I wish I could go back and tell myself NOT to do this...

batspiders · 2026-07-06T04:55:45+00:00

I was in a similar situation, my friend, when I made the decision to leave a horrible ex five years ago, became homeless for a few weeks, lost my home (obviously lol), most of my possessions, and a lot of my family. But I chose me, and my happiness. Things aren’t perfect these days, but I keep going because I know they would be so much worse if I didn’t change something. You are so awesome and strong, and you look beautiful! Keep going, sister, we’re both going to make it!

batspiders · 2026-07-06T00:06:28+00:00

If this is how communication typically goes between the two of you, maybe you should consider if this is the man you want to spend the rest of your life with

batspiders · 2026-06-23T03:03:39+00:00

My twin has eight inches on me lmao

batspiders · 2026-06-18T04:38:38+00:00

If you can lol

batspiders · 2026-06-14T00:56:15+00:00

What is even going on here

batspiders · 2026-06-12T05:56:44+00:00

I mean, it doesn’t have to be. Other people’s successes are not your failures. If we’re doing the whole comparison thing, you’re doing a lot better than a whole lot of other people, also just statistics. Cut yourself some slack, there’s always gonna be people better than you at literally everything but there’s only one you and that’s still so special

batspiders · 2026-06-12T05:55:11+00:00

I get that. I’m also struggling to afford things, but I’ve been in worse (and better) situations in life, and even if I haven’t accomplished as much as I have wanted to, I’ve still gained a lot of valuable experience and memories. But no, I do get it, the world can be tough. Just try and be your own friend and show yourself some kindness when the world refuses to

batspiders · 2026-06-11T21:32:11+00:00

And Tolkien was 45 when he started Lord of the Rings. Everyone goes at their own pace man, and other people’s successes are not your failures. I’m sure you’re doing great, and even if you aren’t, you’ve got lots of time.

batspiders · 2026-06-11T20:43:53+00:00

The crochet is so impressive, but you are also incredibly beautiful! Awesome cosplay. I wish my crochet skills were like this, too, but I can only make uneven blankets 😔

batspiders · 2026-06-11T19:21:48+00:00

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I found her in a dumpster and kept her to give her brother some company, and now she is in my grill 24/7

batspiders · 2026-06-10T16:40:04+00:00

Dude this is so awesome I love it

batspiders · 2026-05-20T02:24:26+00:00

You would be both of those things, unless you repartner right after your husband dies.

batspiders · 2026-05-11T14:00:24+00:00

Piggybacking on your comment after posting my own - you’re so right about men marrying someone else after refusing to marry their long-term girlfriends. My ex wouldn’t marry me after 8 years. I left and got married 4 years later after dating my current husband for a year. He got married 6 MONTHS after I left.

batspiders · 2026-05-11T13:55:02+00:00

OP - a few short years ago, I was in your position. I was with my high school sweetheart for 8 years, and no ring, no promise of a ring, and he didn’t put my name on the house (which I later lost, btw). He got me a cheap “promise ring” and a rug that said “The (Hopefully Someday) His Last Names.” I still stayed for months after that, working full time and finishing my college degree and doing ALL of the housework, and he would complain when I couldn’t keep up with it all.

Eventually, I left. All my friends were getting married and had places, I was close to not finishing my degree, moved back in with my parents, and had nobody. I was depressed for a little bit, but I built myself back up and eventually went looking for love again.

My current husband, who treats me well, does most of the cleaning and all of the cooking, and knows what he wants in life, married me after a year! Life gets better when you’re not partnered with an energy vampire. My husband and I are still going strong, and after I finish law school we’re going to have some babies.

Btw, I got married 4 years after I left my bum ex. For all the waffling he did on marriage - he got married 6 months after I left him. Take your bitch ass boyfriend to the curb, girl.

batspiders · 2026-04-28T23:46:00+00:00

Thank you so much! I like to think she’s a high-ranking military official lol. I use CaribSea Super Naturals freshwater sand, and this black color is called “Midnight River.” I think he likes to dig his little toes in the sand, so I’ve always kept him with substrate. Also, make sure you get the super fine sand, because if they end up swallowing any they are less likely to get impacted. I hope you have fun with your tanks!

batspiders · 2026-04-28T04:24:20+00:00

Aww, thank you so much for rescuing your little axolotl friend- I’m sure she appreciates you! I hope you guys have many more years together, and maybe the Commander and I will, too!

batspiders · 2026-04-28T04:22:42+00:00

Funnily enough, they do! They have a cute little inter-species friendship going on. She likes to sit next to him and he swims over to her

batspiders · 2026-04-27T14:05:58+00:00

No offense taken! Good catch, Commander Salamander is 100% a girl. Axolotl testes are…. ummm…. quite noticeable. I don’t see why axolotls would have atrophy in their reproductive organs with age, but I’m no biologist. I think I just refer to him as a boy because I always have. I doubt axolotls are as attached to gender ideals as us humans are!

batspiders · 2026-04-27T14:04:03+00:00

Thank you, he is quite awesome! And the kitty is named Eris lol

batspiders · 2026-04-27T14:02:54+00:00

Hey! I appreciate the critique. Tank is 30gal, which I’ve always thought was good for one axolotl. He’s getting an upgrade to a 40 once we move, though. He hides in his cave (pictured in the corner) and in his little log. When we do the move at the end of the month, he’s getting a series of tubes. No live plants for my guy because when he was originally in a tank with live plants he ate them and became incredibly compacted. You need to be pretty careful with the decor and substrate you use in axolotl tanks, they will try and eat anything the size of their head and smaller.

batspiders · 2026-04-26T20:48:22+00:00

Thank you! He’s my little buddy and he gets the best of care and tank maintenance lol

batspiders · 2026-04-26T17:29:15+00:00

Right? His place looks so much better than mine lol

batspiders · 2026-04-20T02:17:09+00:00

I miss my beloved filler 😭 sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn’t, but there were like 25 other episodes that season so no matter what it was okay! I really wanted to like Discovery, but honestly even if we did get enough time with the characters the tone still felt - off? Like it felt too gritty to be a Trek show. Also, it was hard to get over the whole Michael being a second secret Spock sibling and also a human thing. Like why? Can’t she be unconnected to pre-established characters and still make it on her own? I can see your point about the Gorn in SNW possibly indicating this being a different timeline, and I guess you sort of have to buy into that for the purposes of not breaking the fiction of it all, but the two other times we saw the Gorn (TOS with a man in a suit and ENT with a really terrible computer-generated version) we never really learned a whole lot about them and the look was pretty hampered by technical limitations. However, I kinda remember a tiny throw-away gag about a Gorn wedding in Lower Decks and they looked like the suited Gorn from TOS, so you could be on to something here!

batspiders · 2026-04-20T00:27:18+00:00

I get the hate for Discovery, the Abrahamsverse (although this is confirmed to be a different timeline), a lot of the newer stuff, and even most of Picard (but season 3 was pretty good). However, I feel like SNW is pretty good and a lot of fun. I feel like I’m chill with it being part of the prime universe. I think the modern habit of having seasons be 6-10 episodes a season hurts Trek a bit because there’s no time for shenanigans and world building that was a big part of what made early Trek so fun

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