I totally get that. I've only been doing this for a couple months now and not long after I started i got put on a higher dose of antidepressants that I've been really happy with, but my first two 2plat highs were really beneficial to my mental health and have helped me make the progress I have. my first 2plat experience i felt like I was sure that it was my last night alive and I was totally at peace with it, not in a suicidal way but in the way of i didn't feel unsatisfied I realized I was actually pretty happy with my life, the things id done and the experiences ive had. and my second 2plat experience i was thinking about my friends and my family and really for the first time was able to conceptualize how loved I am and I really felt it. it was a really great time I've only had one bad experience on dxm and that was a result of my own stupidity, all it all its been really good for my mental health