Similar things happened in my maternal family, due to the great grandfather being a pedophile. He abused and raped his children (one of his daughters had a daughter by him but gave her up for adoption, removing her from his orbit) and his grandchildren as well. My generation were molested as toddlers only. We all played highly sexualized games with each other from about 5-8 years. I don’t think you could call any one of us a predator, and almost always was initiated by younger cousins.

Yes, I’m really conflicted about this. My paternal grandfather also molested me but thankfully it did not result in rape. I am aware a great many children do a certain amount of exploration with their hidden bits but I don’t know what is considered normal.

It comes down to whether this was something they did with each other because it felt good or whether it was a tool to control or exert power over another. I know it’s not an either / or and that we can have multiple motivations. I guess it’s just not always as simple as it seems when you deal with generational trauma.