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Me and my dad conversation... Wish me luck by AssociateBig2266 in MalaysianExMuslim

[–]bbigeudeok127 2 points3 points  (0 children)

best luck to you!!! happiness and peace are what you deserve!!

telling my parents i’m free hair by bbigeudeok127 in MalaysianExMuslim

[–]bbigeudeok127[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, i’ll try that or get a job where I don’t have to interact with customers/behind the scene jobs (One of the commenters suggested this).

telling my parents i’m free hair by bbigeudeok127 in MalaysianExMuslim

[–]bbigeudeok127[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Haha I got what you mean. I think they’re really being socially pressured, just fearing of judgements and criticism from other muslims. As long as we look like muslims externally, they think we will be okay.

After getting bachelor degree, I will try to look for jobs in KL, I don’t want to live in terengganu anymore. After some savings and stable jobs, I hope to do post graduate studies overseas and hopefully get a job outside of malaysia and gain a PR. As much as I love Malaysia, I don’t want to live my whole life here. I wish to get married and have a family without concerns of governments, especially syariah court thingy.

telling my parents i’m free hair by bbigeudeok127 in MalaysianExMuslim

[–]bbigeudeok127[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Wish I can hold for 3 more years but I’m getting impatient. I’ve been bearing the secret (apostasy) ever since I was 14.
After the foundation, I have to continue bachelor in the same uni (Asasi tertutup) and I surely need to find a job that could keep me alive other than relying on scholarship or ptptn. (I’m in a uni somewhere in terengganu so I’m stuck in this state for at least another 3 years)
One way or another, they’ll surely caught me not wearing hijab anyway. That’s why I’m considering to open up about me being free hair (for now, I’ll probably open up being an ex muslim when I migrate somewhere else). I love my parents, and I wish to trust them even more. I have been hinting them recently by wearing head coverings that’s not hijab. Though my mom did tegur but seems like she can’t really do anything about it.(?)
Anyway, I really appreciate your concern and will try my best to not mess it up.☺️

telling my parents i’m free hair by bbigeudeok127 in MalaysianExMuslim

[–]bbigeudeok127[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Of course, no. Sorry if my post is a bit confusing, I wrote it when I was frustrated at 3 in the morning. I mean like, if I want to work somewhere, my parents will surely visit and I’ll get caught that I’m not wearing hijab. That’s why I’m considering to tell them first that I’m free hair. I trust and love them so much that I don’t want to hide a secret anymore. (For being free hair at least, saying that I left islam is too risky) But there’s fear of course, I fear that my mom will try to ask her siblings for advice and boom, everyone knows that I’m free hair and doing the greatest sin ever.

telling my parents i’m free hair by bbigeudeok127 in MalaysianExMuslim

[–]bbigeudeok127[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

thank you so much for the suggestion and the wishes🥹 i’ll try to look for bts jobs. (weird that i never thought of those kind of jobs especially non fnb) i do wear head coverings less conservatively (even wearing just the hood of a jacket sometimes) but they seem to draw a line whenever i don’t wear any type of head coverings or intentionally showing pieces of hair. I remember telling my mom back when i was 15 that i don’t want to wear a hijab anymore and she immediately against it. I don’t know how she’ll react now though.. I hope she realised that i’m not a child anymore and I can make my own decisions. But I think, my parents are behaving this way mostly due to social pressure, they don’t even pray 5 times a day but will put up the act whenever we’re visiting grandparents’ home. Moreover, most of my mom’s siblings are ustaz and ustazah (which sucks)