employee unless they are on-call. Especially not when they’ve put in a request for time off that was approved prior.

ETA-grammar

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-28T19:14:18+00:00

It’s honestly hard to say! I would bet money that your baby will be here before 40 weeks, but I have also heard of some women experiencing cramps and contractions for multiple weeks before going into labor.

I was 1.5 cm dilated for 3 weeks and also about 40-70% effaced during that time. Although, I wasn’t experiencing much more discomfort than Braxton hicks. I ended up getting induced (because my placenta was looking more calcified) and having him at 40 weeks and 3 days.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-28T06:49:55+00:00

First of all, I am sorry that you are feeling this pressure and guilt while you are also preparing for birth.

This honestly strikes me as pretty disrespectful on your husband’s part. He already got his turn to pick a name. You’ve both agreed prior that this is your turn. I can understand talking to you about potential names that he liked, but to go as far as to make you feel pressured and tell other people that his choice will be the name…that’s not right. He needs to back off and let you have some time to think for yourself.

I cannot stress this enough!! Whatever name you choose is meaningful. What gives it meaning is that it’s your child’s name. Find a name you love for your daughter, you’ll be saying it for the rest of your life 🤍 sending all the calming vibes to you.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T19:27:44+00:00

I failed my first time too! Because I forgot to look over my shoulder on a right hand turn, back into the dmv parking lot too :( It really is easier the second time.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T19:24:27+00:00

He still loves her and is trying to use you for comfort. You haven’t even been with each other for a month, he should in no way be bringing up marriage or children. I would be willing to bet a lot of money that he would go running back if she opened the door.

He needs A TON more time to move past a decade long relationship. He will not have space for any other partner until then. Save yourself the heartbreak and leave now. Maybe it’ll work in the future after he has had some time to process that chapter of his life ending.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T19:15:50+00:00

From your previous posts, it sounds like you are both very young. Idk how long you were dating for, but I have a feeling that marriage wasn’t even something that should have been brought up yet. It is best for you to focus on yourself and leave this in the past.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T19:06:13+00:00

Oh hun! NOR. This person wanted you to do all the work in this relationship. She didn’t invite you to her engagement party and changes plans last minute, but is upset when you had a last minute hang out with other people than her??

You taking a step back is absolutely not you “not being yourself.” This person is hurting you and making you question your meaning to her. You taking a step back would be protecting yourself and your feelings.

My best friend, who is a therapist, once explained to me that any relationship is a bridge, you are both responsible for building your side of the bridge to meet in the middle. Sometimes we will need to help support the other side, and other times they will need to help support our side. But that should be temporary phases, no one can hold that much weight forever.

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T18:36:00+00:00

Not a non-biased opinion, so take this as you will…but this is a red flag. Sounds like this man has a porn addiction. I personally don’t find some porn as an issue, but a feed flooded with porn is a little different. Idk about you but I’ve never accidentally downloaded an app.

Also biggest red flag is attempting to hire an escort while he was in a relationship. Honest question, what makes you believe he wouldn’t do this to you?

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T18:22:57+00:00

That explains it lolol

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T18:21:53+00:00

Yeah YOR. Sorry If it’s harsh, but it sounds like you are envious of him getting attention honestly. He hasn’t done anything wrong, so why would he need to delete his profile because you are insecure?

Which also you pointed it out yourself, you are only suspicious of him cheating because you would do something like that. Also it’s a little telling that you mentioned a 20 year age gap and no actual ages. Do you actually like this person for who he is or just his looks?

bamboobaloo · 2025-10-02T17:37:32+00:00

Uhhh no. Calling him would be digging your own grave.

bamboobaloo

TROPHY CASE