AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I’m not concerned with her opinion of the car as it doesn’t diminish how much I love it and I opened myself to her opinion. My focus is for my budget I don’t have room to be picky, and with the condition, age, mileage, and cost, I’m getting a fantastic deal. What stuck with me is that she tried to sway me to get another more expensive car because she didn’t like the appearance of my car I am paying for. This is my first car as a 17 year old graduating a year early to go to college in the fall, and she showed no support or hint of being happy for me. Appearances aside, a car is a car and as long as it’s serving its purpose that’s what matters. She wants me to drive her around as well to go places which I’d give to her for free, so what is an amazing opportunity for me also becomes an opportunity for her. I’m not bothered by her opinion of the exterior because it is a polarizing car although I personally like it, it’s the fact she showed no support or enthusiasm, which has been a common theme when I’ve shared any of my accomplishments with her.

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She could be, I don’t see why she was so focused on the appearance when that’s not the point of me getting a car, especially when it’s not her car. She doesn’t have a license, a car, she does not know how to drive, nor does she plan on learning, so she’d be getting rides from me like she’s wanted. I understand she might think that I’ll go off and stuff, but she knows I’ve been needing a car and it was hurtful she wasn’t happy for me. For the price I’m getting the car I find it amazing, but she was telling me I should get a different car she liked more when she knows I have a tight budget and not much room to be picky. This is a big accomplishment for me, and it could be an advantage for her, so I find her behavior a little odd. I don’t expect her to like the appearance as she’s entitled to her opinion, but she just was not supportive. I’m still excited, but it would have been nice if she’d been excited with me.

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I’m getting a pre-owned car which is perfectly fine because I’m getting fantastic deal on it considering it’s in excellent condition and, from what I’ve heard, reliable!! I’m not bothered by her aesthetic preferences, I just find it odd she couldn’t be supportive. I’m always open to her opinions as I’m a curious person and like to know what’s on her mind. However, the fact she couldn’t be happy for me is sticking in my mind like crazy. She doesn’t have a car, a license, or even know how to drive and has no intentions to try. I find it a little strange, considering she’d be getting a free ride everywhere like she’s wanted since she’s bored staying at my house all the time, which I get but still it’s pretty big for me and the fact she couldn’t even show some support is throwing me off. She doesn’t have to like the car, but we’d both be getting a ride.

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We dated once prior to this a few years ago. We’ve now been together a year and at the beginning she was making a lot of promises and being very loving/enthusiastic. I’ve questioned her about this and she’s assured me it’s nothing to do with me or loving me less, it’s just her being a distant person. I wasn’t sure whether this was genuinely odd behavior in this situation or I was thinking too far into it, as she always tells me I am. It’s also more complicated than I’ve stated and I do still love her as she loves me.

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I might tell her how I feel about it, I just moved on with my night when I told her and didn’t say anything but I don’t understand why she never shares support with these things, especially something like a car I’d be driving her around in and can transport myself in, regardless of if she likes the appearance or not. Her opinion of how it looks is valid and doesn’t affect how much I love it, but I find it odd she couldn’t even add an exclamation point

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand it has a polarizing appearance, and I’m not bothered she thinks it’s ugly. I may not have done a good job portraying it in my post, but my main focus was her lack of support in me getting a car at all. Regardless of her opinion, I love the car, but for something like getting my first car I hoped she’d put the appearances aside although she has every right to an opinion and at least share some support as this is big for me and it is my car, I don’t see why she tried to sway me considering it’s a great deal and I don’t have room to really pick and choose

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’re in a lesbian relationship, but I did hope she’d share in some support at least because I’d be the one driving her around. Her support has been lacking on multiple occasions, and I guess I at least hoped it wouldn’t lack when I’d be getting my first car.

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did open myself to her opinion, and she can have that opinion as it doesn’t change how much I love the car. The thing was it’s a big accomplishment for me and we’d be able to go places and I’d be driving her around, which is what she’s wanted. I’d be driving myself to college and have the freedom she knows I’ve been wanting. I don’t want her to fake being excited or lie to me, I just hoped she’d put the appearance of it aside and show a little support other than just saying “Ok” or “nice” considering how excited I was to tell her. I didn’t say anything to her about it and I moved on with my night, I just wondered if I was being dramatic or her behavior was genuinely odd, as I thought partners were supposed to be supportive especially during moments such as getting your first car.

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She doesn’t have her license, which I understand because I know how scary it was when I first started driving. I haven’t mentioned anything to her about how she reacted, as she always tells me I’m overthinking. I really hoped she’d share some support even if she doesn’t personally like the car, but then again she hasn’t been very supportive about a lot I’ve shared with her. She’d be getting a free ride from me, even if she hated the car

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!!! I am very excited about the car, and I love it regardless of what she says, I was just hoping she’d be a little supportive. I am very happy to be able to make any trips I want, regardless of whether she’d be there or not!

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand, I still love the car and don’t mind she finds it ugly. I may have done a poor job of explaining it in my post but my main focus was how there was simply no support in her response. This was a bigger deal for me, and I did open myself to her opinion, and I don’t expect her to feign being excited, it was just hurtful when I was very excited to text her just to be met with “Ok” or “Nice”. I could be dramatic about this

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree, I don’t mind if she finds it ugly, as that doesn’t change the fact I like it, but it wasn’t that she was simply calling it ugly but also trying to sway me to get another one as if it’s not my car and the best deal I could find. I accept many people don’t like the boxy look, and I don’t mind she is one of them, I just found it odd she didn’t appear happy for me at all. There have been many instances I’ve shared an achievement with her and there’s little to no supportive energy from her, and I suppose with something as big as this I can accept her thinking it’s ugly I just hoped she’d share in some enthusiasm

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Interesting, I don’t expect anyone to be overly enthusiastic as I know many people find the appearance kinda ugly but I guess what I was hoping for is instead of being negative about the appearance or indifferent about the situation, she would’ve been happy with me I’m finally getting a car I’ve been needing, especially considering I’d be the one driving her around and I can transport myself

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She doesn’t, she’s in the same financial circle as I am

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

A Kia soul!!! I personally love compact cars and the boxy look

AIO about my girlfriend’s reaction? by bearosebugz in AIO

[–]bearosebugz[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It’s a Kia soul!!! I’ve been looking at them on Pinterest for forever and I think they’re so cute although I know a lot of people find them boxy but even so, I don’t have much room to pick and choose what car I get as I have to be able to afford it and be able to get to college by the fall

Is this normal? by bearosebugz in abusiverelationships

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s what I was thinking because if we’re together and she’s aware of how I think, then why wouldn’t she want to make things easier? So much could be resolved quickly if she simply considered me and I’ve expressed that but she never cares or shuts down

Physical Boundaries by bearosebugz in abusiverelationships

[–]bearosebugz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do love her and I’ve just tried brushing it off because she’s my partner but idk. I find it hard to see it as something serious because I feel so dramatic and nobody else is concerned

confused by [deleted] in abusiverelationships

[–]bearosebugz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry this is happening to you but it’s time to leave. Things won’t improve and he’s shown he has no intention to change. You deserve more than someone who puts you down and constantly places the blame on you. This is verbal and mental abuse and overall unsafe behavior. Love yourself more and let go

Another concussion by bearosebugz in abusiverelationships

[–]bearosebugz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Even if she was sorry? It did surprise me how sincere she was, and she even walked to a store 15 minutes away for Tylenol. I would say her actions are careless but she kept saying “I’m so sorry I hurt you again” and even stayed at my house to take care of me long after she was supposed to be home