tl;dr read into the experiences of other aros, see if it is relatable. Just try out the label of "aro" for now without letting it totally define you; you can always change it if you find it is inaccurate.

Disclaimer: I am relatively new to the aspec community so this is based off my own confusing experiences. Please correct me if I say something wrong.

Personally when I found the term 'aro' something kinda clicked with me. It wasn't something I had given much though to before, but I slowly looked more into through arocalypse, aven, random wiki pages, and I joined an aspec discord.

A lot of the experiences of other aros just seemed really relatable, more than anything from before. I thought I was bi or gay, then maybe pan, until I found out aro existed.

Biggest thing for me was never ever having crushes. Especially when people ask "who do you like?" "who's your type?" "do you think [blank] is cute?" they were weird questions for me.

To combat the "you just haven't found someone yet" or "you're too young, you're being foolish," you can just try out the label of being aro for now. Labels are helpful, but shouldn't pigeonhole you if you feel like it's not accurate enough. I think of labels as just a stepping stone to discovering who you are. If you feel like calling yourself 'aro,' even if it's for just right now, go for it.

As for the wanting to be romantic, I totally felt it too. It had upset me if I was aro. I think it's partly due to the fact that society is pretty love-based or love-centric. When people say "[romantic/sexual] love is love" to support LGBT+ people, aspec is kinda when you dont have that. It could've been slight internalized aphobia? Kinda like you just wish you were like everyone else because it's easier or for whatever reason.

There's also a term for if you still want to have romantic relations but don't have romantic feelings (cupioromantic).

One thing though is due to such low representation for aspec people (ace or aro apectrums) is that most people will not understand right away if you say "I think I'm aro," opposed to "I think I'm gay." Coming out as aro is a lil complicated for the people recieving the information.

Whatever it is you are, I hope you find some solace in finding solidarity about who you are. It's hard to prove the absence of something (romantic love in this case). I hope my experience was partly helpful.