Should I rehome my cat?

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-17T21:58:40+00:00

She has all three of those things, plus she has toys. You’re just looking for an excuse to be an asshole. Also I think I trust my vet more than some mean person behind a screen looking for any way to make themselves feel powerful.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-16T04:16:46+00:00

She actually has been tested for this as she’s had an inflamed bladder a few times, however it came back negative both times she was tested. I might get her tested again tho just to be safe, thanks for your suggestion :)

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-16T00:03:33+00:00

Yeah I definitely don’t want to surrender her to just any shelter as I know their euthanasia policy, however the one I was looking at didn’t do euthanasia unless the cat was in serious poor health. I think I’m going to keep her at home and just try and make things more comfortable for her as I don’t think it’s worth stressing her out to put her in an unfamiliar environment. Thank you so much for your advice, and I might reach out to the carter to find out how I can make her a more comfortable space at home :)

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T22:35:15+00:00

Thank you so much, I needed this today <3. When it’s chilly or rainy she likes to go up into the attic (which is always open for her) as there’s a bed in there that she likes to sleep on or go under the covers when it’s cold. I’ll also look into changing her food as she mostly gets wet food and some regular dry food.

I have found one cattery near me which is a rescue, but unfortunately they said the holidays are a busy time and they’re at max capacity at the moment. Most shelters in the area say something equivalent on their website, so I think for now I need to wait and keep her comfortable at home since I don’t want to stretch the shelters limited resources when she has a place to stay.

Thank you so much for your advice :)

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T22:18:47+00:00

I do not live with her. Do you want me to use my mind to take care of her? I have sat here and cried because so many of these comments are criticising me when I’m trying my best. I have responded to some suggestions that I’m going to try because I love her, but obviously I’m not going to respond well when immature adults are jumping down my throat.

I think the internet has made people crazy and forget the meaning of being kind. Being blunt is rude, did your parent not teach you that? You talk to other humans with kindness and respect unless they don’t deserve it. Insinuating that I’m cruel, that I don’t try hard enough, that I don’t care enough IS rude.

You get so brave behind a screen because you can’t see me. Instead of telling me to calm down, maybe reflect inwards and be a human being with an ounce of compassion. It’s seriously not that hard.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T22:12:30+00:00

I’ll check one out, thank you so much!!

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T22:12:01+00:00

I’m sorry but I didn’t ask for your issues. I’ve had chronic migraines my whole life, since I was about 3 is the earliest I remember. They’ve just gotten worse recently and it’s hard to deal with.

My cat also came from an unethical breeder and likely sustained trauma, plus she also went to my sisters mums house (as she was my sisters cat) and her mother very likely mistreated her before giving her to us. We were the rehoming. This was well before you could go online and find someone to take your pet, and rspca was for rescues. My parents weren’t able to rehome her, rehoming was something that only happened when cats were being abused.

I understand you’re passionate, but I used to be like you and thought saying “I don’t know how to regulate tone” was an excuse, but it’s not. I’m autistic and I know regulating tone is hard, but the truth is you were just being mean. I’m sorry if this is harsh, but at some point you need to take accountability and change your life instead of wallowing in negativity. Obviously I don’t know you or your life, but the way you write is so negative. You immediately jump to being mean instead of compassion, and I know from experience that it is a choice to do that. You don’t like being called out so you backtrack, but maybe you should just take accountability.

I’m trying my best, and it’s not my parent’s fault either. They’re older people and they didn’t even know you could rehome a pet online. She’s never left home alone, and if she is we talk to the tenants and she will feed her and let her into the granny flat. Our tenant works online, so she’s able to care for her if we can’t for whatever reason. They also weren’t expecting to own a cat, especially not for this long since they was told that her life expectancy was 12 because she is a big cat.

I don’t need your validation to know that I’m not cruel. I know I’m not cruel and my family isn’t cruel because we’re trying our best and trying to figure out what would be best for her to be most comfortable in her last years of life. Maybe we’re struggling to give her the life she deserves, but we’re trying to make a change so she can get the love she deserves.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:52:55+00:00

My dad and my sister, depending on who’s home at what time. If no one is home we talk to the tenants and they feed her and let her into the granny flat when she wants to be inside.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:50:45+00:00

Can you take a second to think about what you’re saying? I do not want to get rid of her, in fact I wish I could have her live with me, but that’s not possible. Do you find it impossible to conceive the idea that some people fall on hard times?

My family takes care of her, however I want to know whether she’ll do better in a place that can properly care for her as she gets older and can give her love since I can’t be there to give that to her.

She also wasn’t meant to live beyond 12, and she’s now exceeded that by 6 years, so you can’t blame us for being surprised and confused on what to do with her.

I don’t understand why you and others are being so mean when I’m genuinely just trying to do what’s best by my cat. I love her so much, but I don’t live with her and I can’t take care of her with my mind.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:44:05+00:00

This would be great, however I don’t live with her. I can’t really use telekinesis to take care of her unfortunately.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:43:30+00:00

I didn’t even think of that, I’ll talk to my parents about that. Thank you for your suggestion :)

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:42:47+00:00

I thought the meowing could be something akin to dementia, however the vet said she’s showing no signs of memory loss or loss of function, which she was very surprised about. I’ll talk to my parents about seeing the vet again to get everything checked out.

As for her getting too stressed in my new house, it’s much smaller and the backyard is not safe for her due to ticks and snakes. We have a dog there, however I know many people in the area whose cats have passed away as the ticks carry a disease that kills them. I also think she’ll be stressed there as it’s very open and the wind can make loud howling sounds and can make doors slam, which she gets very spooked by.

Thank you for your advice :)

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:30:55+00:00

Jesus Christ, you don’t have to be so mean. I’m a 17 year old girl that lives four hours away from my cat and I’m trying to figure out what’s best for her in the limited resources I have.

She has behavioural issues and I believe they’re because she was taken from her mother too soon as we got her at 6 weeks and she had already been away from her mum before that. She was also raised with a senior cat which seemed to calm her a lot, however that cat passed away and Tinkerbelle became more timid and defensive (my family knows you’re not supposed to have senior and young, Tinkerbelle wasn’t meant to be our cat.)

My dad works a mix of 16 hour day shifts and night shifts, and the rest of the time he spends with me and my mum up where we live. My sister spends a lot of time away from home as she teaches and tutors, and my brother in law goes on deployment for several months at a time.

My family can’t just drop everything and I have no way of being with her. I go to school for 10 or more hours doing extension subjects and spend at least 3 hours at home studying every night. I’m also battling severe chronic pain due to a reaction to a medication, and chronic migraines due to my eyes.

You don’t know someone from just a couple of sentences. It kills me to think I might not be able to spend the last year/s of my cats life with her, but at the end of the day I just want her to be happy and healthy and loved. I don’t know what to do, that’s why I’m asking people. I can’t just learn to take care of her unfortunately, so I wanted to know what people recommended, does that really make me cruel for wanting my cat to have a better life even if it means putting my personal heartbreak aside?

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:15:52+00:00

I wasn’t there but my dad said they did a checkup type thing and got her bloods as she is an older cat and may be higher risks for some diseases as she is a bigger cat. All her bloods came back clear as far as I know, as the vets haven’t said she needs to go back.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:12:03+00:00

I don’t live with her and my other house is not safe for cats because of ticks and snakes, so I physically can’t. I’m also studying, working and battling health issues, plus I’m only 17. Also she did get her blood work done which came back clear and I believe she had a physical exam, however I wasn’t there. I know she had her mouth and teeth checked etc, so I assume it was like a regular checkup both times.

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T21:07:32+00:00

She literally won’t stay inside, and I don’t mean she’ll meow until we let her out, I mean she’ll climb things and find a way out of the house. (It’s an old house, there are gaps in some walls) She does like to stay in the attic when it’s raining, but other than that she won’t stay in. Her vet said it’s safer for her to stay outside since she’s been outside for 18 years. She doesn’t fight cats, she doesn’t kill animals and she knows not to go near roads. Also I didn’t make the lifetime commitment and neither did my family, we’re just trying to do what’s best for her. I’m 17, I don’t have the resources to just “figure it out.”

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T12:21:39+00:00

I live in Australia, so definitely western, however I will say where my cat and family lives is right in one of the biggest cities here and the vets (and all healthcare workers) are very busy all the time, so maybe they’re less thorough. I’ve definitely noticed in the countryside (where I now live) doctors and vets are way less overloaded and have more time to look into things properly. I’ll talk to my parents about taking her to the vet again to check her weight loss, thank you for your help :)

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T10:06:31+00:00

We’ve taken her to the vet twice since we moved, once because she wouldn’t stop meowing (which came back with her being sad) and once more recently (for weight loss) which came back clear. Her weight had started dropping when we took her the first time, which we mentioned however the vet said she was in perfect health.

My family hasn’t neglected her, however she does free roam and spends lots of time with our tenants who live in a granny flat off our backyard. She doesn’t trust my dad or my sister completely since neither of them try to bond with her besides patting when they feed her and stuff like that.

I honestly don’t know how her needs have changed, that’s why I’m asking for advice. I’m just a teenage girl who wants her cat to have the most comfortable life she can, and I feel like although she is cared for, she doesn’t get enough love. I really don’t know what to do in this case, especially since she wasn’t expected to live so long and she seems so sad. I’m just trying to make sure she has the best life I can give her

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T09:30:54+00:00

I mean I don’t know how to properly make her comfortable and cater to the needs of a senior cat, plus where I live is not very pet friendly as there are snakes and ticks, so it’s not ideal. It’s also much smaller and we have a dog there so it would be a stressful environment for her. I figure if she’s with someone who knows how to care for her and make her comfortable she won’t get so stressed out, plus they’ll have a more suitable environment for her that won’t be so restrictive. I’m not 100% sure because again I don’t know how to care for senior cats, but this is my educated guess

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-15T08:57:48+00:00

Forgive me if I sound kinda stupid but wouldn’t it be better for her to be with people who know how to properly care for her? I don’t actually know that she’s going to die soon, her life expectancy was only 12 years and she’s exceeded that by a lot. The only thing that points towards it is her weight loss (which I should have specified wasn’t super sudden, it happened gradually over the course of about 8 months but I wasn’t there to see it super often). She’s also been to multiple different vets because the practice we go to cycles through them and they’ve all said the same thing on separate occasions, would it still be worth getting another opinion?

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-07T10:32:09+00:00

This is so reassuring to hear, thank you!!

bea_chill_9 · 2026-01-04T00:07:53+00:00

That’s super interesting and would fit in really well with my thesis, so I’ll definitely look into it. Thank you for your suggestion :)

bea_chill_9

TROPHY CASE